Posts Tagged ‘autism and siblings’
My Son Got Spelling Words Yesterday
My son got spelling words yesterday. They came home in his backpack. He is a sixth grader in a self-contained level three autism program at our local middle school and this is the first time he has had educational homework type work sent home. When I saw the words, the list, tears immediately sprang to my eyes. Which surprised me. See, I am not much of a crier. I’m not the only anyone would call emotional. But, those words, on a piece of paper in his folder, they symbolized something…
Read MoreAs a Sibling to a Brother With a Disability
One day, a friend asked me “what is the hardest part of being a sibling to a brother with a disability?” Without hesitation I quickly answered, living in fear. Still to this day, even at 38 years old, I have the same exact fear as I did in my sunflower decorated room when I was eight. What happens to my brother if something happens to my parents? This is my deepest fear, one that comes with so many factors. But I don’t really talk about it. Like… I fear that…
Read MoreSawyer’s Strength
This morning I drove my middle son Sawyer to school. He typically rides the bus but he wanted to donate a handful of toys to the toy drive his school was holding so I drove him. ‘The toys go to Children’s Hospital mom.’ He was adamant about bringing presents. As we drove he asked me a zillion questions. As a mom, I’ve learned that some of the best conversations happen in the car. After asking me about multiplying 8’s and 9’s and something he saw on YouTube, he said, ‘mama,…
Read MoreThe Most Memorable Moments of Our Lives
I’ve learned as I’ve aged that the biggest, most memorable moments of our lives, are often the ones we least expect. Of course a wedding, the birth of our babies, an anniversary, are the best. But other ones sneak in. When you least expect them. A solo car ride with your son. A walk with your aging parent. Staying up way too late drinking wine with your husband. Coffee with a friend. Or when your first born watches his first ever movie, start to finish, with your family on movie…
Read MoreThis Autism Life
When it comes to parenting a child with a disability, there are parts that we as parents share. But there are some parts that we don’t talk about. Respect. Dignity. Maybe because we don’t think to share it. Or because maybe no one will believe us. Or it’s just our norm. This morning I found myself doing something that me and my husband do daily with our son Cooper. We don’t talk about it anymore, unless there is something of note. He is 11 years old and has a diagnosis…
Read MorePerfect Night
Tonight was one of those perfect nights. Beautiful weather. Sunshine. Heat. To get this baby out we went to the park. Our park. The one we’ve been going to since we just had Cooper. And now three boys. And soon one more. We moved slower than snails. Backwards sometimes. Any animal that may have been near retreated at the sound of us coming. Cooper looked for whales and penguins. Sawyer asked me questions about how said baby is coming out. And about hospitals and labor. He’s a little nervous about…
Read MoreI’m Lucky Enough to be Your Mom
My Dearest Nicholas, You made me a mother six years ago. My first Mother’s Day was spent in the NICU. You came into this world with a number of challenges. Swallowing issues, developmental delay, sensory difficulties, non-verbal Autism, a rare genetic mutation, the list goes on. Despite not being able to talk, as your mother, I still know exactly what you want. I know when you point toward the kitchen counter, you need a tissue from the Kleenex box. I know when you bring me your tablet, you want to…
Read MoreHe’s My Brother
These two had it out last night. Like brothers have been known to do. It was over an iPad. There was a truck involved too. Lots of screaming and wrestling. They were eventually separated. One was put in the bath and told me the whole story, nonverbally of course. He asked for hugs and kisses as his alligator tears filled the tub. The other one, the tough guy, he didn’t need a hug or a kiss. But he did tell, and by that I mean yell, his side of the…
Read MoreMy Brother Jack
I was surprised when I found out my brother Jack has autism. To me he wasn’t weird or odd. That was just him. He always asks a lot of questions, like what color shampoo people used. He asked that one so much that I thought it was something people usually asked each other in a conversation. He gets mad sometimes. He gets mad when there is too much noise. He puts his hands over his ears and screams. He worries a lot. After I found out about his autism, I…
Read MoreThe Autism Bomb
Halloween brings back memories… A lesson in labeling our children with special needs. I believe this was just four years ago when peanut was eleven years old and her brother nine. This year it was just us four celebrating the holiday and the kids and I were trick or treating only a few houses down from where I am sitting as I write these words. I was not physically far from them, because I physically do not leave her side for very long, even back then. Always keeping an eye…
Read More