Archive for September 2019
The Handwriting on the Wall…
I walked into the playroom and realized James found the ONE marker that wasn’t tucked away in the closet with the other messy villains like glitter and Play-Doh that are only allowed supervised play dates. He had written his name in large purple letters underneath his big sister’s artwork. When he realized I was standing there, he proudly announced, “Tahdah!” with his charming little smile. While my initial reaction was frustration and to grab my magic eraser, it was quickly replaced with the reminder that not very long ago I…
Read MoreSeverely Autistic Boy Handcuffed after School Allows him to Wander Off
Trevor Hibbert, a California father says he is planning legal action after his severely autistic son was found and handcuffed by police almost a mile away from his middle school. These stories are in the news almost daily now. I’m not sure if that has to do with the rise of social media, news outlets looking for a good story, or if this sort of thing is new. But I can tell you as a mom, they terrify me. And I can tell you as a blogger who shares these…
Read MoreWhat if he has Autism Mama
You were sitting on the living room floor trying to build a tower with your Legos. At six years old you looked like a teenager sitting there. Your baby face is completely gone. Your legs are getting long. Your hair so blonde and eyes so brown. The baby was all over you. On your legs. In your lap. Pulling at your toys. You kept rotating away from him. But he was onto you. You moved. He moved. I hear you yell, ‘Harbor! You wild baby!’ I looked up and you…
Read MoreBeing A Special Needs Parent Isn’t Something to Fear
I overheard two expectant mamas talking in a Chick-fil-A play area. They sat together on one bench, while their 3-4 year old boys played together, and they each were expecting a boy. I watched my own two boys play with these soon to be big brothers. These mamas chatted about pregnancy woes and pediatricians. And then the conversation took an unexpected turn. One of the mamas confessed that she’s constantly having fears that something will go wrong with the baby. It even keeps her up at night. What if her…
Read MoreWhy do I have to be ‘That Mom’
Why is it so hard to get services for our kiddos? Why do I feel that I am the only one who sees him? The real him. The fun, silly and loving him. Why do I have to annoy the school constantly….reminding them of who he is and how amazing he is? 4 weeks into school and every week (sometimes daily) it’s been something. He is not mean or aggressive….he is autistic and preverbal. He doesn’t understand what THEY want. He can’t communicate what HE wants. I’m saying what I…
Read MoreRegret, Remorse, Repentance
Every trip to the store ends the same way – with my son screaming and flailing on the floor. It is inevitable and without fail. It doesn’t matter what kind of distractions I use, what type of approach or discipline, he is a ticking time bomb, and within 15 to 20 minutes I will need to leave. It makes it impossible to finish any type of trip to the store or anywhere else really. I would be completely mortified when he screamed, eventually leaving the store in desperation with a…
Read MoreWhat if you have a Child with Special Needs?
We were married in the Lutheran faith and had to give up our precious weekend to attend a weekend of pre-marital counseling sessions. It was long and seemed completely unnecessary because we were madly in love. The class was centered on ‘deep’ questions that prompted discussion between couples. How would you handle a partner with an addiction? Or a partner that lies? A partner who gambles? We obviously didn’t have those problems since we were best friends so we breezed through. Oh the arrogance of twenty-something kids. Jamie and I…
Read MoreJust Try Sweet Boy
I have this memory burned in my brain. And if you follow me I speak of it often. I was a first time mom. My son was 2 years old and Early Intervention was sitting in my living room. Red flags had been identified as they say. The nice woman had a booklet…it had to be a 100 pages long. Her job was to figure out what my son couldn’t do. Question after question. Always, often, sometimes, never, unknown. Bubbles filled in as we went along. It was awkward and…
Read MoreWe Don’t Take Kids With Autism
So something really weird happened the other day… I called a dentist to schedule an appointment for my son and the conversation went like this… Me: “Hi my name’s Amber and I was wondering if I could schedule an initial consult for my son? He’s 5 years old and I should mention he has autism.” Receptionist: “We don’t take kids with autism.” Me: “ummmmmmm….what do you mean you don’t take kids with autism?” Receptionist: “Cause of their autism medicine, we don’t deal with that here.” Me: “Ummmmmm… What’s autism medicine?” Receptionist: “The…
Read MoreThe Role of a Big Brother
I know being his big brother is different than you imagined… You were 4 when I was pregnant with our rainbow baby. You knew mommy was pregnant before this but the baby didn’t make it and we would try again. You were beyond excited. You told me you secretly wished it would be a sister but you were totally ok if it turns out to be a brother. After we found out for sure it was a boy you exclaimed “oh, I change my mind mommy I’m so excited to…
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