Last Friday Jamie and I visited Cooper’s new school. During the first portion we met as usual, in a tiny room, with Cooper’s psychologist and the Intake Coordinator. It went well. We talked about goals and expectations. Every kiddo that starts at Fraser begins with the same goals. They range from eye contact to stopping and when asked and playing with toys. My two concerns with Cooper starting school are: I need to know that they are going to challenge him. When Cooper is even the tiniest bit challenged he…
Read MoreI can relate to this so much. Greatest fears: I am scared that I am going to die before Cooper can live an independent life. And, that he’s never going to talk.
Read MoreI had a close friend over this weekend to help us with our house remodel. 17 times, yes I counted, he said, “I think Cooper is going to talk someday.” He was so hopeful. “I just know it Kate, he is going to talk. Don’t give up hope. He’s so close.” And it went on. “It’s going to happen. We just need to break through.” How dare he? He has no facts. No medical knowledge of the situation. I don’t think he’s ever heard of Apraxia or read a sentence…
Read MoreSo as a new Autism parent I find myself muttering the words, “I freaking hate Autism” on a regular basis. Actually, in our house we call it ‘Tism.’ Short, sweet and almost cute. We always tell Cooper we are going to tickle the Tism right out of him. Cooper has been a happy kid lately. Part of it is because we aren’t going to therapy right now. We aren’t challenging him. But the other reason is that we have successfully removed a lot of Cooper’s triggers. Many of these will make…
Read MoreSo there is a big story in the news right now about the mom who tried to kill her autistic daughter. You can read the store HERE. I have been thinking about this nonstop and contemplated writing about it. And then not writing about it. This is a touchy subject that I normally wouldn’t touch but here is what I will say… I have never known loneliness like that of a special needs parent. First, I don’t condone what she did in anyway. Let me say that first. But what…
Read MoreI was chatting with a wonderful mom over at My Yellow Brick Road the other day about our autistic boys. Facebook messaging with her is so amazing for me. I can be honest and open and I don’t need to preface every sentence with, “I swear I’m not a bad mom” or “Don’t judge me.” It’s refreshing. And she gets it. I tend to be obsessive about Cooper. It’s kind of my thing. Pre diagnosis I would research everything. I googled things like, “nonverbal at age 3, nonverbal at age 4, my…
Read MoreMeal time has changed. It used to be the most dreaded part of our day. Not anymore! I don’t know what did it but Cooper is eating great, not throwing and also sitting with us during mealtime. LIFE CHANGING! And as quickly as one behavior gets better another gets worse. Meal time is better and now he has taken throwing to an all new level. Awesome. If I was to describe Cooper’s life to people I would say that ‘something’ is always off. I remember sitting with girlfriends or parents or…
Read MoreOn Sunday we brought Cooper to see Thomas the Train. Good old Thomas makes a trip to Duluth once a year and it’s a huge day in Cooper’s world. It’s also the cutest thing ever. It’s held at the depot and kids actually get to go on a 20 minutes train ride. Last August when we went and saw Thomas, Cooper was 2.5 and he has just been (mis)diagnosed with a moderate hearing loss in both ears. He was very nonverbal at this point in his life. His breakthroughs didn’t really happen…
Read MoreCooper got kicked out of therapy. Yup, you read that right. I can spin this two ways for you. First, Cooper’s speech therapist decided that it would be best for Cooper to take a break. The sessions aren’t going well. Cooper hates it there…he loves his therapist…but he doesn’t want to do the stuff she’s doing…ever. It’s so frustrating. Trust me. I leave exhausted and sweaty and questioning everything we are doing. And also thinking, ‘is there ever a time where therapy is more detrimental than good???’ Part of me…
Read MoreWhen Cooper was little and his quirks were just starting to show I silently blamed myself. I’d tell people I didn’t but I really did. I never believed the whole autism and vaccination correlation. Cooper was different since the day he was born. Deep down I knew right away. At that time I silently doubted everything I had done while pregnant. Maybe I ate the wrong things. For a hot minute I thought maybe I used too much bug spray or even used to much hand sanitizer. And then when…
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