Guest Post
From Prematurity to Thriving
My first son Nicholas was born premature at 35 weeks via emergency C-section due to his lack of movement. I thank God every day that I was aware of his decline in movements in the womb. Nicholas was pretty active during pregnancy, so when I wasn’t feeling him moving around anymore I became concerned. What was once 10-15 movements or kicks every few hours turned into 10-15 a day. I had a pretty good pregnancy up until that point. I didn’t have morning sickness at all, I ate and drank…
Read MoreA Letter to My Wife and All Special Needs Mothers
To the wives, the girlfriends, and the mothers: We haven’t said these three simple words often enough… We see you. From moment one, mother’s of our children, we watch as you push grief to the side and take the lead at the moment of diagnosis. You run like a prized thoroughbred, determined to secure therapies, counselors, and doctors. Searching for the opportunities that will ensure a better life for our babies, despite the chaos. You are miracle workers, moving mountains by sheer will, even when we, the husbands, boyfriends, feel…
Read MoreDear Stranger
Dear Stranger, You have been going to the same coffee shop as my son for a few weeks now. In fact, you have tried to engage and make conversation with him. Two days ago, you found out the reason why he doesn’t answer you, the reason why he struggles to make eye contact with you and the reason he eats the same thing, day in and day out. He has autism and has limited verbal abilities. You were told this information so you didn’t think he was being rude…
Read More30 Reasons I’m Grateful I Get to Parent a Child with a Disability
* Because there’s a fierceness in my heart that wasn’t there before. * They’ve taught me what relentless love looks like. * They’ve introduced me to an amazing community of moms and dads who are tender fighters. * They rescued me from a pointless path to pursuing perfection. * They’ve taught me speed isn’t everything. * They’ve taught me to speak up. * Because they give the best hugs. * Through them, I’ve experienced what pure joy is. * They’ve shown me the value in being different. * Because of…
Read MoreThank You For Always Having Your Brother’s Back
To my eldest son, On Monday you asked, “Mummy what is autism like?” I told you my answer, and we sat and watched an animated explanation, showing how your brother sees the world differently to you. As I waited outside the school gates for you yesterday, you saw us and came running up with your arms held wide. “Hello, Rhys” you said, taking your brother’s hand in yours. The cars flew by us on the busy road, and you mentioned the noise and how scary it must be for Rhys,…
Read MoreThe Autism Bomb
Halloween brings back memories… A lesson in labeling our children with special needs. I believe this was just four years ago when peanut was eleven years old and her brother nine. This year it was just us four celebrating the holiday and the kids and I were trick or treating only a few houses down from where I am sitting as I write these words. I was not physically far from them, because I physically do not leave her side for very long, even back then. Always keeping an eye…
Read MoreIt’s Time For A Change
I’m feeling conflicted and heartbroken for my autistic son’s future. As I’m getting dressed for work today, I noticed my sixteen year old son, Lawrence looking at all the headlines and stories in the news… My son then makes the comment, ‘I dislike cops.’ Wow. Talk about a feeling of confusion as I’m now wearing my uniform. I am a Corrections Office and a Field Training Officer. I’m also a single mom, doing my best to raise a developmentally disabled son that has huge communication issues. He is not aggressive. He…
Read MoreBattling the Darkness
There was a time our life changed. We went from ‘typical parents’ to special needs parents. Although I still don’t see the differences. We have a different struggle, but we are still parents. Autism crept into our lives and changed the way we used our voice, while we were fighting for other kids. It sneaked into ours and asked us to use our voice for our own children. Our son was the first to be diagnosed…never did we think we would take the same road twice. I think I grieved…
Read MoreAutism, Anxiety and Lost Time
One of the most unreasonable, exhausting, and heartbreaking sides of autism is anxiety. Sometimes it falls under the ever-broadening umbrella that is Autism Spectrum Disorders, and sometimes you face anxiety as one of many comorbid diagnoses. In our world, anxiety is the fierce sidekick to autism. It’s the root of things like self-injury, aggression, and property destruction. It is also the thief of time. Anxiety is the reason you will not find our family in line for a ride at Disneyland, a photo with Santa, or even a burger and…
Read MoreStates Look to Put Label on Driver’s License for Autism
My son Johnny was almost five years old when he was diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder. That was almost one year ago. Although we were told by experts they were unsure, I could have pushed to have him diagnosed sooner. To be completely honest, I think I was afraid of the label. I did not want people to hear he was autistic and assume so many preconceived ideas about him. I did not want them to expect the worst from him, or love him less. I worried teachers would dislike…
Read More