Posts Tagged ‘special needs sibling’
Born an Advocate
I heard his little voice before I saw him. ‘Cooper. Cooper. We don’t hurt our body. We love it.’ I peeked around the corner. What I saw made me gasp. The three year old who wants to be 9 like his next older brother. Blonde hair. Bare feet. Scabbed over knees from a crash on his bike. A Paw Patrol costume half on. He was holding a Ninja Turtle in one hand. The other hand was stretched out. Holding his older brother’s hand. Cooper. He is 11 years old. And…
Read MoreThe Gift of Sight
When I used to think about autism, back when it was a word used to describe someone else’s child, and eventually when our son was first diagnosed, I used to think about the differences. Autism meant he would be different. And that made me so scared for him. Because I knew the world could be unkind. I would hyper focus at 3 am or while in the shower on all the ‘nevers.’ The differences. The challenges. The worries that would drop me to my knees. He may never talk. He…
Read MoreBeing Kind is the Most Important Thing
See that boy on the left? The one in blue… He is 9 years old. He is in 3rd grade. At least once a week he tells me he can’t wait to be a grown up so he can ride dirt bikes and do whatever he wants. But he also reminds me he is never moving out. He plans to live in the backyard. We had his school conference a few weeks ago. His teacher told us all about his test scores for math. We talked all about developing skills…
Read MoreA Letter to My Little Brother
A letter to my little brother… Hey brother, I’m hoping that someday I can say this all to you. But there is a chance that I might never be able too…I’m hoping that when you are older you will read this and understand. I know I confuse you. I’m so loud. I flap my arms. I don’t notice toys. Or play sports. Or like to leave our house. I don’t play like you. I have never ridden a bike and I don’t care at all about hockey. And I know…
Read MoreMy One of a Kind Boy
This kid I tell ya. He’s my one of a kind boy. He brings me a container of ice cream for breakfast. He finds a highlighter and colors on my computer and feels no worry when showing me his beautiful artwork. He puts things in the toilet. He is always happy. Always smiling. And always mischievous. He’s curious. Like take the couch apart curious. He gives out hugs and kisses nonstop. He adores his siblings. And wants to grow up so badly. He wants to be big like Soy. (His…
Read MoreSlow Down Little One
A few nights ago, during family movie night, I found my lap wide open. I wasn’t nursing a baby. I wasn’t holding a wiggly toddler. I wasn’t grabbing snacks or drinks. I was alone, in a recliner, feet up. Now this may not sound rare to most, but as a mom of four, I often feel like my body is comparable to a jungle gym. A few minutes went by before my 9-year-old appeared at my side. He tugged on my sleeve and told me that his cheeks felt hot.…
Read MoreHis Siblings are Making Their way In
My son Cooper has always reached for a hand to hold when we are in the community. But not just any hand. Typically, mom or dad. He likes to feel safe. He likes to know that we are near. Yes, he is 11 years old and by this point in a boy’s life they typically die of embarrassment when holding a parent’s hand. But not our Cooper. He loves holding hands. He likes the comfort of us walking alongside him. Sometimes we lead. Sometimes he does. But he’s always an…
Read MoreFind Those Moments
A memory showed up in my newsfeed today. A really special one that I never want to forget. It read… Today was a really big day in our little world. Huge really. This morning my son Cooper went to his brother’s school to have his school photo taken by Lifetouch. He has never had a school photo taken before. Because he goes to a therapy center. And that’s one of those little things that stings and feels unfair. Because a school photo matters. To me it does. There’s more too……
Read MoreThe World is a Better Place Because He is in It
This is baby Harbor. The third baby. The third boy. The third little thief of sleep and sanity. He turned 3 years old in October. He is kicking soccer balls, negotiating in full sentences, eating with a fork, playing hockey and incredibly curious. Of all three of my boys, he is the busiest. He wants to know how things work. Like the toilet. And Kleenex boxes. And mud puddles. He has the biggest personality. And he wants to be grown up. With every food he eats he lets me know…
Read MoreTwo Brothers
This picture. The older brother watching the younger brother play goalie. Probably seems like nothing special. But it is. It’s hugely special. It’s years of hard work and practice. It’s deep breaths and waiting patiently. It’s noise and sound and cold. It’s also a family, all together, watching a hockey game. I don’t know a lot about autism. I am no expert. I can’t tell you the mysteries of my son for sure. Nor can I always tell you they why or the how. But I can tell you, that…
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