Posts Tagged ‘ASD’
We can Change the World
The other day I was chatting with a friend and she was telling me about when her son was diagnosed with autism. And she said… ‘I knew I couldn’t change autism, so I decided I had to change the world.’ I’ve been thinking about it nonstop. Because, see friends, in the beginning, I didn’t have a lot of support. Or resources. Or knowledge of my son’s mysterious disorder and…I thought my purpose was to change it. I didn’t understand. Now I do. And this amazing mama, she knew what I…
Read MoreFather’s Day
Facebook memories are so lovely some times. Father’s Day. Five years ago… This is how Cooper slept last night. He was so proud of the Father’s Day card he helped make for daddy. He will carry it around until it’s just a shred of paper. I always say Cooper loves object until there is nothing left of them. My heart melted when I checked on him and saw the card laid out. He is all heart that kid. A huge misconception about children with autism is that they don’t make…
Read MoreTwo Brothers
Back in the beginning, when the folder was slid across the table, and the words ‘severe nonverbal autism’ were said out loud… I remember wishing for a crystal ball. I wanted to know what the future held for my boy. His brother. Our family. I begged. I pleaded. I bargained. I prayed. For a glimpse. This is the one I wish I could have seen. Right here. A moment in time. In the peace from the chaos. Two brothers. Two years apart. One verbal. One not. One on track. One…
Read MoreHe Talks in His own Special Way
Tonight my son Cooper was listening to a song on his iPad. The tune was familiar. In fact, I bet I’ve been hearing the same song on and off for eight plus years. I was doing something in the kitchen when he came in. My three year old was hungry. My baby wanted to nurse. My kitchen was dirty. And here comes my son, dancing. He touched my arm for a second. Then a second longer. He forced my attention. He smiled. A smirk really. And he touched my ear.…
Read MoreKeep Going Mama
I think about you sometimes mama. 28 years old. You just had your first baby. You felt joyful. Exhausted. Your nipples hurt. Heck, it all hurt. But you didn’t mind. Because you had the most beautiful baby boy. You named him Cooper months before he was born. You painted his nursery blue. You went to birthing classes and read What To Expect When You Are Expecting. Your husband bought him a baseball glove and bat. And a Minnesota Wild jersey. You were both so ready for him when he arrived.…
Read MoreHow to Help Someone With Invisible Disabilities
People ask me all the time how they can help. Kind people. Loving people. Strangers. Friends. Family. People on this page. I speak about that out of control feeling that happens when my son starts struggling. When his big feelings about waiting or sitting overwhelm him. Or when the noise is too much, and the lights are too bright, or he smells something in the air that you and I can’t make out. Maybe we are in line at the grocery store. Or at a park. Or in the paper…
Read MoreThe Tether
He is tethered to me. This son of mine. It connects us at all times, his lifeline. As he’s aged the rope has started to reach farther. I can move throughout the house without him following me from room to room. But he knows. He always knows where I am. I can go in the front yard and visit with neighbors. He waits for me, typically on the porch or just inside the glass storm door, watching. The tether seeming to expand and contract. I can go on my nightly…
Read MoreHe is More
My son is nonverbal. Although I’m not supposed to use that term anymore. The preferred term is ‘non-speaking.’ I am tired of arguing about descriptions so I will just explain. I think it’s easier that way. My son is eleven years old. And he has very few actual words. It’s hard to believe but it’s important to understand. It’s important to take a glimpse into someone’s life sometimes. That’s how we learn. He can say his name if asked. Cooper. He makes a sound for each letter. Six sounds. The…
Read MoreDate Your Spouse
My husband and I spend a lot of time together. But not quality time. He is throwing baseballs and I am doing dishes. He is folding laundry and I am washing a baby in the tub. We are together. But not really. We don’t actually talk. We just do. All the things. And then at the end of the night we are so tired we just sit in silence with the tv on mute. Four kids will do that to you. Tonight we are at a concert together and it…
Read MoreI Pray for You
My sweet boy, In the beginning, back when I found out I was pregnant with you, I prayed for you to be healthy. When you were born, I prayed for you to breathe. To nurse. To sleep. As you grew from a nugget to a meatball, I prayed for you to roll over, sit up, crawl, and walk. Then I prayed for you to speak. To play. To see other people. To let me touch you. To embrace the world. I prayed for you to be like the other kids…
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