Posts Tagged ‘nonverbal autism’
We Choose Joy, But That Doesn’t Mean It Isn’t Hard
This morning Jamie and I sat on the loveseat together at 7 am drinking our coffee. Side by side. We were smooshed in. Cooper had the other couch to himself. He sat dead in the center with his treasures spread out around him. On one side were photos. To us they appear random. To him they are everything. On the other side meticulously arranged is a flyer for a local realty place, a Barney DVD case, a Pet the Cat book and the DVD, Blue Mountain Mystery. Jamie and I…
Read MoreThe Day I Will Never Forget
It was a beautiful Wednesday June 7, 2017 day. Extremely sunny and warm. Our son Kash was in a great mood. My husband and I were not. We were on edge that day. We were headed to get Kash’s evaluation to see if he was on the autism spectrum. Adam was trying his best to cheer me up, but in the end I couldn’t cheer up. No parent ever wants to go through wondering if your child could be on the spectrum. We arrived and got him all checked in.…
Read MoreAre You Going To Try For A Girl?
‘Are you going to try for a girl after this one?’ I have been getting that question almost daily lately. I get it. People wonder when they find out that you are having your third boy. And in no way am I offended. I am a big enough person to admit it. I would love a daughter. Of course. My mind immediately goes to pink tu-tu’s, gymnastics, prom, and being the mother-of-the-bride. My world right now is mud, dirt, Nerf Guns, Legos and poop. Yes, poop. It’s wonderful and amazing.…
Read MoreWhat Would Cooper Want?
We met with Cooper’s social worker yesterday for another 6-month evaluation. If you follow our journey, you are probably noticing the uptick in medical appointments and evaluations. It seems to always work like that in our world. It is all or nothing. We will have a few quiet months and then boom. It feels like every day there is something. Evaluations are inevitable when you have a child with needs. We meet every three months for one area, every six months for another and bigger, more meaningful evaluations are yearly.…
Read MoreWhen Time Seems to Stand Still
I went for a walk tonight with my dogs. Like I try to do every night. It’s my sanity after long days. As I was walking I took note of four house being built down the road from mine. So much change. I let myself think about the house we moved into just a month ago and how I plan to live here the rest of my life. No joke. I’ve told Jamie he will have to carry my dead body out of here. I let myself think about our…
Read MoreI Can’t Dwell On The Fears
It was no surprise to me. I mean, I didn’t even cry. Maybe I even zoned out a little bit. I heard him say, “What we are looking at is Autism Spectrum Disorder.” In my mind I was still thinking about why in the world playing with a baby is an important part of these assessments. He went onto say, “I am writing his prescription for 10 hours of TSS and 3 hours of BSC weekly.” I mean my son has never even played with a baby doll. Why would…
Read MoreI am His Person and He is Mine
My son Cooper is always with me. Always in the same room. Always near me. We move throughout the house together. He’s my little shadow. Never doing what I’m doing. Just always near. He sits outside the bathroom door. He waits for my shower to be over. The kid that seems to be oblivious to almost everything knows where I am at all times. When I’m gone he asks for me. He waits on the porch. Or near the door. He asks for me with his speech device…’I want mom.’…
Read MoreThe Real Confessions of Special Needs Parents
Parenting is hard. I think we can all agree on that. You are raising a tiny little human from birth to adulthood without an instruction manual and silently praying they turn out sane and happy. Now imagine if that tiny little human has a diagnosis of some sort. Autism. Cerebral Palsy. Traumatic Brain Injury. The diagnosis could be physical, emotional or neurological. It could be obvious. Or maybe it’s invisible to the outside world. Scary right. You aren’t a doctor. Or a therapist or a physiologist. There is no instruction…
Read MoreA Letter to my Autistic Son
Dear sweet son, If you tell me why you fill my bathtub with stuff I will buy you a car. Or a real, life size, train car. Or all the Cheetos you could ever want. In fact, you name your price. I’ll buy it. I just need to know why emptying a shower of soap, shampoo and conditioner and walking it over to the bathtub makes so much sense to you. I want to know who you place each item so meticulously. I want to know why you are happiest…
Read MoreThe Power of an Extraordinary Mother
I had the honor of getting to know a family recently who has five adult children. The mother spoke in admiration as she told me that two of her son’s are doctors, one is a lawyer and one works in corporate finance. All four are married and have kids. And then there is Morgan. Their fifth. Their youngest. She is 27 and is autistic. She didn’t speak until she was five. She told me about the struggles early on. How she had to educate the schools. And navigate the system…
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