Posts Tagged ‘special needs parenting grief’
Please Allow Me to Feel the Hard Parts
Mother’s day has always been hard for me. Growing up with a single dad and a mother who was not a part of my life, (and when she was, caused a lot of heartache, confusion, and chaos) I always hated Mother’s Day. I have had some amazing women in my life step up and try to help take the place of an absent mother, but I’ll be honest and say that nothing ever fills that void. I thought becoming a mother would help though. I wanted nothing more than to…
Read MoreEbenezer Scrooge has nothing on an Autism Christmas
A look at our Christmas present, present and future… CHRISTMAS PRESENT As I sat alone with my oldest, panting from our recent wrestling match, keeping him from darting off for the third time, I realized I was an outsider at our own family celebration. I watched as if I was outside a storefront window. This beautiful unattainable family holiday gathering performed in front of my eyes. How badly do I want to fit in. How do I wish that just once my boys could have a happy Christmas gathering. I…
Read MoreAt Least He’s Not Dying
“My coworker says to me “Well at least he’s not dying.” She meant it with good intentions I’m sure. But it stung. I was in fact mourning the loss of the life I thought my son would have. Would he ever talk to me? Would he ever go to preschool? Would he ever make it to high school? Would he drive? Fall in love? Have a family of his own? “At least he’s not dying” it still burns. Maybe I’m being selfish. Maybe I am being ungrateful. My son is…
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