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She Has A Friend
When my daughter began her new school, I was hopeful. I knew there would be some learning and life skills but if I am being honest what I really wanted most for her was a friend. Of course, I wanted her to learn and to become more independent and all those things are happening, but a friend was something I wanted for her. My daughter does not have sleepovers or go to the mall with a friend. She does not talk on the phone (is that still a thing?) but…
Read MoreThe First Time I Heard Autism
Hot, sweaty, and out of breath in the middle of winter I sat in a full doctor’s office lobby. Due to construction, the area we were in held patients waiting for the pediatricians as well as those waiting for gynecologists. It was packed. My newly two year-old son would not hold still while we waited. I chased him around the room and brought him back to his chair over and over. The waiting area wasn’t enclosed and there were stairs nearby. Not ideal. Names were being called one by one…
Read MoreLittle Big Things
When I share my son’s autism, my favorite parts to share are the little big things. The moments that happen that are so huge, yet so subtle, that sometimes I don’t realize they happened until hours later. Like this morning. At 3 am. When I was awake with a toddler who refuses to develop a love for sleep like her mama. My son Cooper is 11 years old. A tween. A soon to be sixth grader. He loves bullet trains, his grandparents, and episodes of Family Feud. He wants to…
Read MoreFinding Cooper’s Voice Brunch: A Place I Belonged
The kind of isolation I feel as the mom to an autistic child is hard to explain. For me it is not always being alone or being ostracized by others. I grew up one of six kids. I can handle alone because it was my sanctuary as a child. This is different. I remember before we even knew it was autism, I began searching. Searching for what was happening. Instead of enjoying play groups or church, I was anxiously watching my son behave differently than the other toddlers. I would…
Read MoreOur Wilderness Trip to the Wisconsin Dells
A few days ago, our family returned from our first ever Spring Break vacation. Because we are unable to fly right now (it’s a huge goal for Cooper but he’s not there ‘yet) we decided to visit the Wisconsin Dells. A destination about 3 hours away from us that has the best waterparks. All three of our boy’s love swimming and it’s an activity that we can all do together. And our absolutely hands down favorite place to stay and swim in the Dell is The Wilderness Resort. For many…
Read More7 Signs of Caregiver Burnout
Hi, my name is Kate and I am a mom with caregiver burnout. Some of you may shake your head at that. You don’t believe me. How can a mom be a caregiver to their child? Is that even a thing? A mom is a mom and caring for their child is in the job description. I agree but caring for a child with severe autism is so much more. It’s an up all night, never sit down, zero to life journey. I have 2 children. Cooper, my first born, is…
Read MoreMy Worry as an Autism Mom and Why It Never Rests
Parenting a child with special needs is so much more than helicopter parenting. It is never taking your shoes off, being ready to run, casing every room, knowing every exit and danger, being drenched in sweat, never sitting, searching your child’s body for marks or bruises, up all night worrying, parenting. It consumes me at times. And deep down I worry that it is destroying me. It’s not like it happened overnight. It was an evolution. I am a pretty chill person. My kids fall and I wait for the…
Read MoreRamblings of an Autism Mom Around Acceptance
My favorite topic to blog about! I’ve been noticing a trend. Every morning for the past few weeks I wake up to dozens of emails from parents looking for hope, help and guidance. I TOTALLY UNDERSTAND. I did the exact same thing when Cooper was younger. I would stay up late…usually after some sort of meltdown or a particularity hard day. And I would search for a blog where the child reminded me of Cooper. And I would reach out. And in a really weird way I would feel guilty…
Read MoreDear Mom, I Read Your Letter Today
A few days ago I shared a letter I wrote for my son Sawyer. You can read it HERE. It was a toughie to share. It was brutally honest. It was real. And I really put myself out there. I purged every ounce of worry and self-doubt that I have about raising an autistic child alongside a typical child. Let’s get something straight. Cooper is an amazing little boy. He is funny and sweet and brings more joy than I can put into words. But…it’s different for me. I am…
Read MoreAutistic Kids Grow Up To Be Autistic Adults. And It Can Be Wonderful.
Before my son was diagnosed with ASD I would frantically search out stories, blogs and articles of hope. Stories where it turned out NOT to be autism. Stories where instead of autism the child was actually deaf. Or allergic to gluten. Or whatever. These stories had happy outcomes. I did this because the stories of autism-to-life scared me to no end. I wasn’t ready yet. Then he was diagnosed and even more ferociously I searched for stories were the child was cured. The child had autism and the parents started…
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