Posts Tagged ‘nonverbal autism’
Are You Going Through Something Hard Right Now?
Hey friend, Are you going through something hard right now? It doesn’t necessarily matter what it is. Just that it’s hard. And you are struggling. Maybe it’s keeping you up at night. Maybe you find yourself crying in the shower. Maybe you cannot see the bright side. Maybe you don’t know how you will survive this. I get it. I have something in my life too. Something I don’t share a lot about with family or friends. And because of that, that silence, it feels really heavy. Suffocating even. I…
Read MoreListening With More Than Your Ears
Yesterday, for the first time ever, my 11 year old son was able to tell me that his ear hurt. We were in the drive thru for Starbucks, our happy place. He was pointing out the address numbers on the doors of the shops. 100. 200. 300. He adores numbers. As we communicated about the numbers, me talking and him using his fingers and sounds, his little brother filled in the gaps. ‘Cooper is 11. I’m 3. Sawyer is 9. Mom is…how old are you mom? Maybe 100?’ And then…
Read MoreHappy Birthday Grandma
Immediately after Cooper got on the bus yesterday morning I sent this email to his teacher. Good morning! Cooper wanted me to tell you it’s his grandmas birthday tomorrow. He’s very excited. He also has crazy socks on!’ I sent it because he is so excited for his grandma’s birthday he can hardly stand it. Add in crazy sock day and yesterday was the best day ever for him. He gasped and danced and smiled so big all morning. He also asked me more times than I can count to…
Read MoreA Beautiful Combination
My son, I like to write you these little notes so that one day, when I’m old and gray, and my memory isn’t so good, I can remember you. Your life. And us. You are 11. You are a tween. An in-between. When you were diagnosed with autism all those years ago, and the future felt confusing, maybe even a little bit scary, I would wonder what you would be like at this age. Because the teenage years can be interesting. And autism, well it muddles the edges. There are…
Read MoreJust Hang On Mama
I stumbled across an old blog post of mine the other day titled, ‘what if my son never speaks to me?’ The words that followed were filled with fear and longing. My son was 5. And my hope had ran out. Why? Well someone, a professional, had told me that if my son didn’t speak by age four, then game over. I was crushed. Devastated. Heartbroken. As I read my fears displayed on my computer screen I had this urge to hug the old me. To tell me to hang…
Read MoreWhy Doesn’t He Talk Mama?
‘Brother doesn’t talk mama……’ That’s what he said to me a few months after he turned three. He was downstairs with his older brother. Eight years between them. The conversation one sided when I peeked in. The older brother dancing to the songs on his iPad. The younger brother playing dinosaurs. The moved around the room together. Clumsily. Interacting at times. But more often not. ‘Why doesn’t he talk mama?’ I did my best to explain autism to the tiny human who I know without a doubt will grow up…
Read MoreHappy Mother’s Day
Last night when I opened my son Cooper’s backpack I found a gift that he had made me. I cried. Which may sound silly. I’m sure most mother’s are used to getting these types of gifts from their child’s daycare and then preschool and eventually school. I’m not though. Crafts clumsily put together with love, glue, glitter and color. This one was perfection. When I showed it to him he clapped and gasped. He knew. He can’t say Happy Mother’a Day…but he knows. As I sipped my coffee I let…
Read MoreI Won’t Give Up
Yesterday was my dad’s birthday. 80 years young I told him on the phone. ‘I’m old Katie Marie. I’m old.’ When he said it we both laughed. Like we always do. As we chatted about the weather and my brothers and kids and how he misses driving, I felt the shift in time. I am old. He is older. Neither of us young anymore. We laughed a lot. Which felt like putting on an old lived-in sweatshirt that you’ve had for years. Each of his laughs brought me a sense…
Read MoreBoots
This morning, right as he was heading out the door for school, my son Cooper said a word for the first time. Umprompted. The word was boots. He said it so casually, so matter of factly, that when I heard it, I didn’t catch it at first. I was playing legos with my other kids and yelling goodbye and I love you while thinking about my day. I was busy. Mom busy. But after he said it, he paused, just for a moment. He was looking right at me from…
Read MoreYou are Special for Just Being You
My sweet boy, I’m just sitting here watching you sleep. I often do this, just so you know. I sneak in your room and quietly sit on the bed near you. Someday I’m sure you’ll tell me I’m creepy with your speech device. Or maybe even say it. Secretly, I can’t wait. I can’t wait for that simple normalcy. But until then, this mama ain’t stopping because I like to watch you sleep and imagine what you are dreaming about. I like to rub your hair and snuggle you really…
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