Posts by Kate Swenson
Touch
Cooper has always communicated by touch. I like to believe it’s a nonverbal thing. His autism thing. And a Cooper thing. In my mind it’s a way to feel and show someone emotion when it’s hard to understand the words. Or facial expressions. It’s a way to say ‘I love you’ or ‘I am mad’ when the words can’t come out. It’s a way to get someone’s attention too. Listen to me. Look at me. Notice me. If Cooper really likes you, he will touch your face ever so gently.…
Read MoreOur Wilderness Trip to the Wisconsin Dells
A few days ago, our family returned from our first ever Spring Break vacation. Because we are unable to fly right now (it’s a huge goal for Cooper but he’s not there ‘yet) we decided to visit the Wisconsin Dells. A destination about 3 hours away from us that has the best waterparks. All three of our boy’s love swimming and it’s an activity that we can all do together. And our absolutely hands down favorite place to stay and swim in the Dell is The Wilderness Resort. For many…
Read MoreSafe Room, Premiering on Lifetime, Features Actually Autistic Actor, Nik Sanchez
This Saturday, on the 15th, Lifetime will be premiering Safe Room, a thriller that centers on recently widowed Lila Jackson (Nicole Ari Parker) and her 14-year-old autistic son Ian (Nik Sanchez). Since the death of her husband, Lila is grateful for their kind neighbor Neil (Boris Kodjoe), who looks out for them. After Ian accidentally witnesses a break-in in the house across the street and records the horrific murder of the homeowner, Lila becomes embroiled in a deadly struggle to protect her son from intruders Dominic (Mackenzie Astin) and Rocco…
Read MoreI Need More Time With You
My son, Your birthday is in 8 days. You have been counting down since mid December. You love your birthday. And you love being older. So much so that you are already telling people you are 9 years old. I lovingly correct you every time, reminding you that you are still my 8 year old. I also threaten you with a potion that will keep you little forever. But you have no time for that nonsense. You want to grow up. I want time to stop. Last night you snuggled…
Read MoreTo the People Who Live Outside Our World
To people who live outside of our world: I have a favor to ask you. When you see that child screaming uncontrollably on the floor of the supermarket. Stop. Pause. And… Before you blame the parents, Before you shake your head in disgust, Before you make snide comments about lack of discipline, And most importantly, before you judge the child, Stop. And know that… You may be seeing autism at its most challenging. It’s most confusing. A child who may simply have seen, heard, or smelled something new and not…
Read MoreChoose the Light
The comment read, ‘for some autism families, there is no light at the end of the tunnel.’ I thought about that comment all last night. And when my toddler woke up at midnight for a hug, and when I nursed my baby, and then again while I drank my coffee and watched the news. I thought back to our most challenging days when there was no apparent light at the end of the tunnel. Our autistic son didn’t sleep longer than 45 minutes at a time and we started every…
Read MoreThe “Too Much” Kid
See that little one on the right? He is 3 years old and he’s my ‘too much’ kid. Too much energy. Too much noise. Too much joy. Too much love. I call him spirited. Some say feral. He goes a mile a minute and usually needs to be reminded to slow down. Like this morning I told him his pants were on inside out. And that he only had one sock on. He had no idea. But then again, he notices when his baby sister has a runny nose and…
Read MoreWe Pour Love Into Them
This morning I was sitting on the couch drinking my coffee, soaking up some quiet time before my two littles woke up when my 3 year old came wandering in. He was dragging his blue blanket, the taggies in his hand. His hair was mussed, creases from his pillow still on his cheeks. He saw me, smiled, and immediately climbed up me and the chair and wiggled his little body next to me to make room. This is how every day starts. We snuggle. At least once he will whisper…
Read MoreYou Happily Went to School
My son, This morning you happily went to school. That sentence right there. I felt the tears pooling in my eyes as I typed it just seconds ago. Happily. Went. School. At 6 AM you used your words to say…’SS-OO-LL.’ You held up one finger to remind me that it’s Friday and you have one day of school. Then two days with mom and dad. You put your own shoes on, brought me your coat, gathered up your treasures, picked up your backpack, and waited calmly by the door. It…
Read MoreThe Forever Dads
I imagine it’s different for the dads. The dads like my husband. Last night I sat in the bleachers of a cold hockey rink watching my middle son play hockey. I glanced back behind me and took note of all the dads standing in a row. My husband was sandwiched in-between a group of 5 or so men. A snapshot out of the suburbia playbook. They all shared a striking resemblance. Black jackets. Black facemasks. All wearing hats. We are in the stage of life I suppose. Our peers are…
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