Let me tell you about a boy. A boy who at twelve years old shows more bravery than most adults I know. But his bravery looks different so most overlook it. He has very few words. Not much for conversation. But his eyes…they tell a story. If you listen to him. Patiently. If you don’t rush him. And wait. He will tell you. If you don’t talk over him. Or speak for him. He will tell you how he hears things louder than you. And smells the faintest smells. And…
Tomorrow is the 4th of July. A fun, typically outdoor, social, loud, hot holiday. It’s also a holiday that can be very challenging for families like mine. And put a lot of stress on us. See, our older son struggles with a lot of the parts that make up the fourth. He is scared of fireworks, although he loves to watch them on his iPad. The second he hears one, no matter how far away, he takes off running and hides in our pantry. Parties overwhelm him. Most noises are…
‘Does he understand everything I say? Because sometimes I can’t tell mom.’ My oldest son Cooper was diagnosed with autism at age three. It wasn’t a surprise by the time the psychologist said the words out loud. He had no words. He didn’t play with toys or acknowledge other kids. He flapped his arms and never stopped moving. He seemed to dislike sleep. Technology was his world. It was as if this world made absolutely zero sense to him. Severe, level three autism with a language impairment. That’s what the…
A young girl encased in a world that requires predictability and a peaceful space finds it really difficult to accept interactions unless she is the one initiating them. When my daughter was little, we had two dogs. She didn’t seem to notice or have a need to be near either one of them. Occasionally, she would allow the smaller dog to lay near her, but she didn’t necessarily connect with him. Both dogs had a sense that they needed to be calm in her presence and would not initiate contact…
One of the best things I ever did for myself was to put my mental health first and not be afraid to talk about it. Please teach our society that seeking support for mental health challenges doesn’t make someone ‘crazy.’ When I was a kid growing up on the autism spectrum, I saw a therapist for a short time due to my challenging behaviors. Being bullied in school, I would avoid mentioning this as getting help and seeking good mental health was often labeled as being ‘weird.’ Some of my…
As a mom of four, one with autism, life has many challenges. Balancing a child with special needs along with three other children can be difficult. Growing up in a busy household filled with love and laughter, but with the unpredictable chaos that autism can bring in an instant, was not easy. It was ever-changing, and they were constantly going through the ups and downs that this life can bring. I know that living this life beside their sister made them stronger and more empathetic people. There was lots of…
As I ascended the stairs onto the aircraft, I knew our decision was the right one. Leaving our son, Rhys, at home, while we took our other two children to Disneyland, was a hard decision to make, but in our world these tough decisions are what we face daily. We live life differently because my son is autistic and this world is not designed to make it easy. I thought back to many occasions where Rhys’ brother had been so excited for a day trip and then only allowed to…
‘I should have waved back. I’m sorry.’ She said it apologetically. She was young. Her hair had blue stripes in it. Braces still on her teeth. At her age, no older than 16, I honestly didn’t expect her to wave back. My name is Kate and my son Cooper is autistic. If you met him in a drive thru, like this young lady did today, you’d probably assume he’s a typical boy. He has blonde hair. His t-shirt is from old navy. He has checkered slip on vans on his…
A while back, a local modeling agency reached out to our family. They were looking for autistic children to take part in an ad for a cell phone company. They invited Cooper to audition. First, I will tell you we were honored. I mean, seriously, how cool. Representation for one. And knowing how cute and cool our kid was for two. But, I was also very hesitant. Cooper is a autistic and nonverbal. He can get overwhelmed. He struggles to sit and wait. He can be a runner. Not everyone…
People ask me all the time how they can help. Kind people. Loving people. Strangers. Friends. Family. People on this page. I speak about that out of control feeling that happens when my son starts struggling. When his big feelings about waiting or sitting overwhelm him. Or when the noise is too much and the lights are too bright or he smells something in the air that you and I can’t make out. Maybe we are in line at the grocery store. Or at a park. Or in the paper…
