Guest Post
Special Needs Behaviors Can’t be Fixed With Traditional Discipline
We need to talk about discipline. Particularly discipline and special needs children. My oldest has Autism and a handful of other diagnosis. For most of his younger years he simply did not have behaviors at home. His behaviors occurred at school and I strongly subscribed (past tense to some extent) to the ideology that kids should not be double punished. That if something happens at school, and the child receives a consequence, that the child should not be double punished at home. Then my life exploded. A handful of close deaths.…
Read MoreAs a Special Needs Sibling, She Will Learn From Him Too
She sat beside me in the car, diligently working on sorting letters from the Elmo case she so often carries in her clutches, occupying much of her days… We waited for her Brother, who inside the adjacent building sat working on his own set of goals, alongside his SLP, and OT. “A for Apple! B is for Baby!” Eva proudly exclaimed, gazing up at me, her smile filled with wonder and excitement. A girl after my own heart…her love of books, words, and the letters that encompass them all emanates…
Read MoreDreams Don’t Die, They Change
We all remember that day. The visit, the phone call, or the letter. And you hear or read those words: “Your child is on the autism spectrum.” I know I will never forget. I can still hear the Dr. saying, “We can go two different routes here. We can give the diagnosis of PDD/NOS or Autism.” I think he was truly trying to spare us that ominous word. I voted for Autism. I knew enough to know that the diagnosis of autism was our ticket to services. See, this all…
Read MoreI’m Not Like Most 25 Year Old Moms, My Son has Autism
I’m a young mom, 25 now to be exact.When you become a mom in your early 20’s the pressures are different then I feel like those in their 30’s. Girls night’s are mandatory and happen probably way too often. We’re praised for the simplest things like keeping our children alive. There’s no pressure to be the perfect PTA mom driving around in our minivans, because truthfully in a lot of ways we’re still kids ourselves trying to navigate adulthood. We are the first in line for our Pumpkin Spice Lattes…
Read MoreThank You to the Doctor Who Heard My Cry for Help
I am writing this letter to thank the doctor who gave my daughter a fighting chance. You were the first person to listen to our cry for help. I was a new mom. My daughter was not meeting her milestones on time. There were so many nights that she just cried for hours. There was something wrong. Her helpless little body could not tell me the real reason things were not going well. It was heartbreaking. This was not what I imagined when deciding to become a mother. I…
Read MoreAll I Can Do Is Hold Him
This is the face of a child who has suffered so much during this lockdown. And yet, he still smiles. He doesn’t understand why things are closed, or why he cannot go to school. He doesn’t understand why his favorite places are closed or why we stay home all the time. He doesn’t understand why we need to wear masks. I have tried, but he cannot wear one. It’s hard to explain to people why. No, he can’t wear a visor instead, trust me we are still working on it.…
Read MoreMothers Feel an Intimate Connection to Their Nonverbal Children
From the moment you get news of a baby on the way, Mother’s focus is on the best way to take care of this beautiful little human. We read books, talk to other Mothers, restrict our diet, and wonder what it will be like when we meet our baby. We often worry if we are making the right choices and if we mothering correctly. After we hold our baby, we focus on Mothering. Is the baby sleeping enough? Should we breastfeed or bottle-feed, when should they try their first bite…
Read MoreI Don’t Mind You Staring At My Brother’s Disability
Living 36 years of my life having a brother with a disability has made me embrace the things I can’t change. Being the sibling of a brother with a disability has taught me many life lessons, and one of those lessons I’m sharing today in this blog. There is one thing that all families who have a child/sibling with a disability have experienced more often than not…….People who stare. When they notice a difference in the people around them, they stare. When they observe or hear a different form of…
Read MoreThank you for Always Having Your Brother’s Back
Dear Jonah, You’re 11 today! How time has flown! There were a million things I wanted to write to you on your birthday card this morning but didn’t want to get too mushy. Birthdays are supposed to be fun and lighthearted. What I wanted to tell you is how proud I am of you. I know it can be difficult at times having a brother with special needs, especially when it’s your twin. There have been times you have told me you feel like the older brother and I get…
Read MoreBuilding an Autism Bridge Between Generations
There’s a meme that’s been circulating Facebook this week. It reads: ‘In my day, they didn’t have all this Autism and ADHD and stuff.’ ‘I think what you mean is that people used to go undiagnosed and get absolutely no help and were forced to suffer through their lives because they had zero support or understanding.’ Every time this pops up in my newsfeed, it reminds me of the worry I felt the day I explained to my then 84 and 85 year old Grandparents that my young daughter, Evie,…
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