Posts Tagged ‘autism in girls’
Verbal Autism Does Not Mean Easy Autism
I am blessed with a daughter who has a large vocabulary and clear dictation. She can read fluently and make up complex sentences. She can remember accurate facts about things and repeat these readily. She can make choices, recall events and express her opinion. As a result of all of the above it is assumed (wrongly) that her autism is mild, has limited impact on her life and something to be of little concern about. People are too quick to assume if a child is verbal that everything is fine.…
Read MoreThe Decision To Have More Children
I had always dreamed of having many children. For the longest time my magic number was six. As I grew older, the number changed but I still wanted at least three kids. And my husband felt the same way. We married young and spent our first few years just having fun. We wanted to wait a few years before we started our family. A few years into our marriage we were surprised with my pregnancy. But we were so happy. We were finally living our dream of having a family.…
Read MoreWhen Grief Affects Every Aspect of your Life
I was swallowed into the autism pit and it almost destroyed every relationship in my life. I became so caught up in my grief that I began to become bitter towards my friends and their children’s growth. Seeing their accomplishments devastated me. I would become resentful listening to them ‘complain’ about running their kids around or how many activities they were in., etc. I would snap at them saying, ‘at least you aren’t spending your Saturday’s in therapy.’ I stopped answering the phone and they eventually stopped calling. It drove…
Read MoreMy Son, His Sister’s Protector
As my children grow, I have watched their sibling relationship start to evolve and take shape. Some days I sit back and observe them, in awe, amazed at what a perfect match they are. Other days I am playing referee and constantly breaking up arguments. I know arguments are a part of any relationship in life and siblings are no different. My children are complete opposites, and honestly I wouldn’t have it any other way. My son Daniel, who is 22 months old, is your typical almost two-year-old boy. He…
Read MoreAge Thirteen
My typical daughter, Sasha was recently in her middle school musical. When we were reviewing the performance I mentioned one of the actresses I thought did a great job. “What grade is she in?” I asked. “She’s in seventh grade. She’s Alaina’s age.” My daughter said casually. She’s Alaina’s age? My face dropped. I felt the familiar feelings. A combination of shock and sorrow. That’s what girls in seventh grade are like? This 13 year old girl..she was so..so so older, so funny, so focused, so verbal. I squinted my…
Read MoreAutism and Other People
One of the hardest things about raising a child who is different is other people. When we’re at the grocery store and my child has an iPhone in her hand, it’s not because I’m lazy. Lazy would be the last word anyone would use to describe my parenting. My child has an iPhone because it comforts her and it keeps her from wriggling out of the shopping cart, screaming at the top of her lungs, running away from me, or melting into a puddle. When we’re at the playground and…
Read MoreLearning the Value of Self Care
Self care is EXTREMELY important. It’s the reason they tell you to put the oxygen mask on first and then give it to your kids. If you are not OK, you can not help others. Having a child with special needs is taxing, extremely taxing. In years past, I was not using self care at all. I didn’t believe in it. I didn’t think I deserved it. I thought it was selfish. I thought it was fluffy stuff. So, I ignored it and actually went the other way which was…
Read MoreFriend, I Understand You May be Scared
It’s the end of the school year and administrators are sitting with teachers working to create the best classes for the coming year. I understand it’s not an easy task. This year, I sit on the other side of the table as the parent who understands that my autistic child may be placed in your class. I have even heard that a few of my ‘friends’ have requested that their children not be in my child’s class. I want you to know, I understand. Really. I do. Friend, I remember…
Read MoreThe Wonderful World of Denial-Land and How I Escaped
“I’m going to say something during the appointment” my husband said on the way to our daughter’s one-year pediatrician check up. “Why? It’s nothing. Seriously. Why even bring it up?” I said in a strong tone but really was begging him not to take our new, adorable, happy, drama-free family down a path I knew we were already on. Let’s go back one year prior to when our newest daughter was about to be born. We were holding our breath waiting to see her because after our anatomy scan at…
Read MoreThe Privilege of Being Your Mom
When you see a special needs child the focus often is placed on the hard things. The things she won´t accomplish, the struggles and the challenges. I consider this to be very unfair. Each child is a miracle, a marvel of life who deserves our respect. We should always focus on the possibilities. What they CAN do. What they WILL accomplish. What they ARE good at. We should see the glass half full and look at every child as a diamond in the rough who needs our help to shine…
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