Posts Tagged ‘severe autism’
You are Amazing Kid
My son has never ran inside to show me something. He has never rushed home from school to tell me about his day. He’s never told me a story. Or even asked me a question. There is no school work to look at. No homework to do at night. No report cards. His artwork is not hanging on the fridge either. We said goodbye to all of that possibility in kindergarten. We said goodbye to typical education. We shifted our focus. We picked the things that really mattered. Safety. Awareness.…
Read MoreBe With the One Who Gets It
Be with the man who holds a leg in the delivery room. Who helps hold your boob when you are sobbing over trying to get a newborn to latch at 3 AM on day two. Who thinks you are beautiful despite the baby weight. Be with the person who changes diapers. And I don’t mean just baby diapers. The one who will change them long after age 2 and 3. And coaches t-ball and goes to every hockey game and Miracle League Baseball Game. The one who gives your babies…
Read MoreIt’s the Little Things that Matter
You think the big things are the most important. The ones that will make the most impact. Saying words. Making a friend. Joining a team. Going to school. Graduating. Those are the milestones we work towards. Right? And yes, of course they are important. But as I grow into being the best mom for my son, and watch him grow into himself, I realize it’s the little things that make the biggest difference in our world. That make the most impact on our every day life and sanity. A smile.…
Read MoreKids who Hurt and the Parents who Love Them
I noticed the little girl right away. 7 or 8 maybe. She was sitting in a chair, on an iPad. Quietly. She had curls. Blonde ones. She was stunning really. I was waiting for my son and impatient. I had a million things to do and lately it felt like I was spending a lot of time in waiting rooms. I heard it before I saw it. The sounds. Like an animal. The iPad hit the table. The girl sprung out of her seat, ran and dived onto the little…
Read MoreAutism has no Cure…But Luckily, Ignorance Does
I’ve been on this journey with my boys for 18 years now and after a while, you just get sick of hearing yourself complain. I’m sick of being the Debbie Downer when someone asks how our weekend was. No one wants to hang with “doom and gloom chick”. Much like Autism doesn’t just “go away” at 10, the misunderstandings and judgment doesn’t either. I am a mother of two young men on the spectrum. One of which is 17 years old, with Severe Autism. He is somewhat verbal but unable…
Read MoreHis Secret World
This has always been our special place. It’s the one place I could bring both boys from an early age. It’s the one place that my nonstop moving boy would sit. He would be still. Sifting sand. And my younger son could play too, finding friends within seconds. And I could stop holding my breath. Even just for a minute. Cooper would look at the beach and choose a spot as far away from the kids as possible. He’d hunch over. And enter his happy place. Sawyer would look at…
Read MoreLooking into the Future
We chatted today. I was the mom next to you in the neurologists office with the two redheaded girls. Even if my girls weren’t loud and imposing in small spaces, I’m sure you would still remember us. I saw you watching them as you nervously waited for your appointment. And after seeing your beautiful little girl, I’m pretty sure we share more than a love of Wawa frozen cappuccinos. As your little lady sat on the floor with her kindle, I’m guessing I saw more than most moms would in this…
Read MoreYou are Enough Moms and Dads
As a mom to a little boy with severe, nonverbal autism, I spend more time than I would like to admit wondering if this is all going to be okay. Will my son be okay and safe and thrive in a world that isn’t designed for him? I wonder if I am doing enough for him? Heck, I wonder if I am enough for him? And I’ve learned one thing. At our darkest, lowest points in life, something beautiful will happen. Something unbelievable. Something that will rejuvenate you. Give you…
Read MoreTo the Parents who Admit it’s Hard
To the parents who say it’s hard. And talk about the hard. The ones who don’t hide. Or lie. Or fake it. But instead learn from it. And let the hard make them stronger. I see you. To the parents that have figured it out. Or at least figured it out enough. Thank you for helping others. For supporting and lifting up. For answering a midnight text saying, ‘I can’t do this anymore. ‘And reminding them, ‘yes, you can.’ To the parents who don’t judge. Who offer a hand, dinner,…
Read MoreAcknowledging the Forever
I am a ‘take it one day at a time’ kind of mom. And some days, when my kids aren’t sleeping or I feel like I am losing my mind, I’m a ‘take it one hour at a time’ mom. Just make it through the day. To bedtime. Or through the night. The sun will surely rise. This mothering thing will be easier tomorrow. It’s a new day. But I want you to know that I didn’t start to truly accept my son’s special needs until I began to feel…
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