Posts Tagged ‘special needs parent’
Fire Drills
Hi. My name is Carrie. I have five kids, and my second son has autism. His name is Jack. I’ve come to think of autism as a kind of symphony, if you will. There are loud cymbals, and a quiet tympani. Sometimes, there is a melody, but more often than not, it sounds like chaos. Jack hates fire drills. He always has. For much of his life, he has lived in fear of them. When he was six, he would come off the bus and say the same phrase over…
Read MoreBalancing on a Tightrope
We are on a tightrope… This week my son Cooper had three of his best days ever at school. He is going to be 10 in a month or so and started fourth grade this year. It’s a pretty big deal for him. He also had one very challenging day. Which we are all allowed. Bad days happen. But afterwards, he used his speech device to tell his teacher he was sad. She didn’t know why. I didn’t know why. He is unable to tell us. It’s heartbreaking. And the…
Read MoreI’ll Follow His Lead
“I think we can say with confidence that Leo meets all of the criteria for Autism Spectrum Disorder…” I sat on the floor of the room where Leo was being assessed, absorbing the doctor’s words…reaching with confusion for the tissue box she set out before me, only to realize that my cheeks were stained with tears silently streaming down my face. I knew before those words were uttered…before she handed me that piece of paper with his newly minted medical diagnosis… I knew. And yet, despite leaving for our appointment…
Read MoreAcccepting Our Color
This happy boy just visited his most favorite place on earth. Besides home of course. The train museum. He worked all week to come here. Three good days at school and voila here we are. He happily looked at the trains. He anxiously looked at the magazines hoping they’d have ones he likes. This train conductor has no time for Model Railroader. He picked out 7 postcards and a DVD. He wore his mask. He pushed a button to make Thomas go around the track. And then it was time…
Read MoreThe Shore
Being a special needs parent sometimes feels like being dropped in the middle of a turbulent ocean while a storm rages on. My family and I have been thrown in and are desperately trying to make it to shore. The shore is the promised land. It’s what we’ve always dreamed of. We should have never fallen into the ocean, we weren’t prepared for this. I don’t even know how to swim. Surely this must be some sort of mistake. But I keep telling myself that once we get to the…
Read MoreI Blamed Myself For My Son’s Autism
When I found out I was going to be a father, I was beyond excited. My wife and I had been trying to conceive for years before she got pregnant. So when she told me I was going to be a father, I wanted to shout it from the rooftops! I made sure to call my wife everyday at work to make sure she ate lunch… I’m sure I annoyed the heck out of her. When we found out that we were having a boy, we started to plan everything.…
Read MoreThe Autism Dad
I’d like to talk about The Autism Dad for a moment. You’ve probably come across him once or twice. It’s not always obvious at first. He’s the guy attempting a smile while his son screams. He is the man who holds his teenager’s hand as they walk down the street, oblivious to the stares. He is the father whose vision of coaching Little League and relaxing on Sunday afternoons sprawled in front of the football game have been replaced by sessions of Applied Behavior Analysis, and speech therapy. This…
Read MoreThis Is Autism
It’s different. It’s difficult. It’s beautiful It’s gut wrenching. It’s time. It’s heart. It’s patience. It’s anxiety. It’s depression. It’s love. It’s overwhelming. It’s grace. It’s tears. It’s joy. It’s appreciation. It’s lonely. It’s surprising. It’s constant. We set out on this journey six years ago (officially)…should have been sooner but doctors drag their feet. Obtaining a diagnosis requires you to spit fire until someone gets sick of you banging their door down. The therapy is prescribed but the centers won’t take you until the child is three because otherwise…
Read MoreThe Brave Ones
What is bravery? I’ve been thinking about that question lately. The definition is the quality or state of having or showing mental or moral strength to face danger, fear, or difficulty. It goes onto give examples of a brave firefighter. A brave nurse. A brave athlete. And no doubt, yes, they are brave. They face burning buildings and medical tragedies and catch the winning pass. They do things I could never do. They are brave. But I think about bravery in another way too. Imagine going out into a world…
Read MoreWhen You Don’t Feel Like Yourself
Last week I posted a selfie of my son Tommy and I happily snuggling up on the sofa on Facebook and received some lovely comments and messages. Some of my followers on my blog, Stories About Autism, mentioned how happy I looked, how content, as if a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. In fact it couldn’t be further from the truth. Whilst yes, in that moment I was definitely happy, the last few months have been increasingly tough, and I just haven’t felt myself. I thought that once…
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