Posts Tagged ‘autism mom’
Light at the End of the Tunnel
The comment read, ‘for some families, there is no light at the end of the tunnel.’ I thought about it all night. And when my toddler woke up at midnight for a hug, and then again while I drank my coffee and watched the news. I thought back to our hardest days when there was no apparent light at the end of the tunnel. Our autistic son didn’t sleep longer than 45 minutes at a time and we started every day at 3 am. We lived in this place of…
Read MoreWe Figured it Out
I don’t consider myself to be an expert in parenting. Or an expert in anything really. I don’t always do the right thing or handle every bump in the road perfectly. I didn’t fall gracefully into autism when my first born son was diagnosed at age 3. I more so crashed. Head first. With zero guidance. They say help is readily available for families like mine. Let’s be clear here. It wasn’t. We figured it all out on our own. Maybe it’s different now. I pray that it is. Because…
Read MoreIt Wasn’t You
My son, This morning you happily went to school. That sentence right there. I felt the tears pooling in my eyes as I typed it just seconds ago. Happily. Went. School. You put your own shoes on, brought me your coat, gathered up your treasures, picked up your backpack, and waited calmly by the door. It was 8:16 am. You know the bus comes at 8:23. You don’t seem to mind waiting. Your little brother waits with you, although I don’t think he necessarily brings you peace. But you appease…
Read MoreIt’s Different for the Dads
I imagine it’s different for the dads. The dads like my husband. Last night I sat in the bleachers of a cold hockey rink watching my middle son play hockey. I glanced back behind me and took note of all the dads standing in a row. My husband was sandwiched in-between a group of 5 or so men. A snapshot out of the suburbia playbook. They all shared a striking resemblance. Middle aged men. Black jackets. Black facemasks. All wearing hats. We are in the stage of life I suppose.…
Read MoreWaiting for School
The sweet email said…’Cooper has been on my mind all day! How was his first day back to school?’ I’ll admit I teared up a bit as I read her words. The kindness of strangers continues to amaze and humble me. And she wasn’t the only one who asked about him. There were dozens of emails and messages asking how he did. Cooper had a fantastic day at school! I was a bit nervous this morning because somewhere wires got crossed and his bus never came. He was dressed and…
Read MoreTheir Special Bond
This morning we were running around getting three kids ready to leave the house. Packing lunches, finding school iPads, headphones and chargers, gathering snow gear…it was a lot. We are definitely out of practice. Jamie noticed that Coops put his shoes on the wrong feet. It happens quite frequently but we are also so proud of him for putting his shoes on that we don’t mind fixing them. Sawyer, who was soaking up his last few minutes of holiday break, and zoning out watching his iPad, must have heard us.…
Read MoreThree Kinds of Special Needs Parents and the Groups we March in
In this special needs community we have lovingly cultivated, there are three kinds of people, in three very different groups. I type this only to paradigm shift anyone on the ledge of two sides. Special Needs Parents find themselves here, there, or coasting. The Gratefully Coasting Group The Gratefully Coasting Group is this: things are good, you continue with the systems and supports that are working and you look up every now and again to thank your lucky stars. The Candle Vigil Group The Candle Vigil Group is this: you…
Read MoreSpecial Needs Mamas, Don’t Stay in the Hard
This morning I was headed to pick up my son from his hybrid, half days of kindergarten. I thought about how tired I was, how much I was tired of shortened school days, and then my favorite song came on and snapped me out of my complaints. Our day had started hours before the sun was ready to come up, when the house was quiet, and we could watch cartoons and eat cereal with leisure. This was our life for so many years, two am wake ups for weeks, or…
Read MoreRaising a Child With Autism; You Are Not Alone
During the years surrounding my son’s autism diagnosis, I could barely say the word “autism” out loud. I thought I would just break down every single time and, frankly, I didn’t have time for that. To be clear, this had nothing to do with shame. Not one day has gone by that I am not immensely proud of this boy. It was about fear, worry, the unknown, and all the other bumps along the road to acceptance. All a parent could ever want is for their child to be…
Read MoreIndependence
I just had a huge mom win. I successfully bathed all three of these little monsters in the shower. Cooper first. Then Sawyer and the baby. There was so much water. So. Much. Water. It was on the walls, the ceiling, and puddled on the floor. We used 4 towels. There was an incident with a shampoo bottle and a glass of water. Boys I tell you. But all three are bathed and dressed in jammies. I feel like I moved to expert level parenting. Showering is a big deal.…
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