Archive for September 2020
‘Very Nice Boy You Have Here’
Yesterday my son rode the bus for the first time to school. I was nervous. I thought about getting in my car and following but didn’t because I knew it would be great. When the bus pulled in the driveway after his school day I was waiting as the big doors opened. My first question…’how did he do?’ See, as a mom of a kid who has struggled in the past, and still does at times, I was ready. I’ve built up this armor you could say. Waiting for the…
Read MoreThree “Simple” Words
I love you. Three simple words. Most of us throw them around loosely. Take them for granted. We say them when we hang up the phone. When a loved one leaves the house. When we kiss our little ones good night. Sometimes out of habit. It’s something a mother hears a million times.. over a lifetime. That is unless your child is… NONVERBAL. Then you might never hear it. One of those things that most don’t even think about. I have told my daughter “I Love You” everyday, multiple times…
Read MoreThis Is Independence
Two weeks ago, this kid asked me to ride the bus. Sorta out of the blue. He verbalized it…’H-U-SSS.’ (B’s are hard for him.) He showed me busses on YouTube. He showed me busses in books. He pointed them out in the community. And me, being the mom I am, smiled, cheered, and thought…no way. I’m too scared. He’s too vulnerable. I can’t do it. Nope. But his dad, well he reminded me how I preach about independence. Nonstop. I want my son to make his own choices. I want…
Read MoreHe Did His Best
Today was a big day for this kid and our family. We went to the Afton Apple Orchard. You know the kind with lots of noise and people and waiting and walking. And we went as a family. We invited our friends to come along as well. See in our world, we need help. We know that now. We know our strengths and our weaknesses. And our Cooper, he requires both mom and dad sometimes. We had a lot of wins today. Cooper petted his first llama, sheep, donkey and…
Read MoreWe Are More
You must be sad… I’ve heard that phrase a few times over the past couple weeks. You must be sad your son rides the shorter bus… You must be sad he’s not in the gen ed room at school… And the zinger, the one I felt like a shot was fired and received, you must be sad you will never have a normal life… These statements, they don’t necessarily come from a place of hate or anger. They come from a place of misunderstanding. They simply don’t understand. I am…
Read MoreThe Stories We Share
We are just a few weeks away from celebrating the 6th anniversary Henry’s autism diagnosis. We celebrate now, but back then it was a different story. Six years ago, I was nervous and confused. I can admit it now, but I knew nothing about autism before his diagnosis. It’s hard to believe because autism is now my life and my work. But yes, at that point, I knew nothing more about it besides a few characters in TV and movies. Henry had a lot of the textbook signs back then:…
Read MoreYou Will Be His Best Advocate
Sawyer, I am writing down the stories of you so that someday, when you are older, we can look back together at them. Sawyer, your brother Cooper started at your school last week. At first I didn’t know what you would think. Would you be nervous? Excited? Worried? Of course, you amazed me. Your response when I told you was….’now I can watch out for my brother, mama.’ You were so excited. I was a bit worried though. I want you to be a kid and not have to worry…
Read MoreDon’t Be Afraid of the Label
My son, Chase, started school a couple of weeks before his fifth birthday. He had never been in a school setting before. Had never been in a “structured” environment. That first year of school turned out to be, what I would say, just short of, a disaster. Chase was in trouble multiple times a week. I felt like I was getting a call at least once a day, and was in meetings every two to three weeks. I was told Chase had aggression and anger issues. Chase was throwing a…
Read MoreDid I Do Enough For Her?
When I found out my third baby was going to be a girl, I was really excited. I had two boys already and was curious how adding a little girl into the mix was going to be. I thought, and hoped, maybe my girl won’t have as many challenges that my boys had. I had a really good pregnancy with Grace. They didn’t find any anomalies in the womb like they did with her brother Daniel. She came on my scheduled due date unlike my son Nicholas who was born…
Read MoreFive Things I Wish I Knew Before An Autism Diagnosis
If you are new to this autism journey and are wondering how to process all the information out there, here are some things I wish I had known while going through the process. All autism characteristics do not all fit into a checklist. Many of the early signs of autism we recognized later in our son as he got older did not fit into the standard website search. Our son, at an early age, loved anything round. He carried around balls, round fruit, played with practically anything in the form…
Read More