I’m a mother of three amazing humans. But as a divorced mom it wasn’t always easy. I’m proud to send them out into the world and know that they will experience all of its wonders. I worked hard on being what they needed. As the story goes, I was living my life for them…the time put in was well worth it. And believe me twenty years goes by very slowly yet they grow so fast. All my babies have flown the nest. I guess it’s bittersweet my new found freedom.…
This morning we were running late. I couldn’t get Sawyer out of bed. Harbor needed to be fed. And Cooper had somehow found a pile of hidden construction paper in the pantry and was spreading it all over the floor. He wanted me to draw him trains. That’s his new thing. He finds pictures of trains in magazines and has people draw them for him. While yes, it is adorable most of the time, it’s not quite so cute when you are running late for school. He will stand in…
Christmas is supposed to be magical. When I was young, I spent hours dreaming about the wonderful gifts waiting for me under the tree on Christmas morning. My wish list was long, and my hopes were high. I even convinced myself that an old man with a big, fat belly flew around the whole world in one night to give every good little boy and girl a present. I couldn’t sleep the night before, and I was giddy with anticipation for the morning to come! Somehow as I got older the…
I took my Christmas tree down on December 10th. Yes, you read that correctly. On a day when the slowpokes haven’t even put theirs up yet, I was taking mine down. I took down the glittery balls. I took down the ribbons. I took down the lights. I stuffed them all in a big tote and dragged it to the basement with hot tears in my eyes. Autism has taken a lot from my family. One of the biggest things it has taken from me personally, is certainty. It took…
Four months after I found out I was pregnant with my daughter J, I began to have concerns about my son PB’s development. He wasn’t answering to his name, he avoided eye contact, and his speech wasn’t where it should have been. After doing some of my own research, the same thing kept popping up. Autism. I fought hard not to accept that. There was no way my son had autism. I just couldn’t fathom that. But several referrals, early intervention appointments, speech therapy appointments, occupational therapy appointments, and an…
Below is a snippet of a recent conversation with Bubba Man on the way home from picking him up from a class trip to an amusement park: “Hey, Buddy. Did you have fun today?” “Yep.” “What rides did you go on?” (he literally told me all 11 rides, in order, and spared no detail). “That’s awesome! Who did you ride with?” “Oh, I rode by myself.” “Really? Well, who did you eat lunch with?” “I ate alone.” “Hmm. Well, who did you sit with on the bus?” “I sat alone.”…
The hardest parts of autism, of special needs, of disability, of parenting a child with significant and complex needs…Well, they aren’t the parts you would think. The practical parts of parenting a child like ours, the trials and tribulations, well, you could write a book. He’s a wheelchair user. He requires all of his cares to be done by an adult, and when we go for dinner you best be sure to move all of the crockery out of arms reach, unless you fancy being speared by a fork or…
Our little girl sat and looked at our dog whilst laughing and moved in a way I had never seen her move before. That was the moment I knew. We had suspected from the age of two that our little girl could be on the spectrum but she was still young and needed more time. I hadn’t felt sadness about it until that moment. Tears rolled down my cheeks. They were tears of sadness because I knew things would be more difficult for her and it wasn’t her fault. Was…
My daughter was six when my son was born. We spoke about what it would be like when the baby was born We talked about how things might change for a short time and that it doesn’t change how much I love her and that my time may be a little bit unfairly split for a while as babies need a lot of attention. He came along and she was in love with him. From the moment she got in the car from school she always asked how he’d been…
Taking photos of my beautiful boys and crazy, wild life is one of my favorite things to do. Part of me wishes I would have became a photographer. Photos show our life in a way that my written words never could. One thing that I struggle the most with is that fact that Cooper simply can’t go places with our family. He doesn’t enjoy it. He gets WAY too much anxiety. He doesn’t understand that he is supposed to sit. Or wait. He gets nervous. And wild. So, we made…
