Posts Tagged ‘Special Needs’
The Measure of Success
The measure of success isn’t always a perfectly posed photo… Yesterday, our family of five volunteered to hand out candy at a Trunk or Treat. We expected it to be busy and fun, which it was. What we didn’t expect was 27 degree weather and sleet. That was a shock. I’ll tell ya, two years ago I wouldn’t have dared to volunteer for something like this. Because, well, we wouldn’t have all be able to go. It would have been stressful with running and unsafe behaviors. Or it would have…
Read MoreAn Early Winter
There is just something Cooper loves about the first snowfall of the year. He gasps. He points. He giggles while dad shovels. He watches intently. He even seems to count the flakes as they fall. When we go outside, he laughs when the flakes hit his head and hands. I promise you before the day is over we will dance in the snow at least once to the songs in his head. I’d tell you he loves sneaking a taste but one of you will tell me about the tragic…
Read MoreBecoming the Mom I Silently Judged
There’s a story I’ve been wanting to tell for awhile, but it’s hidden in shame. The shame is a silent one, as most are. We often hide our dark thoughts because shining a light on them would mean shining a light on all the things we silently do or say or think that reminds us that as humans we are flawed. That’s the thing about shame, in our minds it outweighs our goodness. Even when the scales tip in favor of our goodness, the bricks of judgement and self righteousness…
Read MoreAre You Aware?
Autism awareness needs to change. People need to understand what awareness is all about. It’s NOT looking at a kid who has autism and treating them like they’re neurotypical. It’s NOT saying, “oh, I’m sure that’s hard for any kid” when a parent says what they’re struggling with. You seeing my daughter’s autism and ignoring it is NOT awareness and acceptance. Be aware of the differences. Be aware of the struggles. We know you see the meltdowns and the rigid routine. We know you see that she’s not quite like…
Read MoreThe Shore
Being a special needs parent sometimes feels like being dropped in the middle of a turbulent ocean while a storm rages on. My family and I have been thrown in and are desperately trying to make it to shore. The shore is the promised land. It’s what we’ve always dreamed of. We should have never fallen into the ocean, we weren’t prepared for this. I don’t even know how to swim. Surely this must be some sort of mistake. But I keep telling myself that once we get to the…
Read MoreI Blamed Myself For My Son’s Autism
When I found out I was going to be a father, I was beyond excited. My wife and I had been trying to conceive for years before she got pregnant. So when she told me I was going to be a father, I wanted to shout it from the rooftops! I made sure to call my wife everyday at work to make sure she ate lunch… I’m sure I annoyed the heck out of her. When we found out that we were having a boy, we started to plan everything.…
Read MoreWinter
Hi. My name is Carrie. I am a wife, a yogi, a writer, a book-reader, and a mother of five. I am also Special Needs Mama with a Special Needs Kiddo. His name is Jack. He is sixteen years old. When you have a Special Needs Kiddo, the weekend can feel very, very long. I know, I’m not supposed to admit this. I’m supposed to tell you all the fun things I create for my son and I to do together—interesting outings with built-in lessons, long hikes through the autumn…
Read MoreThe Hard Doesn’t Own Me
We’re not supposed to complain. Special needs families, that is. The world calls you an ableist when you lament an ability or lack thereof. I’ve never felt this child of mine was lacking. He’s nothing short of amazing. How could someone so funny and clever and filled with light be anything besides perfection? But, boy, is he hard. Nearly seven years of eternal toddlerhood and a few words repeat themselves on the many pages of his complicated history. Developmental delay, genetic disorder, autism, anxiety, adhd. These are the tricky pieces…
Read MoreMagic Forever
Last night we brought our three boys to a green house to pick out pumpkins. Our middle son was very excited. He loves all things holidays. He also loves overdoing things, much like his mama. 17 pumpkins seems totally reasonable to us. And the baby, he was in heaven toddling along with his brothers. Our older son Cooper, well, he was along for the ride. Pumpkins aren’t really his jam. That is until he realized that the green house had Christmas trees. So many Christmas trees. He immediately gasped and…
Read MoreThe Autism Dad
I’d like to talk about The Autism Dad for a moment. You’ve probably come across him once or twice. It’s not always obvious at first. He’s the guy attempting a smile while his son screams. He is the man who holds his teenager’s hand as they walk down the street, oblivious to the stares. He is the father whose vision of coaching Little League and relaxing on Sunday afternoons sprawled in front of the football game have been replaced by sessions of Applied Behavior Analysis, and speech therapy. This…
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