Posts Tagged ‘severe autism’
It’s About So Much More Than Fireworks
It’s not about watching the fireworks. Or seeing children run around with sparklers. It’s not about the parades. Or eating the hotdogs and potato salad. It’s not about going camping. Because let’s be honest about how much work that really is for parents. It’s not about sitting at the beach. Or riding your bike around the neighborhood. It’s about so much more than those activities. It’s not about parents that are complaining about missing an event. Because I’ve heard that. I’ve read the comments from people outside the world of…
Read MoreDreading Church
I dread going to church. I have not always felt this way. I was a born and raised a church girl. My childhood was delightfully filled with potlucks and pews. I loved church. I grew up and married a man who also loved church. We had two babies and took them to church. When our first daughter, Alaina was three she was diagnosed with autism. We sat in the office of the psychologist on a Wednesday. Our known world was falling apart, but we discovered that church was still there.…
Read MoreI Will Give You The World Kid
For the first five years of my son’s life, he never asked me for anything. No birthday presents. No trips to Lego Land. No demanding things in the Target checkout line. Some of you with children may think I am lucky. I don’t look at it that way. Until you live it, you can never truly understand either. For the first few years of Cooper’s life, he really never asked for anything. He never told us when he was hungry. He never asked for a drink. He never told us…
Read MoreLiving With a Child Who Has Anxiety
New Video! I know, it’s been a while. I want to talk about living with a child who has anxiety, rigidity and unsafe behaviors. What that feels like for the parents. And how it controls everything. Imagine having a person in your home who’s hyper focused on unsafe behaviors. Who doesn’t understand social norms. Who can’t hit reset when you tell them to stop. Their behaviors are relentless. They don’t take a break. They are hyper-focused. They want to escape from your home. If you turn your back for a…
Read MoreThe Silence Can Be Deafening
There are times when the silence is deafening. When the lack of speech and two-way conversation fills up a car so loudly you feel like screaming. Seven years. Almost eight. Think of all the conversations we should have had. All the questions he should have asked me. I should know his favorite color. And animal. He should be talking my ear off. And asking me nonstop questions. It should be one more drink of water before bed. Or one more story. I should be praying for quiet. For just one…
Read MoreWe Choose Joy, But That Doesn’t Mean It Isn’t Hard
This morning Jamie and I sat on the loveseat together at 7 am drinking our coffee. Side by side. We were smooshed in. Cooper had the other couch to himself. He sat dead in the center with his treasures spread out around him. On one side were photos. To us they appear random. To him they are everything. On the other side meticulously arranged is a flyer for a local realty place, a Barney DVD case, a Pet the Cat book and the DVD, Blue Mountain Mystery. Jamie and I…
Read MoreAdjusting to Having a Child in Residential Treatment
This is a follow up post to ‘Let’s Talk About Residential Treatment.’ Margaret shares their families experience with making the agonizing decision to place their son in Residential Treatment. I never thought residential would be easy. It’s a whole different kind of roller coaster or maybe the power tower. The up. The down. Surprisingly, I find myself enjoying the “easy” parts. The day to day with just the two other boys, going to my sons baseball games, going out to eat and running errands. I can tell my body and…
Read MoreMy Son Doesn’t Have A Special Talent
We had our son Cody’s transitional IEP meeting today. We talked about the program Cody will be attending after High School and if it will be a good fit for him. As we went around the table everyone introducing themselves, I found myself torn with emotion. Here I sit with the teachers, coordinators, OT, speech pathologist, and caseworkers who all were instrumental in helping Cody get where he is today. And it seems with every IEP meeting I always ask myself the same questions. ‘Am I doing the right thing?’…
Read MoreAre You Going To Try For A Girl?
‘Are you going to try for a girl after this one?’ I have been getting that question almost daily lately. I get it. People wonder when they find out that you are having your third boy. And in no way am I offended. I am a big enough person to admit it. I would love a daughter. Of course. My mind immediately goes to pink tu-tu’s, gymnastics, prom, and being the mother-of-the-bride. My world right now is mud, dirt, Nerf Guns, Legos and poop. Yes, poop. It’s wonderful and amazing.…
Read MoreWhat Would Cooper Want?
We met with Cooper’s social worker yesterday for another 6-month evaluation. If you follow our journey, you are probably noticing the uptick in medical appointments and evaluations. It seems to always work like that in our world. It is all or nothing. We will have a few quiet months and then boom. It feels like every day there is something. Evaluations are inevitable when you have a child with needs. We meet every three months for one area, every six months for another and bigger, more meaningful evaluations are yearly.…
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