Because of our son Jack’s autism and sensory issues, one of the most difficult tasks for him is spending time at doctor’s appointments. When we bring him, he has severe anxiety; accompanied by lots of tears, screaming, tantrums and sometimes self-injurious behavior. It is heart breaking. Now, this may sound crazy…but because of this, in addition to all of his own appointments, I make sure to bring Jack to all of his siblings visits as well. You’re probably thinking WHY?! Right? Well, I do this in hopes to desensitize Jack…
I’m giving you this baby. He won’t be like the other ones. Maybe you’ll know from day one. Maybe it will take time. But eventually, you come to realize that something is different. It’s going to be hard at first. Not the love part. That part will be easy. But the fight to figure out what and why. That part will leave you depleted in a way that feels almost impossible to explain. You will be pushed to your limits. You are going to question everything you’ve ever done and…
Most parents would enjoy looking through a crystal ball to see what their child’s future looks like. What will your child’s life look like in 10 years? 15? Their wedding? The day your first grandchild is born? And finally how your children are doing when you are no longer around. You don’t want to wish the days away, but getting a peak would be so fun! Maybe 10 years from now they will be turning 18. Will they be heading off to college? trade school? getting a full time job?…
I think it is very safe to say that most parents of children with autism are battling anxiety or depression…or a bit of both, depending on the day. How couldn’t we? From the time our children were tiny and specialists noticed they were ‘different’, we have been fighting every day of our lives. Fighting for them to receive the therapies they need. Fighting to have them included in this world. Fighting to teach them all they need to know so that hopefully…one day…they ‘might’ catch up. And this is where…
Sawyer could hardly contain his excitement as we entered the gym for his friend’s birthday party. Hockey, basketball, cake and a bounce house. It doesn’t get much better than that in the eyes of a six-year-old. He dropped his present on the table as I checked him in. I caught him just before he ran off. I bent down on my knee to check his shoe laces and give him a quick hug. As I stood up I said the same thing I say every single time I leave my…
I should be at church right now. There are a whole lotta reasons why I’m not. Sawyer is at hockey practice with Jamie. I have no one to watch Cooper. I need to pack for our trip and clean our house and grocery shop and make the itinerary for the grandparents. Anyhow, I’m sitting here, drinking coffee, watching two of my boys play, and thinking about faith. It’s no secret that my son is thriving. We’ve figured out how to help him in all the ways that he needs help.…
For me, as a mom, the isolation has always been the hardest part. We couldn’t go anywhere. And I mean anywhere. We couldn’t go to birthday parties, parks, movies, restaurants, Christmas dinner at a friends house, the grocery store or Target. We couldn’t go to gas stations or parades or swimming pools. Parents of older kids told me to keep trying. Keep going. Keep practicing. Leave if it doesn’t work. But it wasn’t the easy. I couldn’t get him out of the car. I couldn’t get him in the building. If…
A glimpse inside the secret world of special needs parenting: I was packing for my first trip away from my boys in ages. My husband was watching the game. I was mindlessly throwing stuff in a bag. Rushed of course. Drinking a glass of wine. Worrying. Rushing. I was talking through my time away. The schedule and such. Cooper has speech therapy on Tuesday and Friday. Sawyer has hockey on Wednesday and Saturday. Don’t forget Cooper’s meds. The baby has daycare these days. Don’t forget his butt cream. I was…
Yesterday, I couldn’t get out of bed. I barely willed myself to do the dishes. I can’t explain why. Nothing had really “happened.” There wasn’t some explosive meltdown or feelings of inadequacy. I just got scared. So scared. I remember when I was a child and I would wake up from a bad dream and find myself in between my parents, completely safe and free or fear. Now I find myself in my son’s bed, my body curled next to his, never wanting to let go, knowing every morning I…
Fall is always a rough time of year for me emotionally and mentally. I know it, I prepare for it, gear up for it and let the chips fall where they may. This year fall has been exceptionally challenging because my son started kindergarten in a new school. His autism and anxiety demand routine. To say this transition has been hard is an understatement. Not to mention that only 6 weeks into the school year his new school has asked us to find a different placement for him (that’s a…
