Posts Tagged ‘autism family’
Picture of Real
This morning I was rage cleaning my house and muttering under my breath about how we can’t have nice things. For anyone not familiar, rage cleaning is something that typically happens in my home on a weekend morning, after a day of chaos, where the dog becomes afraid of the vacuum and my boys hide from me. For context, I had just finished picking slime out of my living room rug. Which I felt extra frustrated by because we don’t allow slime here. But yet it appears. Next to the…
Read MoreA Letter of Hope and Inclusion
A beautiful and heartfelt letter. Written to my son by a fellow classmate, a “secret elf.” Dear Ethan, You are a great friend. You fill the class with joy. You make our class better and better. I love that you like dinosaurs. You work so hard. Keep being you. From: Your Secret Elf When I read these words, I see kindness. I see inclusion. I see love. And that last line, “keep being you.” That my friends, is acceptance. The true beautiful meaning of acceptance in its purest form. Another…
Read MoreOur Autism Guide for a Happy Holiday
This time of year, with all of the holidays, is probably one of the toughest times of the year. The frequent change in routine, small bouts of travel, spending hours at a time at other people’s homes (even if it’s a familiar home, like a grandparent’s), change in diet, increase in sugary treats, large groups of people, loud crowds/music, can be overwhelming for Charlie. So for our family and friends, here’s our holiday guide to Autism. Charlie thrives on routine. The hectic holiday schedule can get to be a bit…
Read MoreHis First Christmas Concert
I got to be a fly on the wall again today. For my son Rory’s first Christmas concert. I told him I would be there. I went over the day with him as I do. But he didn’t seem to have any understanding of what I was telling him. My girls, however, knew exactly what I was talking about. “Mum, I want to come to Rory’s Christmas concert! Mum what are his lines? Mum what song is he singing?!” The urgency in their excitement reminded me of just how different…
Read MoreA Zoom Visit With Santa
The three boys just had their zoom visit with Santa Claus. I’ll be honest, it was a loud, chaotic, mess and had me sweating and possibly even swearing internally. It was also adorable and cute. Which pretty much sums up all of our family experiences. Sawyer asked for a Nintendo Switch and followed that up with a dozen questions about the reindeer and how Santa is doing his job during covid. Then they exchanged ‘dad jokes’ and I laughed out loud. I love a good dad joke. The baby cried…
Read MoreThe Days Are Long
We have been all together since Thursday at 4:30 pm. Well, actually since March, but whose keeping track. We’ve mostly been inside and haven’t really left the house. It’s cold outside so walks aren’t ideal. Coops doesn’t like to be cold and he definitely considers 24 degrees to be cold. Car rides are still a challenge for our family of five (mostly for the dad!) so we avoid those. Little people are very loud in cars. Dad doesn’t like loud and mom gets anxious because of it. And there is…
Read MoreThe Purpose of Genius
The letter came with the bills, two fliers, and a reminder that I desperately need to contact a random place for my extended car warranty. I tossed the trash and ripped open the letter. The words burned in my head and my vision blurred. “Mrs. Fields, this letter is to inform you that your son, Marvin Fields, has an IQ of XX and has an Intellectual Disability.” The letter went on with all sorts of reasoning for this and the need for “immediate intervention” so “the realms of hell and…
Read MoreA War With Hope
My son Cooper has taught me so much about timing over the years. And how we don’t have a set time limit to accomplish things. When he was diagnosed we heard a lot of things. We heard game over. We heard prepare for the worst. We heard he would never talk, or make a friend or ride a bike. We were told he would never live independently or have any type of self care. After kindergarten we were told he would never be able to attend a public school. And…
Read MoreA Reward for Cooper
Yesterday, Cooper’s dad and I took him to the paper store. He picked it as his reward for having an amazing week at school. Parents outside our world probably don’t know that understanding rewards and incentives and motivation is a huge deal. Something we hope and pray for! Cooper didn’t understand any of it until this year. Age 9. That also meant he was pretty hard to spoil. But not anymore. Something clicked and he is now independently able to pick where and what he wants to work for. Last…
Read MoreOnce Again, The New Normal Didn’t Have Room For Us
Normal. Such a funny thing. When I say our life is not, I’ll hear back “Who is really normal?” or “What is normal?” I get everyone is different but when it comes down it, there is such a thing as normal. In some ways we are normal, but in many ways not and haven’t been even before I knew it. I never wanted my kids to be like everyone else. I want them to march to the beat of their own drums. Howl at the moon. Sing when they feel…
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