Everyone’s accepting of autism until you see my boy on the floor, mid-meltdown, and blame my parenting. The whispers and the stares as you walked past were not unnoticed, but my child needed me more than you needed my reaction. Everyone’s accepting of autism until his stimming doesn’t quite fit in your little box and you feel like he’s too old to behave that way. Everyone’s accepting of autism until you get annoyed that we cannot attend an event because it is not suited for our special needs child. Everyone’s…
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Autism is in the news right now. And I keep thinking… There has to be an in-between space right now. If you are anything like me, this polar extremism makes me want to hide. And stay silent. I’m scared to comment. I’m scared to share. Like it’s a minefield and I don’t want to misstep. My son Cooper is 14 years old. Eleven years ago, we heard the words… Severe Nonverbal Autism. Boy, it about broke me. And yes, for anyone wondering, we knew it was coming. He had no…
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It has taken my husband, Michael, and me a couple of days to recover from four plane rides and three days of navigating D.C., but we are so glad we seized the opportunity to do it. Individuals with severe/profound autism and their caregivers/families are so often left out of the conversation and robbed of a seat at the table. We are isolated and forgotten, even though 27% of individuals with ASD are severe/profound. The Authentic Awareness Assembly event, put on by the National Council on Severe Autism (NCSA), gave families…
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Every April, Autism Acceptance Month rolls around, and with it, I find myself hoping—hoping that this year, maybe things will be different. That maybe, just maybe, people will take a moment to listen, to learn, to be kind. That maybe we can combine awareness and genuine acceptance. My Hopes for Autism Acceptance Month This Year 1. That People Take the Opportunity to Learn Autism isn’t a one-size-fits-all diagnosis. It’s a spectrum, and no two autistic individuals are exactly the same. My biggest hope is that people take the time to…
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A few days ago, our family of 6, was dropping off our middle son at his hockey practice. Usually, I stay in the car with the other three kids, while dad brings Sawyer in. But this practice was different and many of the families had gathered in the parking lot. When Cooper and our third son saw the excitement of kids playing in the somewhat deserted parking lot, squirting water bottles, running and laughing, they immediately demanded their release from our car. They both wanted to join in. Within seconds,…
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My firstborn son’s autism diagnosis humbled me.Why you may ask?Because it was the first thing in my life that I couldn’t necessarily make better or easier or even change. See, I am a fixer. And I am a hard worker. Two traits that I pride myself on. And suddenly I was given a baby who didn’t develop typically. And never learned to talk. Or play. Or to understand this world.Autism they said.Severe nonverbal autism with a language impairment were the exact terms.He was three years old.His hair was course and…
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My youngest daughter is 16 years old and a sophomore in high school. She is autistic and is also diagnosed with sensory processing disorder and anxiety. I keep getting all the exciting emails from my daughter’s high school that it’s “time for”: Time for your student to pick classes for next year. Time for spring sports tryouts, come be a part of the team. Time for prom season, tickets go on sale soon… Did you get your tux or dress? Time for your student to get a summer job. Parks…
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I am not autistic, my son is. And I spend much of time trying to understand him so I can be a better advocate.How he thinks.How he processes.Why he likes certain things.Or doesn’t like others.And how I can help him understand this world that wasn’t really made for him.His brain often feels a bit confusing to me. Mysterious even. Intriguing at the same time. Autism. Blurring the edges a bit. Touching all of his parts. Yesterday, as we were driving together, Cooper saw a pool. And let me tell you…
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I have four children. My oldest has autism. My second son is 12 years old. He is two years younger than his older brother. He grew up autism adjacent. A boy born into advocacy. He knows no other life. But he is also a little boy. Who still wonders and worries. He gets angry sometimes. And he cries too. And there are so many parts that he doesn’t understand. He’s asked me if he will be the older brother someday. He’s asked me if God is still building his brother’s…
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When we are out in public, I don’t worry about how my autistic son will act. I don’t worry about his mannerisms. Or his uniqueness. Because I know exactly who he is and how he is going to behave. And that he is learning and growing. I know he will flap his arms in pure joy. I know he will run. And sit. And maybe feel the cool of the cement with his cheek. I know he will squeal. And hum. And laugh. I know he will wave to strangers…
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