Posts

Thank You: Why Family Restrooms Matter to Families Like Mine

November 25, 2024

My message to establishments that have family restrooms. THANK YOU. Before I had a child with a disability, I was oblivious to a lot of things. I foolishly assumed that all kids went to restaurants, and used public restrooms and even transitioned from riding in a cart to walking. I didn’t know that some children are deathly afraid of automatic flushing toilets and hand dryers. I didn’t know that some parents are unable to go into gas stations or even go through drive thrus. But the biggest thing that I…

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Planning for Serendipity

November 22, 2024

This adorable newborn picture is proof of my planning-ahead prowess (and also my love of anything involving a theme, costume, and/or celebration). Since my first child was due in October, I was obviously going to make sure we got an amazing Christmas card picture during our newborn photo session. So, I consulted Pinterest, conferred with our photographer, et voilà! I always have lots of plans bubbling cheerfully away on the back burner of my mind. It’s just how I’m wired. And boy, do I love it when a plan comes…

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Unexpected Moments: The Magic of My Son’s Christmas Spirit

November 21, 2024

I’ve learned as I’ve aged that the biggest, most memorable moments of our lives, are often the ones we least expect. Of course a wedding, the birth of our babies, an anniversary, are the best. But other ones sneak in. When you least expect them. A solo car ride with your son. A walk with your aging parent. Staying up way too late drinking wine with your husband. Coffee with a friend. Or when your first born takes it upon himself to decorate for Christmas. Now, I know that may…

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The Club Sandwich Generation and Forever Caregiving

November 19, 2024

I have often called myself a member of the “sandwich generation.”  But after a little research, I discovered that I am actually a member of the “club sandwich generation.” The term refers to the midlife generation being wedged between the needs of different family members: parents, children, and grandchildren. My mother is living, and I am a wife, a mother, and a grandmother. I’ll go a step further and add extra meat and extra mayo, lots of extra mayo! I am a forever caregiver for my 39-year-old son with autism.…

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The Beauty of Sawyer’s Soul

November 19, 2024

Yesterday, I drove my middle son Sawyer to school. He typically rides the bus but he wanted to donate a handful of toys to the toy drive his school was holding so I drove him. ‘The toys go to Children’s Hospital mom.’ He was adamant about bringing presents. As we drove he asked me a zillion questions. As a mom, I’ve learned that some of the best conversations happen in the car. After tell me that he has a project due this week and about something he saw on YouTube,…

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Why Positive Moments Matter in Our Autism Journey

November 11, 2024

When I share our autism story with professionals…teachers, therapists, doctors, nurses, I always say this sentence: Something you have said to a parent about their child, positive or negative, runs through their head on repeat. It’s true. Many have hardened me. Some have lightened the load. We have been told so many things. Your son will never talk, make a friend, or ride a bike. If your son doesn’t have any words by age four than game over. Your son is absolutely amazing! And then this one. One of my…

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Facing Forever: The Hardest Talks About Our Son’s Future

November 8, 2024

Parents of kids with disabilities… What is the most difficult, yet important conversation you’ve had around your child’s needs? Maybe it was around medications. Or the decision to have more children. Or to let go of education and focus on daily living skills. For my husband and I, it was around forever. It was grappling with the thought that our son will live on this earth without us. It took us years to be able to sit down and rationally speak about it. In the beginning, I’d bring it up.…

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Feet Bigger Than Mine: A Mother’s Journey with Autism

November 6, 2024

I don’t talk about our challenges associated with autism all that much any more. Some followers assume that life is easier now. Or our son is less autistic. Neither of those things are true. Cooper is still very much significantly affected. But he is also wonderfully supported. We, his family, our friends, his team, we know how to support him. And because of that…he is thriving. We all settled in as I like to say. I’m not afraid to share either. It’s not that. I have my reasons. Ones that…

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Seeing the Best in Others: A Lesson from Sensory Santa

November 4, 2024

Seeing the Best in Others  Seeing the best in others. Seeing the greatness in others. Letting them know.  Our non-profit Dexter’s Dream has had a Sensory Santa event for the last three years.. Occasionally after Santa and the child were done taking pictures he would ask the Mom or Dad to sit down by him. And what transpired after that was beautiful and brought tears to anyone in the room who witnessed it, which was primarily me and other family members. Santa would ask questions so kindly about the child…

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Finding Inclusion: The Power of a Birthday Invite

October 30, 2024

A birthday party invitation seems like such a normal right of passage as a kid. I remember getting many growing up.I also remember handing out birthday invitations to all of my friends. Birthday invitations were always a big part of my childhood. I grew up and had three children of my own. I had my oldest daughter when I was 25 years old, and I began throwing parties for her at age one. As she grew up, she was invited to many parties over the years. My son was born…

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