Posts Tagged ‘Siblings’
Waiting for a Diagnosis
Before we had our third baby we knew there was a chance. When I googled, it said something like a 25% chance. That number felt high. Really high. So high, that my husband and I fought about it. We cried about it. We debated. We rationalized. We prayed about it. One day I would say let’s go for it. And he would say…we can’t handle two kids with special needs. The next week I would be exhausted from therapies and behaviors and say…we can’t risk it. Two kids is perfect.…
Read MoreAge is Just a Number in Our World
You were sitting on the floor. Near me. You like to be close. But not too close. Just close enough to see me. And know I’m near. I thought before the baby was born that you might struggle with sharing me. I was wrong thankfully. You seem to have no problem with me caring for the baby. As long as I’m close. As long as I’m home. On this beautiful, lazy evening, while you sat sprawled out next to me watching Daniel Tiger, I was playing with your baby brother.…
Read MoreI am One Lucky Mama
A few days ago I had an ITP meeting for Cooper at his ABA Center. We talked about behaviors, evaluations, speech, and goals. We talked about how great Cooper is doing. His overall behaviors are down but the duration is up. We talked about holds, and kicking, how his favorite thing to work for his colored paper, and how his SDQ and CASII scores have improved. We chatted about emotional problems, hyperactivity, peer problems and so on. These meetings are required for him to maintain services. They are important. They…
Read MoreA Second Child Changed So Much
We’ve lived with autism for four years, some days it feels much longer. I’ve always wanted kids, wanted what you see on TV, in magazines and what your parents teach you. A boy and a girl. A perfect family. But what is perfect? Four years ago we had our first child, a gorgeous little boy that melted our hearts with his wonderful smile and infectious laugh. However, from a very young age things never felt right. He slept for an hour at the most at any one time, refused to…
Read MoreBrother, I don’t Understand Autism
I don’t understand you Cooper. And I really don’t understand autism. Do you know that I used to think autism was an actual thing. Like an object. Mom would say you have autism. And you’d get a cookie. Or get to have your Kindle at dinner. And I’d want autism too. Only, I didn’t have it. I was the different one. Mom and dad always say that they don’t have to worry about me. I guess because I don’t have autism. And I guess because I talked. And potty trained…
Read MoreHow do I Explain Autism…
I’ve been thinking about this for a long time. How would I explain my autism world to someone with no experience with autism? I have two sons, ages 3 and 5. They both have moderate autism with severe communication delays. From a distance, or through filtered Instagram pictures, my sons look perfectly normal. Their disability appears discrete and insignificant to the untrained eye. How debilitating could it be? It’s absolutely devastating and almost invisible at the same time. My sons are verbal and I thank God for that. A verbal…
Read MoreThe Best Big Brother
My son Xander has always been an amazing kid, above average in every way, but he goes above and beyond as a big brother. He wanted a little sister more than anything. He actually asked Santa! When we told him we were pregnant he was over the moon. He wanted a book that took him week by week thru the pregnancy and he read it more than once. He helped choose her name, he picked clothes and helped us set up her nursery. My favorite memory is at night he…
Read MoreIt Will Always Be Like This
It was a normal Monday afternoon. My boys were playing while I finished up my work on the computer. I closed the Macbook and started thinking about dinner when I heard a large thud followed by crying. My 20 month old had fallen off the toddler bed and hit his head. He was bleeding and a bump was forming. As I was trying to check it better and hold an ice pack on it, my sweet baby stopped breathing. He’d done this before. He gets so mad and screams and…
Read MoreMy Sons have Autism
Those 4 words are just words, yet hold so much meaning to me. In February of 2018, my son who was 19 months old at the time, was diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder, Mixed Receptive-Expressive Language Disorder and Global Development Delay. And 6 months later my older son, 9 years old at the time, was diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder, Generalized Anxiety Disorder and Social Pragmatic Language Disorder. My now 10 year old was diagnosed with ADHD-combined type in 2014. Nobody explained to me then I’d be fighting the battle…
Read MoreSiblings, But Really Two Only Children
I’m an only child. It’s a state of life that I know well, but have always wanted a sibling. Don’t get me wrong, there are many, many benefits of being an only child. And when speaking to those that aren’t, they’ll often “wish” they were one or talk about how frustrating their siblings are. The benefits are the obvious ones: you get all of the focus of your parents, you often get more material things, you don’t have to share, there is very little fighting as there’s no one to…
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