Posts Tagged ‘severe autism’
Would you be so Understanding?
I found myself out today in the community with my six year old son and my baby. We were in a group of people. We were quietly sitting. And by quietly I mean Sawyer was bouncing off the walls and the baby was chatting up a storm. Just as kids should be. Busy and happy. It was lovely. The three of us out together. I’m stretched a little thin these days so it’s nice to get time with my kids. I found myself looking around. I found myself missing Cooper.…
Read MoreWill you just be my Mom Now?
I remember distinctively being a little girl and being so excited to sleep in my mom’s big bed when my dad went out of town. It was such a treat. It was the best part of him going on a trip. My son Sawyer now feels the same way. Last night, as I was putting all three boys to bed, Sawyer said to me, ‘Mom, since dad is gone, can I sleep with you?’ I still had a dozen things to do before bed so I said maybe. I said…
Read MoreJust See Him and Say Hello
I’ve learned so many things on this journey of parenting a child with autism. I’ve learned that many people get scared of the word autism. I’ve learned that some people think my son is deaf because he’s nonverbal. Or that he can’t answer questions. I’ve watched people get nervous by flapping or his unique sounds. Or by his silence. I’ve watched people completely ignore him. Or they ask me questions for him. ‘Is he hungry?’ Which I respond with, ‘Let’s ask him.’ These aren’t bad people. They aren’t mean. Usually…
Read MoreThe Stuff I Prayed For
A few years ago, when we started to notice that our other son Sawyer was feeling the unique stresses of having a brother with autism, I started taking him out for breakfast every Wednesday. No matter what we wouldn’t miss. It was our time to chat and relax and eat doughnuts! We both looked forward to it. I remember distinctly thinking…I’ve never done anything like this with Cooper. And I might never. My son Cooper had never asked me to go anywhere. He was seven years old at the time.…
Read MoreFriend, Don’t Ever Downplay your Child’s Wins for Me
The other day I ran into an old friend at Target. I hadn’t seen her in ages. It was the same old story. Kids, jobs, chaos and time just slipped away. Before we knew it a year had past since we last spoke. We decided to stretch our time at Target and grab a coffee and chat. One of the reasons that this friend and I initially bonded is because we both have kids on the spectrum. We met at an advocacy event and connected immediately. Both our boys were…
Read MoreDream Night at the Minnesota Zoo
Dream Night at the Minnesota Zoo is my most favorite event ever. Every year I leave feeling humbled, thankful and so happy to see so many families just like ours. There is no walking on eggshells. There is no worrying that people are judging us. There is no panicking when our kid runs or flaps or melts down. Instead, it’s beautiful children and amazing parents, caregivers, grandparents, therapists and others who live in our world. The boys each had a blast. Cooper spent his time running and looking for penguins!…
Read MoreA Victory for our Family
Here is the photo that means so much to Jamie and I. We take nothing for granted because we know how hard our son works to do tasks that seem so simple to the world. It’s not as simple as going to church. It’s pressure. It’s putting on special clothes. Riding to a new place with his personal care attendant. Walking into a building. Staying calm with noisy people. Smiling for photos. We practiced for months. We worked on skills every single day. It’s a pretty big deal. And in…
Read MoreTeacher Gives Boy with Autism ‘Most Annoying’ Award
As a mom to a child with autism, I have many fears about the world we live in. I worry about children bullying him. I worry about his safety. I worry about him being targeted for emotional, physical or even emotional abuse. I worry about so many things. I’m his mom. That’s my job. But honestly, never have I worried about something like this story. A father is expressing disbelief this week after his fifth-grader, who is autistic, was given a trophy dubbing him the “most annoying male” for the…
Read MoreWhat’s the Biggest Change you’ve seen from Medication?
A lot of parents ask me about medications. Is our son on them? What specifically are you treating? Do they work? Side effects? What’s the biggest change you’ve see with them? They ask because they need help helping their child. It’s as simple as that. They aren’t lazy parents. They aren’t giving up. They’ve tried the therapies. They’ve researched. They’ve advocated. They’ve done more than they every thought possible. And their child still needs more. Maybe it’s with anxiety. Or with ADHD. Or even depression. And let me be clear…
Read MoreDon’t Cut the Highs or the Lows Short
When I look at the toughest times in my life… My miscarriage. When my son was diagnosed with autism. When I was struggling with my marriage. Occasional money troubles. Losing people I love. I see a few common themes. One…I had no one to talk too. And two…I tried to pretend I was fine. I tried to rush through the hard. I had no one in my life that was going through similar issues. Or if they were…I had no idea. Because I was too afraid to talk about my…
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