Posts Tagged ‘special needs sibling’
His Brother’s Safe Space
A few days ago we took a boat ride. Sawyer brought two friends. A brother and sister who are very much a part of our family. The big kids, Cooper included, all wanted to sit in front and screamed at Jamie to go faster. They were also supposed to watch for logs but that part didn’t happen. As we boated along we hit some rough water. It only lasted a minute or so. Pretty common on a Friday on the St. Croix River. Anyhow, Cooper squealed as a bit of…
Read MoreWild Ones
Some kids are just mischievous. Wild. Busy. Exasperating. Curious. Spirited. All words we choose instead of naughty. They see a puddle and have to jump in it. A glass of water and have to dump it. A counter and have to climb it. They see a toy and immediately want to know how it works. How it’s wired. Taking it apart becomes vital. What’s it made of they think. They see mail and need to know what’s inside. A package becomes a possibility. It could be a Nerf gun or…
Read MoreTwo Brothers
Back in the beginning, when the folder was slid across the table, and the words ‘severe nonverbal autism’ were said out loud… I remember wishing for a crystal ball. I wanted to know what the future held for my boy. His brother. Our family. I begged. I pleaded. I bargained. I prayed. For a glimpse. This is the one I wish I could have seen. Right here. A moment in time. In the peace from the chaos. Two brothers. Two years apart. One verbal. One not. One on track. One…
Read MoreIs He Happy?
Today was a day. Long. Hot. A bit boring. Fun at times. The kids are figuring out this summer vacation thing. So are mom and dad. Schedule changes are tough I tell ya. It takes time to settle in. To figure out how to slow down. I watched my two oldest, Sawyer and Cooper, swim for over an hour. At first, just Cooper wanted to swim. It’s his most favorite activity ever. He’s a fish in the water. An autistic adult told me once that being under water is the…
Read MoreMy Favorite Thing About You
My son, Today is the first day of summer vacation for you. You are 9 and yesterday was your last day of third grade. On the walk to the car after your day, not one minute into summer, you said, I’m a fourth grader now. You have always wanted to be older. Bigger. Faster. You have never had time for little kid stuff. I’ve noticed as we’ve entered these in-between years, parenting is getting a bit more confusing. I find myself questioning myself a lot. Wondering if I’m doing the…
Read MoreWhy Doesn’t He Talk Mama?
‘Brother doesn’t talk mama……’ That’s what he said to me a few months after he turned three. He was downstairs with his older brother. Eight years between them. The conversation one sided when I peeked in. The older brother dancing to the songs on his iPad. The younger brother playing dinosaurs. The moved around the room together. Clumsily. Interacting at times. But more often not. ‘Why doesn’t he talk mama?’ I did my best to explain autism to the tiny human who I know without a doubt will grow up…
Read MoreBe Thankful it Happened
Are you a glass half full or half empty kind of person? I like to think I’m glass half full. I strive for optimism. Mostly. Lately I’ve been a bit down. The season of life getting to me a bit. My three year…he is pure joy. I call him my too much kid. Too much noise. Too much mess. Joy. Love. Energy. All of it. He reminds me to look at this life with happy eyes. Like this exchange… “How was your day buddy? Good. Who did you play with?…
Read MoreA Hundred Shades of Color
One of the things I’ve learned in my 39 years is that there is more than one way to look at something. Most things are complicated. Intricate I guess. They aren’t simple. While we assume things will be black and white, cut and dry, they are actually a hundred shades of color. I’ve even learned that my heart and mind can feel differently too. As if at odds with each other. I just took my oldest and youngest sons to the park this afternoon. Our park. The one place where…
Read More“When is it Sawyer’s Turn?”
As a mama I often feel like my mind is a Rolodex of memories. With four babies, I have so many of them. Births to birthdays, first smiles to first steps. Preschool graduation. Home runs. Road-trips. Some are readily available. Resurfacing often, bringing simultaneous smiles and tear to my eyes. But others, they are buried down deep, seemingly forgotten, until something reminds me. A sound. A smell. Another child. My younger babies doing what the now older ones once did. And there it is. A memory of something not forgotten.…
Read MoreHe’s My Home
My ‘older’ middle son has been having some big feelings lately. He is 9 years old and sandwiched in between two very big personalities and a baby sister. I think sometimes it can be lonely to be the ‘easy’ one. His dad and I are working for hard to make sure he knows how magnificent and treasured he is. And doing our best to navigate some uncharted waters. We want to speak to his heart. Last night a movie on the couch with popcorn and tickles. This morning a doughnut…
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