Guest Post
A Love Note to My Wife
Autism is hard! Hard for the diagnosed individual, the siblings, the family and on a marriage. When we said “I do” we never expected to embark on an autism journey and we definitely didn’t envision the vows “in sickness and in health” would apply to our unborn child. Autism has challenged our marriage in ways we could never imagine and it has enriched our marriage in ways nothing else could. I could share some of the many autism moments, experiences, pitfalls, disappointments, lessons, achievements, challenges, and wins that got us…
Read MoreThe Playground can be Isolating for a Special Needs Parent
If you live in a city apartment and don’t have your own backyard, the playground is THE place for kids to burn some energy and let off steam. Every other day we pack cookies, water, and a soccer ball and head to my most feared opponent. The park is packed with laughing children. Parents stand in groups and exchange the latest neighborhood gossip. Some have made themselves comfortable on carefully arranged picnic blankets, setting up a snack buffet that could feed half of the city. Others sit in the sand…
Read MoreA Letter to My Son, A Special Needs Sibling
A thank you letter to my Son… Being an older brother to a sibling with severe autism has not always been easy. It’s a job you never asked for but you took with stride. At times it was a very difficult and that is putting mildly. Thank you for loving your little sister wholeheartedly. You were her light in the darkest of times when her life was filled with sensory overload, when nothing made sense to her little body and she was completely overwhelmed by our world. When she would…
Read MoreTo My Incredible Husband – I Thank God For You
A life partner or soulmate is a person who accepts you for exactly who you are without the desire to change or fix you. There is a deep and unspoken respect between both partners. Your strengths compliment theirs and you hold each other tightly during challenging times. The healthiest relationships are rooted in open and frequent communication. Following my first marriage, it took time for me to feel comfortable in my own skin and redefine what truly makes me happy. Although I burdened myself with the assumption that I’d be a single…
Read MoreHeartbroken at the Airport-Special Needs Families Are Getting Denied at the Gate
On Saint Patrick’s Day, I got up at 3:00 a.m. had our bags packed the night before, ready for a trip with my baby girl to visit family in Montana. I filled a carry-on bag with new toys, snacks, hand sanitizer, charged headphones, and of course, our masks. That morning I woke up our two-year-old Nora, she meet me with a doe eyed look but was in good spirits. I changed her into a cute black shirt with toile on the bottom and slipped on a black hoodie paired with…
Read MoreMoms, You are Enough
“Maybe if you didn’t baby him, he would talk more.” Seven years ago, spoken by a person long since absent from our world, yet the words remain a stinging reminder of the blame imposed on mothers of children with special needs at various junctures of our journeys. Self- blame, along with the judgement of others often intertwine, creating an incredibly crippling feeling of guilt; unyielding at times, as we as parents…as moms, attempt to navigate the challenges associated with raising a child on the spectrum. Merely a half a century…
Read MoreThe Girl in the Shrubs
Yesterday was a warm day and a sweet reminder that better days are on their way. Seagulls dipped down low over the playground where my children played. The air carried the ocean smell and the sounds of children laughing despite a Pandemic. The best sound is children laughing. I pushed my neighbor’s child on a tire swing and I had my eyes on my son. I knew my daughter was across the playground with a friend and her mother. The sun was warm against my face and I felt happy.…
Read MoreI Will Sit With You in the Dark
Hello! I see you down there. You must be a fellow special needs mom. We can recognize each other you see. I know where you are right now because I’ve been there, and I’ll be there again. I know that the hole you are in is deep, and it’s dark and it’s scary. I know it feels like you will never get out, like you will never feel the warmth of the sun on your face again. Never feel joy. Hope. I know that you are trying to figure out…
Read MoreHaving a Tribe Can Make All the Difference
“Build your tribe. Find your village. You’re going to need them.” I remember looking up at our pediatrician through tears as she said those words to me shortly after delivering my son’s Autism diagnosis. She explained how dynamic and changing our lives would be and that we would need to find others who understood. The gravity of those words didn’t quite register with me at first. I mean, I had friends. I had family. What did she mean I needed others? At first, I was lost in my grief for…
Read MoreI Know What It’s Like to Sit in the Dark
As a child I always felt different. I had some dolls and Barbies but I never played with them. I’d rather have them set up or put new clothes on them. But I never played with them. I remember first grade, my best friend was sick and ended up dying from a brain tumor. I cried a bit but the day I went to school I didn’t shed one tear. The rest of the class was sobbing. I couldn’t understand why some kids were crying because they didn’t even like…
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