Posts Tagged ‘Autistic’
Every Autism Mama
I’d like to take a moment, and introduce you to an autism mama. You’ve seen her before, pushing a cart in the grocery store, or holding hands with a teenager in the parking lot. She usually looks tired. Maybe her mouth is pressed into a thin line, her skin a papery white. This autism mama, she might come across as impatient, or abrupt at times. Try not to take it personally. She has formed a kind of shell, you see—a layer to protect herself against well-meaning comments about behavior and…
Read MoreAn Apology to My Children
To my children – my little marvels, I am writing you this letter to tell you how sorry I am. But first and foremost I want you to know that I love you. You may already know by the time you read this that I am not the best communicator. I am generally quite articulate, I use long words and I can talk about complex issues. However, I am not good at making general conversation and I do not find it easy to talk about my feelings. Both of these…
Read MoreSomewhere in the Middle Of Hope
Most days you can find me somewhere in the middle of hope at the intersection of not knowing what I’m doing nor where I’m going. This is the life I’ve grown accustomed to-the autism life. Covid-19 isn’t my first “new normal” receiving an autism spectrum disorder diagnosis for my son three years ago was. In an instant our priorities and responsibilities changed, our entire world was rocked as we knew it by autism. My son Stalen was diagnosed on the spectrum at twenty-one months. He is considered non-verbal. Today, he is a…
Read More“You Need To Calm Down”
Yesterday I decided we needed to get out for one last summer weekend…take a chance with masks, and take a chance with the world. Going out is never simple. Johnny’s mood, my mood, his little sister’s mood, are all factors. For Johnny it’s the hardest, he finds the world difficult. It’s uncomfortable and unpredictable. We went to an outdoor mall that has a farmers market in the summer. As always, there were ups and downs but it was good. We bought veggies and treats. We wandered and spent time together.…
Read MoreA Perfect World For My Son
I think a lot about the things that make this kid happy. And bring him joy. Because for a lot of years, the list was pretty small. It’s gotten bigger though, thankfully. If I was to build a world for him, one that was entirely for him…what would it look like? Well, it would be full of color. Bright reds and blues and yellows. Our clothes would all be bright too. Our houses and the objects inside as well. Music would always be playing. Happy, fun, LOUD music. We would…
Read More“Looks Like You Had A Great Time”
Today our family went for a boat ride. When we finally docked after being on the water for a few hours, a sweet older gentleman walked by, saw our three adorable kids and said…’looks like you had a great time?!’ Jamie and I both looked at him and said unanimously…’oh no! It was awful.’ But we said it with a smile and a laugh and the man couldn’t help but laugh with us. See, it was 57 degrees, windy, cloudy and cold. I had thought it would be a beautiful…
Read MoreBeautiful Butterfly
Dear Hunter, I know we’ve never met, but I read about your mama. I felt very sad inside, like something was spinning and turning. First thing I want to say is your mama, she loved you. That is the most important thing to keep in your mind and your heart during the hard days ahead. She fought for you, and learned from you. See, even though you are only six, you are a great teacher. Most people with autism are, you know. Six is a good age. Six is when…
Read MoreTo Any Special Needs Parent Who’s Having One Of Those Days
Dear Special Needs Parent, I know some days are tough. You are beaten down. Your child is having a meltdown. Your teenager is having challenges at school and your young adult is desperately trying to be placed in a job or find somewhere to live. No matter what the obstacle is, we’ve all been there, special need parent or not. We want to run away at times because we wonder to ourselves “Will it get better? CAN it get better?” Your son can’t be bathed because of the texture of…
Read MoreAll I’ve Been Told
Oh, he’s not talking yet? Kids do things in their own time, there’s no need to worry. Don’t rush to label him. A label could hold him back in life. You need to do something to get him sleep. You should let him cry. Maybe try co-sleeping. Oh, co-sleeping is very bad. He’ll eat when he’s hungry. Don’t tell everyone he has autism. People will judge him for it. You look tired. Have you tried essential oils? Have you looked into a gluten-free diet? Have you considered horse therapy? He…
Read MoreMy Dream for a Better Tomorrow
I dream of a world where Autistic is put in the special skills and strengths section of a CV and not the medical section. The knowledge should already exist that we have additional needs, we shouldn’t have to specify it on a form as a disability or disorder. Here is why the word Autistic should be respected, admired and in some cases envied. I cannot emphasize enough how much autistic people have shaped this world and provided global changing technology, medicine, knowledge, understanding of the unknown, detailed analysis of countless…
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