Guest Post
The Dark Place
I wanted to share something that any Autism parent will understand. It is a place that we all have been. It’s called the dark place. I go there at night when everyone is asleep. It’s when the reality and fears set in of being a parent to a special needs child. The what will happen when I’m gone place. The how will they be able to have a life of their own and build a meaningful and reciprocal relationship place. The who will care for them when I’m not here…
Read MoreAutism is Never Easy
I would like to share something with you. Something that I am embarrassed to admit, but I think that it needs to be said. Perhaps it shows my ignorance, my vulnerability, or my true colors of who I am. When I would drop my son Brayden off at the WEAP, ABA preschool center, I would walk him into the classroom and stop and observe all of the children surrounding me. They all had autism. None of them were flapping, obviously stimming, and some had vocabulary well beyond their age. They…
Read More6 Things I’m Letting Go of this Year
Our past year has been a pretty good one but as a parent of a child with additional needs, it is sometimes all consuming trying to create the perfect world for your child. We need to… Make sure all different ways of learning are being explored when our child has trouble following a regular curriculum. Make sure we are doing all the right therapy that will give them the best chance to progress. Help them make regular friendships that they are unable to do on their own. Scaffold each part…
Read MoreGrieving the Child I Thought I Lost
The day after Mason’s confirmed diagnosis I couldn’t shake my unexplainable feeling of loss. But I didn’t lose my child. In fact, he was sitting 3 feet away, happily lining up his cars on the tv stand, babbling in a language only he could understand. Even though he was close enough to touch, I felt a gaping hole; like part of my life, the before Autism part, had died. When we got home from the assessment appointment, I dug out Mason’s baby book. The record I had so proudly and…
Read MoreGrieving Over Two Very Different Things
In December 2012, I had a baby girl but she ended up passing away to SIDS three days after my husband came home from a deployment. We were devastated and broken. Our whole family was. It was some dark times. One month later we found out we were expecting again. I said this time I’m going to do everything different. I ate better. I cloth diapered. I made organic baby food. I wanted to breastfeed. I was so scared of SIDS happening. I just didn’t want to ever go through…
Read MoreWill He be Ok?
As I was drinking my coffee snuggled on the couch in my PJs this morning, I looked at my sweet little boy buzzing around collecting all of his wooden puzzle pieces in his upside down drum. He noticed me watching and smiled for a split second before he went back to his “work“. I said to him, “I love you buddy.” He replied in his broken word approximations, “ah uv too”. It still makes my heart melt. Several months ago I wondered if I would ever hear those words from his…
Read MoreWelcome to Autism Island
When we walked out of the doctor’s office that morning, it felt like we had walked off of a plane at an unexpected layover on foreign soil. The world looked differed here. The air felt heavy and my husband seemed fine…like he knew where we were. Maybe because he’s been here before with his son. But this time, there was no connecting flight back to our old lives. It feels like we just stayed here and started our new lives, so welcome to Autism Island and wherever your journey may…
Read MoreThis Life of Autism
Dear Chloe Elizabeth, From the time I was old enough to dream about what I wanted to be when I “grew up,” I dreamt about being a mommy. A year after your Daddy and I married, we knew that starting our family was going to harder than what people made it seem. After two years of fertility treatments, many doctors appointments, medications, needles, tears, and prayers we stopped trying. We were broken. Mentally, physically, financially, and spiritually. A few months later the desire we had for a family was still…
Read MoreThank You Dad
I want to thank you, dad, for everything you have done to give me, and my sister, the best and most stable life possible. I know you gave up a lot for us, even if you don’t say it. We know. I know my rare disease of 22 q deletion, that has autism along with it, has presented itself with it’s own set of problems, along with losing your wife when your children were fairly young. I have heard you fight for us. I’ve heard you struggle to not put…
Read MoreThe Never-Ending Cycle of Adjustments
Often I think life is so unfair. Why did my child get autism and virtually no one else I know has a child with it? My son was diagnosed with autism at 2 years 10 months, right before he was about to age out of First Steps, Kentucky’s early intervention system. At the time, I was pregnant with my second son and scared to death my baby would be diagnosed eventually with autism as well. I was one of the “lucky” ones, though, I guess, because he was identified early…
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