Posts Tagged ‘nonverbal autism’
Have Courage
When you are nonverbal, it takes unbelievable strength to leave your home, where it’s safe and people understand you, to go out into the world. Imagine people not listening to you. Looking at them. Needing something. But the words don’t come out. Just screams. Grunts. You know what you want. It’s pretty simple to you. A drink of water. A specific show on your Kindle. Or imagine your ear hurts. Or the noise is too loud. It’s so obvious. But people just stare. So you scream some more. Frustration rises.…
Read MoreMaybe I am Delusional
I read your comment this morning. It was mostly a bunch of gibberish. I will never, ever understand why trolls have such terrible grammar. If you want to attack me, please don’t make me decipher what you are saying. But anyhow, this was one of my favorites of all time. You targeted my looks. Funny. You went after my kids too. Mostly Cooper. An 8 year old boy. You don’t seem to like him much. Which is weird. Because you don’t have to follow him. But I get it. The…
Read MoreThe Difference One Year Makes
Our family had a wonderful Easter day. We spent the day at my parent’s house. The boys had an Easter Egg Hunt and each got baskets. Their baskets were filled with goodies. Cooper especially loved his train magazines and flash cards. I saw so many amazing positives in Cooper’s day. Ones that others outside our world might not notice. He was so excited to get an Easter basket for one. Last year, he didn’t notice. Or care. He ate treats. Yes, you read that right. Cooper used to be so…
Read MoreHe’s Just Like Any Other Boy
I was making sure Austin didn’t follow someone through our gate the other day and this comment was made. “He’s just like any other boy” It’s not the first time this has been said to me, and I know it’s said with the intention to make me feel better and reassure me that Austin isn’t so different. That he is just like any other 5 year old boy. I don’t mind this comment because it is true. Austin can be like any other 5 year old. He wants what he…
Read MoreWhat I Wish the World knew about Autism Awareness Month
We have been on the autism journey for just over four years. I remember it like it was yesterday, sitting at the appointment watching the doctor run a series of predictable tests, biting my tongue and holding myself back from blurting out all I felt I needed to say. I watched her hand him toy after toy trying to see if he knew what to do with it (like give the toy bottle to the baby doll). And toy after toy he would throw it, or bite it, or break…
Read MoreThe Day I Lost My Autistic Daughter
It started off like any other Friday morning. I was rushing around trying to get 3 kids out the door for kindergarten drop off. There was a lot of “get your shoes on,” “are your shoes on yet,“ “that’s it we are leaving with or without the shoes.” Finally, after loading all 3 kids into the mini van we were off. I parked on Varian Way the same street we have parked on since my oldest son started school last year. The kids got out and we set off. Sadie…
Read MoreAt the End of the Day I have Nothing Left
At the end of the day I have nothing left to give. You could say it’s because I have three kids. Three boys actually. 8, 6 and 6 months. One husband. Two dogs. A house. A job. A website. Friends, family and obligations. You could say it’s the time of my life. 35 years old is the busy time. My life is full. Full of laughter, love, chaos, dirty laundry, trains and hockey. And I love every minute of it. You could also say it’s because I am up before…
Read MoreWhat if it was Me?
For me, my darkest secret is that I feel, and sometimes it feels like I know, that I caused my son’s autism. And his struggles. It breaks my heart. And the guilt chases me day and night. It all started when I read an article about how trauma as a child could cause autism. The mothers were described as ‘refrigerator mums’ and if I’m honest that was me. My eldest two children were, and are neurotypical, thriving, chatty, oh, so chatty girls. My son is nonverbal, epileptic, low functioning autistic…
Read MoreThe Issues that Divide Us
I have 2 teenage girl with autism. My oldest Claudia has very limited language and severe behaviors. She requires assistance with most everything. My youngest Keira is verbal and has social and behavior issues. Our life is not easy. Lately our family spends a lot of time divided. Claudia has a lot of verbal stims (saying same word repeatedly) and some of these can trigger a meltdown in Keira. When this happens (usually with little warning) my husband takes Claudia for a ride or to go swing. I generally spend…
Read MoreMy Promise to You
My son. My promise to you. I will do everything in my power to keep you safe. I will do everything I can to understand what you need. And why you act the way you do. I will defend your behavior. I will advocate for you. I will explain. Teach. And speak on your behalf when you need me too. And if there comes a day when you can speak for yourself, I will stand proudly behind you. I will be a buffer between you and the world. I will…
Read More