Posts by Kate Swenson
Hard Work
Some kids work really hard before they start their school day. Harder than most. The get up early and leave the house in the dark when it’s 19 degrees and go to speech and do puzzles and practice saying words. They sit on the ground with their angel-like therapist and their mom and try. They turn the lights off and run out the door and giggle and get mad when the sounds won’t come out right. The ask for hugs from mom when it gets to hard and practice calm…
Read MoreThe End of ‘Wait and See’
“A diagnosis is not a prognosis,” a wise doctor once said to me, as I was deep in a panic about what Flynn’s life would be like. Over time, it became my mantra and it comforted me as we were transferred from specialist to specialist. “A diagnosis is not a prognosis,” I would repeat to myself often. After countless appointments and tests, I grew comfortable with the labels being thrown onto the table and gained medical knowledge, preparing myself for the day that we got the answers we were looking…
Read MoreWhat is a Brother?
Brothers. Two years apart. Almost to the day. One loves Legos and Mindcraft and hockey. The other one loves being tickled, old train magazines, and game shows. One never stops talking and asks endless questions that sometimes make me laugh and other times drive me up a wall. The other one is more choosy about what he communicates. He makes us work for it. But when he does, mostly it’s mom, snack, home and yes and no. And cookie. And most recently Starbucks. I thought they would be best friends.…
Read MoreMisunderstood in Public
Hi. My name is Carrie. I have five kids, and my second son has autism. His name is Jack. He is fifteen. Every so often I come across an article about how a person with a diagnosis or a disability was asked to leave a public place because they were too loud, or disruptive, or misunderstood. Broadway musicals. Movie theaters. Water parks. When you have a child diagnosed with autism, doing something as simple as going to the grocery store, or a Little League baseball game, can be a challenge.…
Read MoreDear Autism, Happy 3rd Birthday
Dear Autism, Happy third birthday. While it may have taken you 9-12 months to come around, when you finally reared your head, you made your point. You have brought us so much joy, and so much pain over these last three years. We cried when the doctor sat us in the chair in her office and said, “It’s autism.” Your dad and I held hands, separated by a small table housing a box of much needed tissues, and we stared not at each other, but directly at the doctor as…
Read MoreWhat I Don’t Say
Autism is complex with many different angles and moving parts…as are those on the spectrum. All uniquely beautiful in their own way. My husband and I had a tough conversation today about all the parts we do not tell our friends and family…..the hard stuff. It is not my story to tell. It is his. My son’s. Sometimes I do have to share. To his teachers, to family and sometimes to friends. I never want to share that stuff. The raging meltdowns. Sometimes over something as small as a toy…
Read MoreFinding Your Way Back to God After a Diagnosis
I just came from church. I went alone today. I could have brought my two younger children but honestly, I needed 60 minutes to myself to sit and think. I chuckle at what I consider to be a ‘relaxing break’ now. Anyhow I don’t often talk about church on this page. Because like politics and vaccinating and puzzle pieces and the color blue, it can anger people. And that isn’t what my mission is about. I refuse to argue about autism. Not anymore. I’m too busy making sure my son…
Read MoreThe Spiral Staircase
Questions filled my mind and I was unable to hear what the doctor was saying. I was sitting in her office listening to all she had to say about my three boys. The journey started what seemed like ages ago. I had been fighting to get to this very moment, but I wasn’t expecting this. It all started in 2017 with our youngest son Sawyer. We finally got a Pediatrician to listen to us and hear our concerns. We had no idea where the first referral would lead us. The…
Read MoreTo The Mom…
To the mom with bags under her eyes from getting up hours before school to take her son to his appointments To the mom sitting by her baby girl in the hospital bed yet again while she fights for her life To the single mom on food stamps who hasn’t worked in years because the calls from school are too frequent To the mom who is still caring for her son well into her old age who prays someone will take over when she’s gone To the mom who had…
Read MoreGetting Diagnosed with Autism as an Adult
For my entire life, I’ve watched the world through a porthole. Disconnected, alone. Before my son Charlie was even two, he was diagnosed with autism. At that moment, I entered a world I thought I knew nothing about. I didn’t know that it had actually been my life too—for as long as I even had memories. The story began to reveal itself to me during a talk with my mom. She said that Charlie couldn’t be autistic because he and I were the exact same way at that age. Except…
Read More