Posts Tagged ‘nonverbal autism’
He is Doing His Best
A while back we visited an arcade. It was a big adventure for our little family. Our middle son loves all things game. The baby loves tagging after his older brother. And Cooper, our eldest son, he is just starting to take in the world outside of our home. He loves exploring and experiencing the world on his own terms. He is eleven years old. He loves trains and postcards with animals on them. He also has autism. He is autistic. And according to some, nonspeaking. But he has so…
Read MoreHe’s the Center of this Home
When it’s just Cooper and his dad and I, the house is pretty quiet. No brothers fighting for attention. No talk of monster trucks in mud or hockey practice. No little sisters babbling and cooing. Well, I mean, Blue Mountain Mystery is usually singing from an iPad and I’m constantly saying, ‘turn it down Cooper.’ But besides that, it’s pretty quiet. You will hear an occasional laugh and giggle. A gasp. A question from me. But chatter back and forth…nope. Cooper is eleven years old. On paper his diagnosis is…
Read MoreTo the People Who Live Outside Our World
To people who live outside of our world: I have a favor to ask you. When you see that child screaming uncontrollably on the floor of the supermarket. Stop. Pause. And… Before you blame the parents, Before you shake your head in disgust, Before you make snide comments about lack of discipline, And most importantly, before you judge the child, Stop. And know that… You may be seeing autism at its most challenging. It’s most confusing. A child who may simply have seen, heard, or smelled something new and not…
Read MoreLean In
Sometimes I will be sitting in my living room, or taking a shower, or driving in my car, and all of a sudden feel a crippling fear. It will come out of nowhere almost consuming my thoughts. Paralyzing me. I will feel it so strongly that I will clutch my stomach or bring my hand to my head, as if trying to wipe away the worry. Cooper. My son. I’ll see a flash of his future. A glimpse twenty years from now. It’s not fear of the diagnosis. Or the…
Read MoreCome Back to Me
“Come back to me…come back to me…” I mutter as I hold my daughter who is once again slipping into the unknown. The only words that come to my mind as I rock my beautiful little angel in my arms. You see there is a tantrum, and then there is a meltdown. Since the months of Avery’s diagnoses they occur less often, but when they do it is as if my soul is ripped out of my body, chasing into the battlefield after her. There is simply no other way…
Read MoreWhen You Hear Autism for the First Time
Did you fear the word autism the first time you heard it in relation to your child? This morning, I was asked why I feared the word autism in the beginning. The question came from an autistic gentleman in a completely non-judgmental way. I’m thankful he asked. It’s one of those questions that pushes me out of my comfort zone. One that prompts me to look inside myself. Look back. Be honest. And learn. When I heard the word autism for the first time in relation to Cooper, I was…
Read MoreA Story of Hope-Pre-order Forever Boy Today
An excerpt from chapter 9 of Forever Boy: When the professionals first told me about autism, they described it to me as a spectrum. I immediately thought of a spectrum of light, like a rainbow through a prism. But it wasn’t that kind of spectrum. Or at least the experts didn’t explain it that way. They described it as a long line, with one end being the most severely affected and the other end being less affected. They threw terms at me like high-functioning, low-functioning, severe, moderate, and mild, even…
Read MoreCommunication can be so Beautiful
A beautiful moment to share with you… This morning, when I came out of my bedroom, far earlier than I would have liked, I knew my Cooper was waiting on the stairs for me. For one I could hear train whistles and happy music. And secondly, lately, he’s been waiting for me more. Near, but far. Not close enough to touch, but easily heard and seen if I peek around a corner or under a table. He gasped as he usuallly does when it’s been a period of time since…
Read MoreDifferent is Amazing
Parent: I wish my autistic child could talk to me. Parent: I wish my child with autism could communicate with me. Parent: I wish I knew what my nonverbal child was thinking. Parent: I wish I knew what my child loved. Child: Listen and I will show you in the most mysterious ways. Be prepared to wait. And to listen to more than just words. My son Cooper takes photos with his iPad. Hundreds and hundreds a day. I know because the iPad is linked to my iPhone and every…
Read MoreHe Taught Me How to Truly Listen
A few days ago I was driving myself and my three sons home from my mom’s house in Wisconsin. We had just celebrated Christmas and my SUV was packed to the brim with toys, leftovers, and love. The sky was dark as I navigated the backroads I’ve driven home for 30-some years. I remember being a little girl and dozing as my parent’s car bounced over the same bumpy roads. Only this time I was the parent, and I had two sleeping boys in the seat behind me, and one…
Read More