Posts Tagged ‘autism acceptance’
The Kindness of a Mom who Gets it
My husband’s team lost their football game Friday night. It was a tough loss to a rival and I know many people would love to forget it ever happened, but something wonderful happened at that game that I hope I never forget. I was tired and almost didn’t go. It had been a long week at school, but I felt guilty for missing last week’s game. Eli reconfirmed my decision to go when I told him we were going bye bye and he replied, “football?” The fact that he remembered…
Read MoreI Will Carry Cooper Mama
When Sawyer was three he asked me if we could go to a fair. I of course said…’yes, but we have to wait until summer.’ Per the usual he said to me…’can my brother go?’ I told him no. His face immediately fell. ‘Cooper can’t go with us buddy.’ I went onto explain how the fair will be too scary for him. ‘Too many sounds and people for Cooper.’ He thought about that for a minute and then looked up at me and said….’is that because he has autism?’ And…
Read MoreThank You to the People Who See My Son
I want to thank the people who see my son. The people who ask how he is doing. Who on a Facetime say, ‘Let me see the boys. And Cooper too.’ Because while Sawyer and Harbor are demanding to talk and be seen, Cooper is not. Thank you to the people who wave to him on the street and say hi without needing a response. Who talk to him, even though they know he won’t answer back. Who aren’t afraid of his protesting at the park and instead ask him…
Read MoreI Wish We Didn’t Have to Fight
Sometimes I wish we didn’t have to fight; fight for services, for inclusion, for equality. But I know that is not the case. We will always have to fight because my 4 year old, nonverbal son diagnosed with autism will never be fully accepted by everyone, and that makes me so incredibly sad. I am reminded of this from time to time and every time it stings. This week I was reminded again how the neurotypical world doesn’t quite understand and accept my son. Franklin has been in an Early…
Read MoreI Was So Scared of Different
I used to be so scared of different. Of standing out. I preferred to blend in. Not rock the boat. But you kid. You changed all that. You were born to stand out. To be different. When you were little I’d get so scared. The fear would paralyze me. We’d be in a waiting room or at a park. Everyone else would be sitting. Or playing quietly. You’d be flapping. Or making happy noises. Moving chairs. Eating sand. Twirling. Never sitting. Screeching. Grunting. Laughing at sounds or colors. You’d drop…
Read MoreThe Great Divide
The great autism divide within the special needs community is disheartening. There are those who embrace the neurodiversity movement, who most likely identify as being autistic themselves and who have what would’ve been Aspergers Syndrome prior to the DSM-V changes (now mild autism). Those in this category tend to be proud of who they are and can communicate most of their everyday challenges and struggles. The other category of autism are those who identify as having “moderate autism”, who struggle socially like those who identify with mild autism, but have…
Read MoreMy Son, You Have Always Been You
My son I have a confession to make. Back when you were little, I used to dream about a you without autism. I was lost, and sad. Worried and confused. And I thought that there was a you, deep inside, that didn’t have autism. I would search for him. I would think, once I find that you, this will be all better. I just have to try harder. I was going to do everything in my power to get to that you. The you who talked. Who played. Who made…
Read MoreI Wonder About the End
I wonder about the end. The end of autism. And I don’t like that thing (of me) that creeps up through the night as I think. Staring into that corner by the closet where it sits. No matter how I try the thought it crawls on me. “When are you going to stop hiding? To stop running from me?” It whispers. “You know the truth: that Autism will only ever end when you accept it. When you invite it in.” At the beginning I’d always end up in front of…
Read MoreLetting Go of the Shame of Autism
I remember it like it was yesterday. It will be 30 years this month that I experienced rejection for the very first time in my life. I was beginning my grade 9 school year. After a summer being away from home, I was nervous to come back to school for some reason. I tried to comfort myself by saying, ‘Wendy, don’t be silly, you have been best friends with these girls for 4 years, everything is going to be fine. You are in the popular group. Everything will be great.’…
Read MoreTo the Parents Who Don’t Understand, Just Ask…
Last year about this time I posted a blog about inclusion. See, I am not a strong proponent either way as I feel everyone should be included to the best of their ability no matter what their extra needs or disabilities. Certainly, a child with disabilities should not bring trauma to your own typical child but reality is, my own children have had more struggles with typical children than they ever have with a child with extra needs and actually have learned more from them than their typical peers. That…
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