Posts Tagged ‘special needs parent’
Suddenly, I Was a Special Needs Parent
Before my daughter was diagnosed the world of special needs was unknown to me. When I dreamed of motherhood being a special needs parent never crossed my mind. Suddenly I joined a club I never thought I would be a part of. Special needs terrified me. Just those two words sent chills down my spine. It was a world I knew nothing about. And then a picture will come across my memories newsfeed and it suddenly pulls me back to the days prior to being a special needs parent. I…
Read MoreI Can Tell You When My Son Is Happy, But Not Why
I look into his blue eyes and tried to find some common sense, some meaning in them. Some hidden reason why he was hitting his head with his hands, over and over. Some deep psychology as to why he was screaming. Some reason why, why did he do this. But instead I find silence. There is no panic in this boy’s eyes. No desperate urges. No curiosity. No hint that he is conscious and knows what is going on. At all. Many people say to me, after finding out about…
Read MoreRoad Trip
We are headed to a pool and our three boys are so excited. We have a long drive ahead of us…3 hours! In Sawyer’s mind that’s ‘like two whole days!’ Cooper is wonderful in the car which is night and day different than it used to be. He’s been packed and ready to go since first light this morning. And by packed I don’t mean clothes…I mean his treasures. They are in that bag he is holding. It’s his happy stuff. The baby is the most challenging one in the…
Read MoreSpecial Needs Mamas, Don’t Stay in the Hard
This morning I was headed to pick up my son from his hybrid, half days of kindergarten. I thought about how tired I was, how much I was tired of shortened school days, and then my favorite song came on and snapped me out of my complaints. Our day had started hours before the sun was ready to come up, when the house was quiet, and we could watch cartoons and eat cereal with leisure. This was our life for so many years, two am wake ups for weeks, or…
Read MoreA Taste of Inclusion
Last year my son Stalen went to preschool. I was so nervous and scared. It’s one thing to send your child off without you but it’s another when they are non-verbal, on the autism spectrum and have a lot of unique challenges. Stalen has pica so I was worried that he would eat something he shouldn’t. He also is a runner and elopes so that weighed heavily on my mind. I was worried about him being accepted, I was worried that he wouldn’t make any friends. I was worried that…
Read MoreFocus on the Color
I want to brag on this little boy for a minute. His dad and I just finished up his yearly assessment with the state. I know every country is different when it comes to autism. Heck, states and even counties are different in the USA. Services and supports vary. Some better than others. We live in a fantastic state for disabilities. Minnesota values people with additional needs and prioritizes their independence, goals, and dreams. We are blessed to get the supports and services that we need to help our son…
Read MoreIf It Makes Them Happy, Do It.
There is a quote that says, ‘don’t ever save anything for a special occasion. Every day you’re alive is a special occasion.’ My son Cooper reminds me of that quote every single day. The reason I’m sharing it with you is because someone recently commented on one of my posts, pointing out that we always have balloons in our house. And it’s true, they are everywhere. They drift through the house, from room to room. Birthday balloons. Dora balloons. Square. Round. All brightly colored. Some old. Some new. Why? Because…
Read MoreLet me Tell You About the Siblings
I want you to know something. I want you to know that I hear you when you say his screams are too loud. That I see you when the disappointment of delayed plans hits or when a need overshadows a want. That I understand when things don’t go the way you had hoped. I want you to know that I’m painfully aware at how much our world has tipped upside down. From the emergency c-section, to the American way of postpartum care that failed. The 14 months of 24/7 care…
Read MoreWe Waited Ten Years For This
Beautiful things are happening between these two brothers. Things that we weren’t sure would happen. Things we accepted may never happen. Because we just didn’t know. They have never played a game together, at least not in the traditional sense. Sawyer tried for years to engage his older brother but never had any luck. It was heartbreaking for him. But lately, Cooper is loving to wrestle, tickle, run, and chase his brothers. It came out of nowhere. It’s a gift. He laughs so deep from his belly and his face…
Read MoreMamas who are in the Grief Stage; it is okay
Why would you feel grief over autism? Your child is alive. They are healthy, even happy most of the time. It could be so much worse they say. I have said those words to myself as well as had others say them to me. It does little to bring you comfort in the darkest corner of your mind. All it really does is make you feel guilty and believe me we feel an insurmountable amount of guilt already. The guilt can be even worse than the grief. I could tell you…
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