Posts

Suddenly, We Hoped for a Diagnosis of Down Syndrome

March 15, 2018

Life can throw you curveballs. Things can change in an instant and take your life in a direction that you never expected. My second pregnancy was riddled with endless nausea. Life was hectic, and there wasn’t time to stop – I worked full time (I managed to drive to work while vomiting in a plastic bag), and had an energetic one-year old. My belly was much larger this time around also. At my 34th week OB visit, the doc mentioned I was measuring as if I were two weeks overdue,…

I Can Feed Myself Mama

March 13, 2018

It happened today. You told me you can feed yourself. And in full disclosure…this was not the first time you’ve told me, ‘I can do it.’ You’ve been telling me that since you were a baby. ‘I do it.’ You’ve always been so strong willed. So independent. You wanted to buckle yourself. Wipe yourself. Get your own snacks. I could go on and on. You have an independence about you Sawyer that I didn’t know could exist in a child. And then this morning, I was rushing you along. I…

Maybe I Just Want You to Understand Autism

March 13, 2018

It is 5 am at my house. I am up to get a head start on my day, catch an early yoga class. OK not really. It is not that evolved, progressive or interesting. I am up because my son woke up at 3 am. He woke up giggling and has been playing his keyboard on repeat. He has been running up and down the halls, flicking lights on and off, laughing, giggling and playing like it is the middle of the day. He is happy; this makes it feel…

A T-Shirt Made Just For Me

March 13, 2018

A month or so ago a company named Sevenly reached out to me. Sevenly was founded in 2011 with the mission of leading a generation toward generosity. Based on a simple, core belief that ‘People Matter,’ the Sevenly team activated the now global ‘cause art’ movement and started creating 7-day cause campaigns, inviting customers to purchase “advocacy art, apparel and accessories” that donate to non-profits. Each campaign and every product would also create conversations. For April they wanted to do a campaign around autism awareness and acceptance. They found my…

Superman isn’t Autism…and Autism isn’t Superman

March 12, 2018

Superman is Superman. He is one of the happiest little boys that I have ever seen in my life. He is also my son. Before Autism, he was my son, after Autism, he is still my son. There is a never ending debate about curing and symptoms and gluten and all of the other crazy stuff that gets wrapped in with an autism diagnosis. Of course we have IEPs and we do whatever the hell we have to in order to make his life easier. But…that’s us, that’s me and…

I Can’t Expect You to Understand Autism

March 11, 2018

I am always in situations where I am around people I don’t know. Or at least don’t know well. I work outside my home. I am a member of a few boards. Involved in clubs. I try to have a social life when I can. My five year old and I attend church. He is also getting more involved in events every day. Soccer, groups, play dates. When I am in many of these public situations my mind will wander to Cooper. It always does. I tend to observe a…

Releasing MY Own Doubts and Fears

March 11, 2018

I stood there sobbing as Ethan stared at me, wondering what was wrong. “Mom why are you crying?” I couldn’t answer. The tears just rolled down my face as the illumination of another glimmer of possibility, of hope, burst through the room like a ray of sunshine bursting through the clouds. “Mom what’s wrong? You’re making me uncomfortable,” Ethan said in his funny quirky, humorous way. I burst out laughing. I couldn’t help it. He always knows just what to say to make me laugh and smile. I’m not only…

Breaking My Silence After My Viral Video

March 10, 2018

It’s time for me to break my silence. I recently had a video go viral. It was originally shared by Today Show. When all was said and done the video has nearly 20 million views.  You can see it here. First, welcome to all of my new followers. Nearly 20,000 of you on Facebook and thousands more visited this website and found me on Instagram. I am so happy to have you here. I want you to know this a tight community where we celebrate the unique joys and struggles…

The Moment No One Talks About in Special Needs Parenting

March 10, 2018

Remember that time The Today Show created and shared a video about me? I sure do. My world was turned upside down. When all was said and done the video was viewed nearly 20 million times between two different Today sites. Thousands and thousands of comments and reactions. Mostly positive. Some negative. Which is to be expected I guess when you are reaching that volume of people. So many encouraging and positive messages though. I’m still shocked and surprised about the backlash. I’ve decided to be more private with my…

My Girl Found in the Creek

March 9, 2018

It could have ended with me on the news as the grieving mother. It didn’t…but it could have. And sometimes the “could have” is painful too. Whoo-hoo! I was out of town on a girls’ weekend where I could finally relax and not think about autism. The second night, I called my husband, Greg, to see how things were going. He sounded a little down, but that was to be expected since he was in charge of chasing our three young kids around for a few days. “Ha!” I selfishly…