Posts Tagged ‘Parenting’
The Mystery of Time
Before I became a mother I didn’t understand how complicated time could be. You know that old saying…the days are long but the years are short? I’m feeling that right now. The days are so long. Sometimes unbearable. I pray for a second to be a human, without someone climbing on me. But then I wonder how my babies can be 8, 6 and 1 already. How is that possible? I swear I was just in college last year. Most days feel like a blur. Like a race to see…
Read MoreHow Does Having a Child with Special Needs Make you Feel?
Then she said as I was walking away, ‘but how does having a child with special needs make you feel? Deep down?’ I stopped in my tracks. I whipped my head around, almost as if I’d been slapped. ‘Why don’t you come back and share with the group Kate. What are you feeling?’ I just stared at her. This lady. Some nerve. Trying to get to the center of my feelings. Trying to dredge them up. All so we can talk about them. And I can heal. That’s the goal…
Read MoreA Pick-Me-Up for the Parent of a Newly Diagnosed Child
We’re pretty new to this whole scene. We had our “Autism Ah-ha moment” about 6 months ago. My son has no creative speech, eats his five favorite foods, and sleeps sporadically. He won’t look you in the eye and he’s uncomfortable in a crowd. I used to feel stymied. I was consistent with nap and bedtimes, why was he still sleep deprived? I took the pediatrician’s advice and offered him a variety of foods multiple times, why wouldn’t he eat? Before I understood how my son experiences the world, I…
Read MoreThings The Stress My Husband Out As A Parent:
Things that stress my husband out as a parent: 1. Cheeto hands touching the walls and furniture. 2. Slime. 3. Candy wrappers on the floor, couch, table. 4. Screaming and crying in the car. 5. Kids messing around in the garage near the vehicles. Especially on bikes. 6. Hockey sticks, bats, swords in the house. 7. Crumpled up socks tossed on the floor. 8. Messy vehicles. Especially mine. 9. When his tools aren’t put back and when he can’t find a tool (or really anything) in general. 10. When fruit…
Read MoreThe 7 Stages of Special Needs Parenting
The first stage is denial, it wouldn’t happen to you, Your perfect little baby, you won’t believe it’s true. They can laugh, they can count; They’re so happy, so smart, But you have a sinking feeling, deep inside your heart. There’s something just not right, and other people see, ‘Oh look at how she moves her hands!’ And ‘It’s like she can’t hear me’ You mention it to someone, they say ‘No, I don’t think so’ But time passes and even they see the signs starting to show. Stage 2 is realisation that…
Read MoreI Need You Too
Since the day you were born, I knew that being a Mom was my purpose in life. I loved every single moment. The late nights, the cuddling, even the poopy diapers. That feeling, knowing that someone needs you… is amazing. Although, I thought it would only last for a little while. The needing. The constant. Now, you are four. And you still need me just as much now, as you did when you were a newborn…and I can’t help but wonder if that’s how it will be forever? Will you…
Read MoreMy Special Needs Truths
To the people that live outside of the special needs world. Here are my truths: Parenting is hard. So is special needs parenting. I’m allowed to say that both are hard at times. Talking about the realities of severe autism is not negative. It’s not pretty and wrapped up in a bow. It’s very real and raw. And until you live it, please be kind to those who do. I will be raising a child who needs lifelong care until the day I die. While other children leave the nest…
Read MoreShe’s Just a Kid who Never Learned to Discriminate
An elementary school friend of mine has a daughter not much younger than my own. These days, we only connected through social media and a shared love of our small hometown memories. My daughter had a major speech delay; so did hers. We bonded over the similarities. Her daughter Harper was diagnosed with autism; with a lot of speech therapy–my kid learned to form words. When Kate was old enough to learn about autism, we started discussing it. I mean, we started discussing it before three. She asked all…
Read MoreThe Great Divide
The great autism divide within the special needs community is disheartening. There are those who embrace the neurodiversity movement, who most likely identify as being autistic themselves and who have what would’ve been Aspergers Syndrome prior to the DSM-V changes (now mild autism). Those in this category tend to be proud of who they are and can communicate most of their everyday challenges and struggles. The other category of autism are those who identify as having “moderate autism”, who struggle socially like those who identify with mild autism, but have…
Read MoreSpecial Needs Parenting Changes Us Entirely
Special needs parenting changes us entirely. There is no denying that. Because the truth is — the first few years are going to pull you so far away from who you used to be that you won’t even recognize yourself anymore. You’ll find yourself looking in a mirror, bags under your eyes, either heavier, or skinnier, and not recognize yourself. It looks and feels like you’ve aged a hundred years. Or maybe you are standing in a crowded room, feeling entirely isolated and alone, and wonder if you are invisible.…
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