Posts Tagged ‘Special Needs Parenting’
This Is Independence
Two weeks ago, this kid asked me to ride the bus. Sorta out of the blue. He verbalized it…’H-U-SSS.’ (B’s are hard for him.) He showed me busses on YouTube. He showed me busses in books. He pointed them out in the community. And me, being the mom I am, smiled, cheered, and thought…no way. I’m too scared. He’s too vulnerable. I can’t do it. Nope. But his dad, well he reminded me how I preach about independence. Nonstop. I want my son to make his own choices. I want…
Read MoreHe Did His Best
Today was a big day for this kid and our family. We went to the Afton Apple Orchard. You know the kind with lots of noise and people and waiting and walking. And we went as a family. We invited our friends to come along as well. See in our world, we need help. We know that now. We know our strengths and our weaknesses. And our Cooper, he requires both mom and dad sometimes. We had a lot of wins today. Cooper petted his first llama, sheep, donkey and…
Read MoreThe Stories We Share
We are just a few weeks away from celebrating the 6th anniversary Henry’s autism diagnosis. We celebrate now, but back then it was a different story. Six years ago, I was nervous and confused. I can admit it now, but I knew nothing about autism before his diagnosis. It’s hard to believe because autism is now my life and my work. But yes, at that point, I knew nothing more about it besides a few characters in TV and movies. Henry had a lot of the textbook signs back then:…
Read MoreYou Will Be His Best Advocate
Sawyer, I am writing down the stories of you so that someday, when you are older, we can look back together at them. Sawyer, your brother Cooper started at your school last week. At first I didn’t know what you would think. Would you be nervous? Excited? Worried? Of course, you amazed me. Your response when I told you was….’now I can watch out for my brother, mama.’ You were so excited. I was a bit worried though. I want you to be a kid and not have to worry…
Read MoreDon’t Be Afraid of the Label
My son, Chase, started school a couple of weeks before his fifth birthday. He had never been in a school setting before. Had never been in a “structured” environment. That first year of school turned out to be, what I would say, just short of, a disaster. Chase was in trouble multiple times a week. I felt like I was getting a call at least once a day, and was in meetings every two to three weeks. I was told Chase had aggression and anger issues. Chase was throwing a…
Read MoreDid I Do Enough For Her?
When I found out my third baby was going to be a girl, I was really excited. I had two boys already and was curious how adding a little girl into the mix was going to be. I thought, and hoped, maybe my girl won’t have as many challenges that my boys had. I had a really good pregnancy with Grace. They didn’t find any anomalies in the womb like they did with her brother Daniel. She came on my scheduled due date unlike my son Nicholas who was born…
Read MoreFive Things I Wish I Knew Before An Autism Diagnosis
If you are new to this autism journey and are wondering how to process all the information out there, here are some things I wish I had known while going through the process. All autism characteristics do not all fit into a checklist. Many of the early signs of autism we recognized later in our son as he got older did not fit into the standard website search. Our son, at an early age, loved anything round. He carried around balls, round fruit, played with practically anything in the form…
Read MoreEvery Autism Mama
I’d like to take a moment, and introduce you to an autism mama. You’ve seen her before, pushing a cart in the grocery store, or holding hands with a teenager in the parking lot. She usually looks tired. Maybe her mouth is pressed into a thin line, her skin a papery white. This autism mama, she might come across as impatient, or abrupt at times. Try not to take it personally. She has formed a kind of shell, you see—a layer to protect herself against well-meaning comments about behavior and…
Read MoreAn Apology to My Children
To my children – my little marvels, I am writing you this letter to tell you how sorry I am. But first and foremost I want you to know that I love you. You may already know by the time you read this that I am not the best communicator. I am generally quite articulate, I use long words and I can talk about complex issues. However, I am not good at making general conversation and I do not find it easy to talk about my feelings. Both of these…
Read MoreLook For the Silver Lining
So many things could be said about the lack of “sunshine” surrounding a diagnosis such as Autism Spectrum Disorder. It’s labeled as rigid. And scary. And lonely. And most people (including us early on) are uneducated about ASD. Simply because it is thought to be almost “taboo”. In our case, we went through all the stages of grief (denial, anger, bargaining… all of them). Then you do yourself a favor, and you arm yourself with knowledge. Suddenly, the sky clears up, and you come around to the “acceptance” stage. I…
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