They Walk: A Brother’s Bond

My son Cooper has always reached for a hand to hold when we are in the community. But not just any hand. Typically only mom or dad. He likes the comfort of us walking alongside him. Usually we lead. Or we walk side-by-side. And as he’s gotten older, he’s even started to lead more. But he’s always only an arms length away. We are his safe spot. His translator. His buffer. His armor. We help him decipher. We explain. We protect. We walk. We often refer to him as a…

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Hi Katie, It’s Dad: Words I’ll Cherish Forever

‘Dad! Is everything alright?’ That’s what I said when ‘Dad Cell’ flashed on my phone. I half expected it to be someone else. A relative. A nurse. Someone telling me something happened. My stomach felt sick as I waited the few seconds for a voice to respond. ‘Katie. Did you catch the game today?’ I gasped. See my dad hasn’t called me in a really long time. He used to call me weekly and then he had a stroke and it changed him. It changed the way he walks and…

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Shoes on the Wrong Feet, but Everything Just Right

This morning I was running around getting four kids ready to leave the house, even earlier than usual. We had a sensory friendly showing of Moana 2 to attend. Cooper was the most excited. He’s been counting down the days for weeks. See his two best friends we’re going too. Up and dressed and ready to go and saying…’DDD-EEE-X-TER’ every time I walked by. It was a bit chaotic to say the least. Packing a bag, a special snack and drink for Cooper, headphones, hats, coats, and gloves (it’s 4…

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Hope, Autism, and a Mother’s Heart

Hope. Gosh I hear that word a lot. Have hope. Never give up hope. All we can do is hope. If we give up hope, than what do we have left. In the world of autism, hope is a hot topic. Because for some reason, people question if I’m hoping for the right things. Hope and I have had a rocky relationship over the last few years. For years I hoped nothing was wrong with my baby. Then I hoped my toddler would catch up. And then I hoped that…

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Crawl If You Must: A Journey of Autism and Progress

Progress over Perfection.That’s a phrase I think about a lot. In the most challenging years of our son’s life, post autism diagnosis, it felt like we were frozen in time.Or moving backwards even. But never forward.Our son was in pain, but we didn’t know why or what. He didn’t sleep or communicate. He hurt himself and us. He rarely smiled.For years it seemed like he wasn’t made for this big, confusing world. And to top it off, the world didn’t seem to want him either.But we didn’t give up on…

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To the Keeper of My Son’s Traditions

To my son’s future caregiver… My son is 14 years old. When he was three he was diagnosed with severe nonverbal autism. We had no idea what the future held. And honestly, we weren’t told much good. When he was 8, I made the decision to walk away from the negativity. The sad predictions. And the people who didn’t believe in him. Or see his strengths. It was the best decision I’ve ever made. His favorite thing to do is to decorate for Christmas. He will help for a bit.…

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The Fears We Share as Parents of Kids with Disabilities

What keeps you up at night? That was the question asked during a presentation I was giving to the amazing folks who work with children and adults like my son. I fumbled a bit through my answer because I don’t like to speak of those things. I said keeping my son safe from the dangers of the world. As he gets older, bigger and bolder, I find it more worrisome. And who will care for him after I’m gone. Or if something happened to me and my husband now. I…

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Thank You: Why Family Restrooms Matter to Families Like Mine

My message to establishments that have family restrooms. THANK YOU. Before I had a child with a disability, I was oblivious to a lot of things. I foolishly assumed that all kids went to restaurants, and used public restrooms and even transitioned from riding in a cart to walking. I didn’t know that some children are deathly afraid of automatic flushing toilets and hand dryers. I didn’t know that some parents are unable to go into gas stations or even go through drive thrus. But the biggest thing that I…

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Unexpected Moments: The Magic of My Son’s Christmas Spirit

I’ve learned as I’ve aged that the biggest, most memorable moments of our lives, are often the ones we least expect. Of course a wedding, the birth of our babies, an anniversary, are the best. But other ones sneak in. When you least expect them. A solo car ride with your son. A walk with your aging parent. Staying up way too late drinking wine with your husband. Coffee with a friend. Or when your first born takes it upon himself to decorate for Christmas. Now, I know that may…

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The Beauty of Sawyer’s Soul

Yesterday, I drove my middle son Sawyer to school. He typically rides the bus but he wanted to donate a handful of toys to the toy drive his school was holding so I drove him. ‘The toys go to Children’s Hospital mom.’ He was adamant about bringing presents. As we drove he asked me a zillion questions. As a mom, I’ve learned that some of the best conversations happen in the car. After tell me that he has a project due this week and about something he saw on YouTube,…

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