Posts Tagged ‘autistic girl’
Someone Asked Me When I Accepted Autism
Someone asked me the other day when I accepted autism. The mom asking was early into her autism journey and honestly wondering when the moment comes. I could not answer. There was not a defining moment. It took me years to come to terms with the direction our lives took and every day I figure it out a little more, but I don’t think I will ever fully accept it. I will always wonder. I am human. That does not mean I do not accept my daughter for who she…
Read MoreTo the Woman Who Loved My Daughter Like Her Own
Today is 20 years since you have passed, and the void is forever there. The love you stamped our hearts with is carried with us every day. You are forever missed. A that tribute doesn’t even come close to explaining how amazing and how loved you are. More than a grandmother. Watching my daughter sit on your lap as you sit at the table seems like the most natural thing in the world. Except sometimes it’s not. A nana sitting with her grand baby is something you can take for…
Read MoreAutism Is Autism and Your Words Can Hurt
Comments are made; often in the passing, sometimes with direction. I wonder how deeply some people think about what they say to others. Do they consider if they use hurtful words? I’ve been so fortunate during my journey thus far into motherhood. I have received so much support for the way our children are growing. Sometimes, the narrative changes direction. Sometimes, people are surprised to discover autism is a part of our world. It puzzles me. Honestly, with a little knowledge, it is blatantly obvious how neurodivergence is interwoven around…
Read MoreI Wanted to Shout “She is Autistic!”
“I am sorry. She is autistic.” This. This is what I wanted to shout in the waiting room at dance class Monday night. I wanted the moms with their beautifully behaved children to know this. I didn’t want Lexi’s behavior to come across as me being an awful parent, or to view Lexi as a naughty girl. I wanted to give the behavior an excuse. I stayed silent. I did not share that she had autism. I did not justify her behavior. I let them think what they wanted. Whether…
Read MoreI Dreamt I Had a Conversation With My Non-speaking Daughter
Last night I had a dream I had a conversation with my daughter. She is four years old, autistic, and non-speaking. Her little voice has been on my mind lately. As her age and receptive language, her understanding of language, had gone up so has her frustration. I think often about how hard she works to communicate her needs, wants, and feelings. She is an excellent communicator. I often wonder what it would be like to know how she is feeling, what she really wants me to know. I think…
Read MoreHer Anxiety and Fourteen Steps
There are fourteen steps leading to the second story bedroom. Fourteen. That doesn’t seem like a huge number, but in our world, it is. My daughter Samantha is a brilliant, happy, loving, and beautiful 13 year old girl who was born with CHARGE Syndrome, and later diagnosed with Autism. She doesn’t speak much, and not many people can understand the words that she uses, but I can. She is not a typical teenage girl, she doesn’t understand make-up, Snap Chat, or why it’s important to have so many friends. She…
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