Last night something monumental happened in our little world. Our middle son Sawyer had a gaggle of friends over playing and as they ran from room to room, crashing and bashing and giggling about farts and butts, our oldest son Cooper ran behind. He was the oldest of the whole group on paper. The big brother and yet not. He will be 11 in a few months. But he has no interest in Nerf Guns or ninja warrior games. He doesn’t acknowledge the coolest shoes or ask for a cell…
When my son Cooper was first diagnosed with autism, and in the beginning years that followed, I’d spend a lot of time secretly wondering what our relationship would be like. I was told he would never be able to talk. Or live independently. And a whole lot of other things as well. And I’d wonder. And worry. Would we ever have a conversation? Would we ever go grab dinner together at a restaurant? Go to his first concert? And so on. I’d wonder while driving and studying him in the…
If you are a parent you know that many kids have food aversions and sensitivities. This is especially true for kids on the spectrum. And it’s so much more than a child being a picky eater. Tastes, textures, smells, new foods, and more can make meal time a nightmare. I experience it with 3 out of my 4 kids and only one has autism so I know that food challenges can be universal. I also know personally that when I eat better, I feel better. I know that water, fruits,…
I saw something recently that said if you are not autistic you are merely an observer of autism. I absolutely believe this to be true. I do not know what it is like to feel the world as my children do, I am not a martyr because I parent autistic children, and I am not an expert on autism. I observe as my daughter carefully pours sand in her hair not worrying about those around her. I let her do it, even if she is covered in dirt, because it…
I want to tell you one of the lessons I’ve learned that has helped me be a better parent to my autistic son Cooper. It’s pretty simple really. It’s understanding that he did his best in any situation. It’s listings the positives instead of the negatives. Even if there are only 1 or 2. It’s focusing on the good instead of the bad. Let me explain. Tonight we went to a carnival. All six of us. Our popular social butterfly, our curious wild child, our sweet easy baby, and our…
We just had one of those great nights. One where you realize what a gift life is. We laughed and giggled on our walk. There was running and teasing and stolen hugs and kisses. There was life. So much beautiful life that I had to pause and say thank you. My oldest son asked for a birthday party and to see a blue whale. All without words. My second oldest rode his dirt bike and climbed trees and tried to convince me that he’s going to be 10 instead of…
I don’t know a lot about marriage. Even after 13 years I find it to be exasperating most of the time. It feels like work a lot. And I know it shouldn’t be. But with 4 kids, autism, an emotional 8 year old, sports, a toddler, work, and a baby…well, we could very well be speaking different languages most days. But this afternoon, watching my husband get in the pool with 15 rambunctious, crazy, insanely loud boys, I remembered exactly why I married this guy and will gladly spend the…
The Things I’ve Learned… When my son was first diagnosed with autism, and in the early years that followed, I tried really hard to fit in. Into the norm. I wanted so badly for my family to be like the other families. But, well, we weren’t. We couldn’t even pretend. Or fake it till we made it. We were different. Our son was different. Those years that we tried to pretend were the worst. It physically hurt sometimes. To see the differences so loudly. Our son is 10 now. On…
Now that the dust has settled on my book cover reveal, I want to say the sincerest thank you to everyone who purchased a copy of my book for preorder. And thank you to all of those who hopefully plan too! Sharing our story in the hopes to help others had always been my dream. I can say for certain that the beginning of my journey into autism would have been entirely different if I had found someone who I could relate to. This book will do that for you.…
I don’t get a lot of quiet moments in my life. I mean, I’m a mom of four so honestly it just doesn’t happen. My house feels alive most of the time. Laughter. Yelling. iPads blaring. Train whistles. No hockey sticks in the house. Turn that down. Is that a marker? It feels like a three ringed circus most of the time. But a great one. One that the neighborhood kids are drawn too. Yesterday I made a trip to see my dad. He’s 79 and had a stroke a…
