Balancing Work and Parenthood

Last night this little peanut snuck down the stairs after he was supposed to be sleeping. He peeked his head around the staircase and said, ‘mama, when are you going to bed?’ I told him after the news but he didn’t seen satisfied with that answer. ‘I never see you anymore because of your dumb job. You are always working lately. I miss you.’ And with that he was down the stairs and in my arms asking to sleep in my bed. It’s bizarre lately. I am with my babies…

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Hunger

Hello. My name is Carrie. I am married to a man named Joe and we have four boys and one daughter and our second son, Jack, has autism. He is sixteen. Today I’d like to talk about something that can make people uncomfortable. Food. Listen, I love food. Our family loves food. You might say food is our love language. I don’t necessarily love to cook aforementioned food, but listen, everything has its limitations. My son Jack loves to eat. He organizes his day around breakfast, lunch, dinner, snacks, and…

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My Dream for a Better Tomorrow

I dream of a world where Autistic is put in the special skills and strengths section of a CV and not the medical section. The knowledge should already exist that we have additional needs, we shouldn’t have to specify it on a form as a disability or disorder. Here is why the word Autistic should be respected, admired and in some cases envied. I cannot emphasize enough how much autistic people have shaped this world and provided global changing technology, medicine, knowledge, understanding of the unknown, detailed analysis of countless…

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The Secret Club of Siblings

Today is an exciting day. Today, I made a friend. As a young adult in a new city, this is a pretty huge achievement. We met at our apartment complex’s pool after I saw she was reading a book I have been meaning to read and the conversation moved from there. We talked about the places we want to visit when COVID is over, griped about our landlord, joked about how the Midwest is like your annoying sibling — if you’re from there, you’re allowed to make fun of it.…

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Dear Caregiver

Dear caregiver,  A letter of intent is something that was just recently brought to my attention as something that I need to leave for you. Sure, my husband and I are young, but I’m learning after losing a dear friend at twenty-eight, that life can be short.   We need to be prepared. A letter of intent is honestly a term I hadn’t heard of before, but the meaning behind it haunts me every single night. How will you know what he needs if I can’t communicate that for him? Sure,…

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It Could Be Him

When the lovely Kate from Finding Cooper’s Voice asked me if I would write about current events every now and again for her page, I thought, sure! Why not? I figured I’d glance across social media every once in a while and find stories about kids with autism. Maybe some of them would be heartwarming, or inspiring, or even a little bit sad. Maybe I’d touch upon discrimination, and heartache. But I’d keep it light, and bright, and motivational. Yet week after week, I read articles that affect me deeply—reports…

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A Special Needs Mama

A special needs mamaIs weary in her soulDay after dayHas taken its toll Years of sleepless nightsMany thankless jobsThe constant demandsAnd heart wrenching sobs The daily needs grind herAlmost to the boneThe exhaustion, the diapers,all of the unknown A son she prayed forWho’s unruly and wildA son she prayed forWho’s misunderstood as a child But wipe her tears she mustAnd get on with the dayFor duty calls againDuty – without pay The phone calls, the letters,She’s desperate for a breakWhy don’t they help?She thinks, for goodness sake She’ll make them…

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I Forgot About Autism

Hey autism. We forgot about you for a minute. Here we were just living life. Going about our days like “normal” people. Til’ this morning. I had a need for a good coffee and the girls wanted a milkshake so because things have been so “zen” around here, my silly guard was down and we went to the dome. As if we could just do the”get in the car” and “go sit in a restaurant” thing. I forgot. We got out of the car and immediately Rory bolted. I ran…

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I’ll Be There For You

After my son Harper and I lay down, he always requests a song. He will say “sing!” Then he will name a certain song. Lately, it has been the “Friends” song. Yep, you heard right…the theme song from the show, Friends. He is definitely his Mama’s child! He would prefer the whole song, but I normally just do the chorus. Tonight was different. Tonight, I sang the whole song. As he drifted off to sleep, I caught myself really listening to the words. Tonight, as I lay there singing my…

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Autism and Religion

I was raised Catholic. I married a Catholic man. We had our wedding in a Catholic church. We are raising our family by the Catholic faith. So when I watched a video where a Catholic priest in New Jersey who demanded a little boy with non-verbal autism leave the church during his sister’s baptism, I felt many things at once. It was a private ceremony. The boy was off to the side, stimming and running and self-regulating. I felt confused, and angry, and sad, and defeated. I felt tired. Hi.…

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