Posts Tagged ‘special needs family’
Loving Our Son For Who He Is With No Expectations
This post is about the ‘start’ of our autism journey with our now 17 year old son Cody, who is on the severe end of the autism spectrum. This is when I first realized that my life was not going to be as I had anticipated or even hoped it was going to be and how I learned to be okay with it. And more importantly, how I turned those lost hopes and dreams into what is now my only desire. A lifetime of happiness for my son with no…
Read MoreObservations From an Autism Mom
Off he went in a flash in the big open gym. He darted away not to play with other kids at the birthday party, but instead to play with a curtain on the far right side of the room that separates the small space from the big gym. He happily pulled the curtain open and closed it again. Over and over. He then darted off to throw a basketball in the hoop. He laughed as he picked up the ball and threw it in. Within a few seconds, he was…
Read MoreMy Son, You Showed Me That I Was Stronger Than Autism
A Letter to my son Daniel: It’s hard to believe you are already fourteen months old, as it feels like just yesterday I was holding you in my arms for the first time. I know you are still a baby but I hope to read you this letter one day when you can better understand it all. Watching you grow and reach exciting milestones this past year has healed my heart in so many ways and brought so much joy to my life. You are always smiling and laughing and…
Read MoreMy Son, You Are So Much More Than Autism
Oh, my little pumpkin, what a strange, crazy, exhausting ride this autism thing has been. How did this happen? You were my surprise baby in every way! It was a struggle to get pregnant with your brother. We tried for two years then with the help of fertility pills I finally got pregnant. My doctor told me if I ever wanted to get pregnant it would have to be very planned because I would have to be on fertility pills. I don’t ovulate. Sixteen years later at age 41…SURPRISE! I…
Read MoreIt Happened This Year…I Got a Miracle
It happened this year… I got a Christmas miracle! When you have a kiddo with autism, or delays of any kind, there’s this period of grace. It’s the season of life where adults (for the most part) have or gain some knowledge. It’s the season of life where older kiddos are curious and learn something new. It’s the season of life where kiddos of the same age and younger don’t have a clue. At family gatherings, kiddos just play. Side by side, sometimes joining in, most often not. Fun is…
Read MoreTo My Daughter, One Day I Hope You Understand
I watch you so often struggling, and I see you getting the short end of the stick far too often. But I hope that one day you will understand that your Mom loves you and that I tried the best that I could. I had so many dreams of being your Mom. I was going to read fabulous literature to you. I was going to champion your every effort. I was going to have home cooked delicious meals for you every night. I was going to ensure that you had…
Read MoreSometimes, Numbers Do Lie
Dear Holden, Your mama is a numbers person. As are you! I have “data” in my work title and I thrive on knowing things through their relationship to others. So when I heard that you were “on the spectrum” I did not find that explanation to be terribly satisfactory. Where, exactly, on the spectrum were you? I had this new information about you and yet it seemed to tell me absolutely nothing. So, I went looking for numbers and, honey, what I found was not good. An estimated 75-85 percent…
Read MoreAnd Just Like That, My Baby is Five
Yesterday was Sawyer’s fifth birthday. I know I don’t show all that much about Sawyer on this blog. I try to focus my posts around autism and everything that goes into having a child on the spectrum. I do that because I know that some day Sawyer will read this website. He already talks about Finding Cooper’s Voice with me. I want him to be able to tell his story if and when he is ready. Some day, I hope he spreads autism awareness like me. Anyhow, I wanted to…
Read MoreMy Son Is Not Broken, My Son Has Autism
My son has Autism. Whew, boy does that feel good to put it out there! I’ve had an internal battle with myself whether that was something that I wanted to put out there for everyone to know, but I’ve finally asked myself why?? Am I ashamed? Absolutely not. Am I seeking sympathy? That is the last thing I want. So why? Why put it out there so vulnerably? My Son has Autism The answer is simple….for my son. It is all just for him. I’m doing it in hopes that…
Read MoreThis is My Life
Sometimes I still can’t believe that this is my life. My son is the one in whatever the number is now. I am that mom. That is our family. I still honestly believe he will surprise us all. He’ll be the one you hear about. The one where when they’re older you’d never know. I am not ashamed of my son, nor his disability. It is a part of him and makes him who he is. But what I wouldn’t give to just make things a little easier for him. …
Read More