Posts Tagged ‘Special Needs Parenting’
His Magical World
One of the things I hear the most often from parents of newly diagnosed children is…I can’t figure out how to get my child to play with me. Or, I can’t find an activity for us to do together. This is coming from moms and dads who are trying so hard. They are desperate to get inside. But they don’t know how. Not yet anyways. Boy does that resonate with me. I was that mom years ago. My son wouldn’t play with me. In fact, he didn’t play at all.…
Read MoreAs Your Mum, I am Learning your Language
Sometimes I look at you in apprehension… I realize I am a foreign object…a lost immigrant to a new country in your presence. I look at where you look…to that corner where the sun hits…and I don’t see what you see. I do not hear what you hear and I only feel what I feel which sitting next to you can feel like so very little. It used to bother me, scare me and now I eat my croissant curiously searching for the light you are swimming in. In your…
Read MoreI’ll Always be His Biggest and Loudest Fan
I wish I knew then what I know now. I was naive when my son invited me into his autistic world. I took his hand and watched in wonder and awe. Never had I entered such a space of simplicity, beauty, complexity or hard. I made mistakes. I was ruled by inexperience. I’m not sure when the breaking point came, that pivotal shift to the exact moment when I found my voice to advocate for my son. It’s more than a discovery, it’s about setting words into action. When you…
Read MoreHigh School is Over, but Leaving the Nest is not an Option for My Child
The season I’ve been preparing for the past several years is here. This is the season my autistic daughter’s peers settle into their new college life or embark on some other momentous move towards independence. As I reflect on my first 16 months as a brand new mom, I remember forming close friendships with other new moms that I met in “Mommy and Me” groups, Little Gym classes, and various music classes for our pre-toddlers. We would seamlessly get together for weekly play groups at rotating houses. We’d take our…
Read MoreThe Right Amount of Hope
I’ve been thinking a lot about hope lately. And the right amount to have. Which is a funny thing to think about really. Because, how can one have the wrong amount of hope? My son has autism. He is autistic. And that means his life will follow a different path than most. It means he has lots of unknowns. And parts that are hard for him. He has been robbed of a lot of the big things too. The ones that most parents take for granted for their children. And…
Read MoreWill I be Brave Enough?
Am I brave enough? I just left the grocery store. I only had a few things today so opted for the self checkout today. While I scanned my items, I became aware of two young men next to me. I would say they were both in their 20’s. It dawned on me rather quickly that one was helping the other shop for groceries. He was helping him scan each item, slow and meticulously. Talking him through he step. The gentleman being helped was very much enjoying himself. He was laughing…
Read MoreYou are Enough Mama
To the mama who is scared. The one who is carrying something heavy. In her heart. Her mind. And on her shoulders. To the mama who is worried. The one who cannot sleep. To the mama who is crushed. The weight of the exhaustion too much. I understand. You feel alone. You are not. You are here with so many of us. A member of our club. To the mama who doubts herself. Who researches. Who navigates. Who refuses to give up. Refuses to take no for an answer. I…
Read MoreHe’s Too Much
Do you have a ‘too much’ kid? One who has you white knuckling through parenting? I do. Our third born son. The one who never stops talking and asking questions. Who opens every drawer and cabinet. Who jumps off couches and as the parent you watch their life flash before your eyes. The one who demands bandaids for every imaginary owie. And has me pulling my hair out. This kid…when we hear his feet toddling down the still big steps in the morning we say…’and so it begins. He’s awake.’…
Read MoreDo What Works for Your Family and Your Child
When it comes to Halloween and autism….whew, there is a lot of advice out there. And have you noticed a lot of it is really intense? Like almost intimidating? A lot of it makes me feel like I’m doing something wrong as a parent. Blue buckets. Signs. Saying trick-or-treat. Everyone should get candy. Do this. Not that. What I find the most interesting about all the preachy advice is that the ones giving it aren’t walking with our family on Halloween. They don’t know what works for us and what…
Read MoreThey Walk
See these two boys? They are brothers. One is 10 and one is 8. They both have birthdays coming up and at least once a day I hear… ‘First Halloween, then Thanksgiving, then Cooper’s birthday and then mine!’ This family loves their birthdays. This photo may look like no big deal and when I snapped it, as the little brother walked his older brother into his first day of school this year, I remember pausing and thinking…this is it. This is what I prayed for. Every day. While driving. In…
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