Posts Tagged ‘Special Needs Parenting’
Five Reasons Why I’m Thankful for Autism
Most day I could probably write a longer grocery list of why autism is so hard on us and Zachary, my nonverbal child. If you could make the best life for your child, you would. No questions ask. If I could ease his troubles and anxiety, I would in a heartbeat. Autism has significantly changed my life and perspectives on things. I had thought I was a grateful person beforehand, and maybe I was, but looking back it seems far more shallow. Here is my “grocery list” of 5 reasons…
Read MoreWhat Regression Means in Our World
I want to talk about regressions in our autism world. That word. Regression. A loss of skills. A set back. Starting over. If I didn’t live it I wouldn’t believe it. I know there is a clinical definition. Those never seem to sum it up for us though. A regression is like having the rug pulled out from under you. It’s two steps forward and three steps back. It’s working every single day on using a straw. Mastering it. And then one day, waking up, and not knowing how to…
Read MoreThankful For All Those Who Have Crossed Our Path
My name is Stacy Hartmann. My husband Danny and I have been married for 8 years. We have a son named River, who is 5 and a daughter named Adeline, who is 2. We live near our families in Southern California where Danny works as a electrical engineer and I am a stay at home mom. River was diagnosed with Aspergers Syndrome just a year ago. While our son was the center of our world, my husband and I always knew something about him was different. As a baby he…
Read MoreCall Baapa
“Call Baapa. Call Baapa. Call Baapa. Call Baapa. Call Baapa.” Conor repeated this over and over and over (and over and over) while he paged through a book on the living room floor. He was stuck. This has started happening more lately and it always breaks me. As I stood there silent I couldn’t stop the tears from rolling down my cheeks again. I just wish his brain worked right, the thought swept over me again for the 100th time that week. Conor was diagnosed with Fragile X Syndrome shortly after his second…
Read MoreWhen the Differences are Noticeable
When my autistic son was two and three I remember thinking….at least he can blend in. He’s so cute that no one will ever know he is different. Or that he has autism. For some reason that mattered at the time. I think it was a comfort thing. Now, he is almost eight. And he yells, runs, rolls, crawls, flaps, eats anything he finds on the ground, and so on. He has licked strangers. He has eaten snow of stranger’s boots. It’s now apparent to me that we will never…
Read MoreHe Isn’t a Sad Story…
“… he isn’t a sad story.” Those are the words that changed my world. I always dreamed of becoming a mother. There was nothing I wanted more in life. Boy or girl I didn’t care, I just wanted a healthy little baby to love. I remember the day we found out we were having a little boy. My husband Josh was over the moon happy, talking about all the things they would do together. I think a part of the excitement came from him not growing up with his father…
Read MoreLife Changes
Have you ever had that feeling, like your world just stopped turning? Like you are standing still, but everyone around you is moving forward? So dramatic, I know, but this isn’t like in the movies when your whole life “flashes before your eyes” or when scenes from your past/present go racing by on a fast train or something. When my son was almost two years old, the long road to his autism diagnosis began. This was also the point where my world quickly shifted to revolving solely around autism, and…
Read MoreIf You Are Struggling, Find Your Person
I am a wallflower. An introvert. Painfully shy. Making new friends in your thirties is hard. For many reasons, it seems even harder when you are Mom to a child with disabilities. Cloaked in a facade of smiles and ‘He’s coming alongs’, it can be mentally exhausting to keep cheerful and happy and all the things that make someone want to be friends with you. My dear friend Kristin calls this her mask and I think it is the best way to describe how many Moms feel on this journey.…
Read MoreTo the Friend Who Persisted Through my Son’s Autism Diagnosis
“Let me know if you need anything. I know what it’s like. When my son was two years old, he also had to have surgery.” Those are words very few people can say to someone whose baby is recovering from a major surgery and their entire world has just been flipped upside down. My friend spoke those words to me when my son had brain surgery. Brain surgery. Words I cannot even believe I can type so nonchalantly, because in retrospect, that wasn’t even the hardest part of our journey. The hardest…
Read MoreBehaviors are Communication
My autistic son can’t tell me what he’s feeling. He can’t tell me if he’s scared or nervous. The words don’t come out. So he shows me instead. And those feelings usually come out in bizarre ways. We call them behaviors. They are typically frustrating. They usually drive a person crazy. That’s the hard part about severe autism. My message today…behaviors are communication. A few nights ago, Cooper patted the chair next to me. He smiled. And climbed his body up onto my lap. He wedged his way in…in the…
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