Posts Tagged ‘Special Needs Child’
Trying to Stop Time
My son, Your birthday is in 8 days. You have been counting down since mid December. You love your birthday. And you love being older. So much so that you are already telling people you are 8 years old. I lovingly correct you every time, reminding you that you are still my 7 year old. I also threaten you with a potion that will keep you little forever. But you have no time for that nonsense. You want to grow up. I want time to stop. Last night you snuggled…
Read MoreMothers Feel an Intimate Connection to Their Nonverbal Children
From the moment you get news of a baby on the way, Mother’s focus is on the best way to take care of this beautiful little human. We read books, talk to other Mothers, restrict our diet, and wonder what it will be like when we meet our baby. We often worry if we are making the right choices and if we mothering correctly. After we hold our baby, we focus on Mothering. Is the baby sleeping enough? Should we breastfeed or bottle-feed, when should they try their first bite…
Read MoreThank you for Always Having Your Brother’s Back
Dear Jonah, You’re 11 today! How time has flown! There were a million things I wanted to write to you on your birthday card this morning but didn’t want to get too mushy. Birthdays are supposed to be fun and lighthearted. What I wanted to tell you is how proud I am of you. I know it can be difficult at times having a brother with special needs, especially when it’s your twin. There have been times you have told me you feel like the older brother and I get…
Read MoreBuilding an Autism Bridge Between Generations
There’s a meme that’s been circulating Facebook this week. It reads: ‘In my day, they didn’t have all this Autism and ADHD and stuff.’ ‘I think what you mean is that people used to go undiagnosed and get absolutely no help and were forced to suffer through their lives because they had zero support or understanding.’ Every time this pops up in my newsfeed, it reminds me of the worry I felt the day I explained to my then 84 and 85 year old Grandparents that my young daughter, Evie,…
Read MoreLight at the End of the Tunnel
The comment read, ‘for some families, there is no light at the end of the tunnel.’ I thought about it all night. And when my toddler woke up at midnight for a hug, and then again while I drank my coffee and watched the news. I thought back to our hardest days when there was no apparent light at the end of the tunnel. Our autistic son didn’t sleep longer than 45 minutes at a time and we started every day at 3 am. We lived in this place of…
Read MoreWe Figured it Out
I don’t consider myself to be an expert in parenting. Or an expert in anything really. I don’t always do the right thing or handle every bump in the road perfectly. I didn’t fall gracefully into autism when my first born son was diagnosed at age 3. I more so crashed. Head first. With zero guidance. They say help is readily available for families like mine. Let’s be clear here. It wasn’t. We figured it all out on our own. Maybe it’s different now. I pray that it is. Because…
Read MoreIt Wasn’t You
My son, This morning you happily went to school. That sentence right there. I felt the tears pooling in my eyes as I typed it just seconds ago. Happily. Went. School. You put your own shoes on, brought me your coat, gathered up your treasures, picked up your backpack, and waited calmly by the door. It was 8:16 am. You know the bus comes at 8:23. You don’t seem to mind waiting. Your little brother waits with you, although I don’t think he necessarily brings you peace. But you appease…
Read MoreIt’s Different for the Dads
I imagine it’s different for the dads. The dads like my husband. Last night I sat in the bleachers of a cold hockey rink watching my middle son play hockey. I glanced back behind me and took note of all the dads standing in a row. My husband was sandwiched in-between a group of 5 or so men. A snapshot out of the suburbia playbook. They all shared a striking resemblance. Middle aged men. Black jackets. Black facemasks. All wearing hats. We are in the stage of life I suppose.…
Read MoreWaiting for School
The sweet email said…’Cooper has been on my mind all day! How was his first day back to school?’ I’ll admit I teared up a bit as I read her words. The kindness of strangers continues to amaze and humble me. And she wasn’t the only one who asked about him. There were dozens of emails and messages asking how he did. Cooper had a fantastic day at school! I was a bit nervous this morning because somewhere wires got crossed and his bus never came. He was dressed and…
Read MoreTheir Special Bond
This morning we were running around getting three kids ready to leave the house. Packing lunches, finding school iPads, headphones and chargers, gathering snow gear…it was a lot. We are definitely out of practice. Jamie noticed that Coops put his shoes on the wrong feet. It happens quite frequently but we are also so proud of him for putting his shoes on that we don’t mind fixing them. Sawyer, who was soaking up his last few minutes of holiday break, and zoning out watching his iPad, must have heard us.…
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