Posts Tagged ‘nonverbal autism’
Am I the Big Brother Mama?
I asked you to watch your brother for a second while I made lunches. Which you gladly agreed too. The first thing you ask for when you come downstairs in the morning or in from outside is your baby brother. I heard you talking to him, like you always do. So sweet. You were telling him all about BeyBlades. And how cool there are. You were hugging him on the couch. Holding him so he wouldn’t fall. Every few seconds you would squish the whoopie cushion. Harbor would laugh hysterically.…
Read MoreAm I Doing the Right Things?
You know those moments as a parent where you question if you are doing the right things? I have them with all three of my kids. But with my son Cooper it’s times a hundred. The stakes are higher. The decisions are monumental. I want to help him as much as I possibly can. And in a way I often feel like it’s a race against time. But often, the things that will help him, the therapies especially, cause him so much stress. He also works so hard every single…
Read MoreThe View From Here
At 9 months old, I knew there was something different about Zachary. At 17 months old I took it upon myself to get him started in feeding therapy, and then shortly after early intervention. At that early point in Zachary’s life everyone tells you, “he is fine” … “he is a boy, they take longer to do certain things” and all that extra fluff. As a nurse I knew differently, and as a mom I knew in my heart. Zachary will be 4 years old in April, which also means I have been a mom for that…
Read MoreSeeing the Delays in Writing
Jamie and I just came from Cooper’s Treatment Plan meeting. We do these quarterly. It feels like monthly sometimes. Today, we discussed his standard diagnostic assessments with cognitive testing. Man that is a mouthful. If you live in our world you know about the Vineland, the Behavior Assessment System for Children, the SDQ, The CASII, the Gilliam Autism Rating Scale and the Weshsler Nonverbal Scale of Ability. All of these are black and white standardized tests that are used to tell you that your child is autistic. In our case,…
Read MoreWould you be so Understanding?
I found myself out today in the community with my six year old son and my baby. We were in a group of people. We were quietly sitting. And by quietly I mean Sawyer was bouncing off the walls and the baby was chatting up a storm. Just as kids should be. Busy and happy. It was lovely. The three of us out together. I’m stretched a little thin these days so it’s nice to get time with my kids. I found myself looking around. I found myself missing Cooper.…
Read MoreWill you just be my Mom Now?
I remember distinctively being a little girl and being so excited to sleep in my mom’s big bed when my dad went out of town. It was such a treat. It was the best part of him going on a trip. My son Sawyer now feels the same way. Last night, as I was putting all three boys to bed, Sawyer said to me, ‘Mom, since dad is gone, can I sleep with you?’ I still had a dozen things to do before bed so I said maybe. I said…
Read MoreJust See Him and Say Hello
I’ve learned so many things on this journey of parenting a child with autism. I’ve learned that many people get scared of the word autism. I’ve learned that some people think my son is deaf because he’s nonverbal. Or that he can’t answer questions. I’ve watched people get nervous by flapping or his unique sounds. Or by his silence. I’ve watched people completely ignore him. Or they ask me questions for him. ‘Is he hungry?’ Which I respond with, ‘Let’s ask him.’ These aren’t bad people. They aren’t mean. Usually…
Read MoreThe Stuff I Prayed For
A few years ago, when we started to notice that our other son Sawyer was feeling the unique stresses of having a brother with autism, I started taking him out for breakfast every Wednesday. No matter what we wouldn’t miss. It was our time to chat and relax and eat doughnuts! We both looked forward to it. I remember distinctly thinking…I’ve never done anything like this with Cooper. And I might never. My son Cooper had never asked me to go anywhere. He was seven years old at the time.…
Read MoreFriend, Don’t Ever Downplay your Child’s Wins for Me
The other day I ran into an old friend at Target. I hadn’t seen her in ages. It was the same old story. Kids, jobs, chaos and time just slipped away. Before we knew it a year had past since we last spoke. We decided to stretch our time at Target and grab a coffee and chat. One of the reasons that this friend and I initially bonded is because we both have kids on the spectrum. We met at an advocacy event and connected immediately. Both our boys were…
Read MoreDream Night at the Minnesota Zoo
Dream Night at the Minnesota Zoo is my most favorite event ever. Every year I leave feeling humbled, thankful and so happy to see so many families just like ours. There is no walking on eggshells. There is no worrying that people are judging us. There is no panicking when our kid runs or flaps or melts down. Instead, it’s beautiful children and amazing parents, caregivers, grandparents, therapists and others who live in our world. The boys each had a blast. Cooper spent his time running and looking for penguins!…
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