Battling the Darkness

Lien 7

There was a time our life changed.

We went from ‘typical parents’ to special needs parents.

Although I still don’t see the differences.

We have a different struggle, but we are still parents.

Autism crept into our lives and changed the way we used our voice, while we were fighting for other kids.

It sneaked into ours and asked us to use our voice for our own children.

Our son was the first to be diagnosed…never did we think we would take the same road twice.

I think I grieved for my son, not for his autism, but for the loss of the future we imagined he would have.

Never did we guess we would face the same grief a second time, six years later for his older sister.

Thirteen years old and two suicide warnings later, we discovered she also had autism.

You know it breaks you as a parent when you discover your daughter doesn’t want to live anymore.

We battled the darkness, we still do.

Sometimes we see the girl we knew, sometimes we see the darkness.

The hardest part is it comes without a warning.

The days we we see the darkness are our lows.

You weep.

You curse.

And in the end, you start to fight.

You fight because no one will fight for you.

But in the fight you find company..even worlds apart.

You find other parents, people who understand you without a word.

I found Finding Cooper’s Voice and their love.

My son found birds.

My daughter found friends.

Never doubt.

And when you doubt…

Get a bird.

Written by, Lien Depoorter

Lien Depoorter lives in Belgium with her family; her husband Stéphane, their daughter Jitse ,thirteen who was recently with Autism and ADD and their son, Leander , twelve, who was diagnosed with Autism at age six. Lien helps coach a special needs soccer team and advocates for her family and others. Lien is plain, boring and hates compliments. She finds the humor and joy in the strangest places even while working a full time job as project engineer in construction. She is straight forward and lacks a filter and her life changed by promising her son a Bird for cleaning his room even though she already had half a zoo. Since getting the bird, Kiki has become Leander’s service animal and has literally been life altering. Lien started documenting the positive changes and the Facebook page, A Bird named Kiki was born.

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Finding Cooper’s Voice is a safe, humorous, caring and honest place where you can celebrate the unique challenges of parenting a special needs child. Because you’re never alone in the struggles you face. And once you find your people, your allies, your village….all the challenges and struggles will seem just a little bit easier. Welcome to our journey. You can also follow us on Facebook, subscribe for exclusive videos, and subscribe to our newsletter.

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Kate Swenson

Kate Swenson lives in Minnesota with her husband Jamie, and four children, Cooper, Sawyer, Harbor and Wynnie. Kate launched Finding Cooper's Voice from her couch while her now 11-year-old son Cooper was being diagnosed with autism. Back then it was a place to write. Today it is a living, thriving community of people who want to not only advocate for autism, but also make the world a better place for individuals with disabilities and their families. Her first book, Forever Boy, will be released, April 5, 2022.

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