Posts

I Used to Hide my Son from the World

August 3, 2018

I used to hide my son from the world. That sounds terrible, I know. But there was a brief period of time that I felt better by keeping him cooped up. In my house, I didn’t need to feel scared. I didn’t need to compare. I didn’t need to constantly think and ponder and wonder what the future held. In my house, he was my perfect, beautiful child. There was nothing wrong with him. He was happy and that’s all that mattered. I remember the first time I realized something…

I Will Wait for the World to Grow

August 2, 2018

“Ahh. Stop growing already.” I’ve said it. You’ve said it. As parents, I think we have all said it. We have said it to our children, who seem to change every single day. Like just about everything else, that statement (along with the fact that my boy is literally growing too fast) makes me emotional. For a couple of reasons. For one. I shouldn’t say it, because I WANT him to grow. I want him to learn new things. I want him to be better. I don’t want that to…

Call for Guest Posts: Siblings

August 2, 2018

Are you interested in writing for Finding Cooper’s Voice? I am always looking for guest posts that fit within the mission of my site. Posts should be autism related, honest and come from a place of love and support. August Suggested Blog Topic: Siblings Let’s talk about siblings! I am 30 weeks pregnant and siblings are on top of mind. Tell me how great your kids are. Or about your decision to have more children after your child was diagnosed. Or your decision not too. Tell me how your kids…

Success with Headphones

August 1, 2018

I am a goal setter. I am a list maker. This is who I am as a person. Sometimes it drives my husband crazy. But, I think he will also admit how helpful it is. At any given time you can walk through my kitchen and see a list. Call social worker, complete paperwork, pay medical bill, make doctors appointment, etc. I also make lists with goals. Sometimes they are for Cooper and related to autism. Sometimes they are goals for our family. I even add the steps to achieve…

Always Be You Little Man

July 31, 2018

My Little Wild One, Some days aren’t easy, and some days the unknown future can get me down, but I want you to know something. It’s never you. It’s never your fault. You are perfect the way you are. You might always be the oddball, the odd one out. You may be called names. You might get left out, and overlooked, ignored and maybe picked on, but I want you to know something. It’s never you. The sad thing is people are too busy. The world moves too fast. People…

Autism Can Surf

July 30, 2018

Looking back over the last few months, my heart and mind fill with emotions. At one time, I thought so many things might not ever happen. My boy, Jake was diagnosed with autism at age two and has been nonverbal his whole life. Well, autism.. Then it happened. My sweet Jake is now 19 years old and if I counted the times I’ve heard through the years the things he would not do, I might have given up. As parents we have dreams way before our kids are born. I…

It Could Be…

July 26, 2018

Yesterday I picked up my son from therapy and I knew instantly that something was off. He was with his favorite therapist. The one he absolutely adores. As I sat in my car watching her come out of the building with him, I immediately noticed how he was darting a bit. He was pulling away from her. Waving his arms. And my stomach dropped. I knew right then. Something was wrong. I jumped out and greeted him the way I always do. Like I haven’t seen him in years. I…

My Son has Never Been a Burden

July 25, 2018

I received an email last night. It was from a disabled adult. She self identified that way. She told me that she feels like a burden to her family. She feels guilty. She feels sad. She feels awful for the stress her disability has caused her parents. She worries that her siblings resent her. She said she lies awake at night wishing she could make her parent’s lives easier. She feels like a burden. I read the email over and over again. And I felt like I’d been punched in…

I’m Not So Scared Anymore

July 25, 2018

My dear little one, The last few days with you have been utter bliss. Maybe I am being overly dramatic, but at least that’s how it feels after some pretty tough weeks. Although we do have one behavior getting a tad worse…My heart breaks every time you forcefully bring your beautiful little face to the ground in frustration but I don’t want to talk about that right now. Because there are way too many little big wins we are having. Like the time I pointed to your cup across the…

Not Numb

July 24, 2018

I am the one that waits. I wait in traffic on the way to therapy. I wait for the tantrums to pass. I wait anxiously during the haircuts, dentist appointments, doctor’s visits, and in line to pick him up from preschool. I don’t wait the same way, either. Depending on the situation I can be waiting for Mason to finish his play time to transition to a new activity while drinking a relaxing cup of coffee, or I can be in the process of biting my nails off due to…